this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2024
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Asklemmy

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[–] queermunist@lemmy.ml 48 points 11 months ago (4 children)

I want to be played by a dog

My life isn't very interesting, but it'd really spice things up if they had a dog try to do it.

[–] Asafum@feddit.nl 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

There's no rule that says a dog can't play ~~basketball~~ a person!

:P

[–] Archer@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

The Air Bud cinematic universe is a lawless hellscape

[–] SARGE@startrek.website 7 points 11 months ago

What's the story, Wishbone?

[–] tetris11@lemmy.ml 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

You spent the first few years of your life, catching tail and sniffing butt, winning through life on loveable personality alone, and becoming a loyal and devoted partner, spending your sunset years curled up on a nice seat, watching the kids do their thing and getting occasional head pats from strangers for a life well lived and job well done.

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[–] Repelle@lemmy.world 33 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Aubrey Plaza. She’s way hotter than me (that’s kinda the point), and not half Japanese (will make the racist parts confusing and/or hilarious) but she could definitely pull off my resting bitch face and general disdain for everything.

[–] viking@infosec.pub 32 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Ed Sheeran. Specifically because he's not an actor and would stumble through the movie just like I stumbled through life. All ginger, no plan.

[–] Crackhappy@lemmy.world 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

All Ginger No Plan - that's an amazing life motto. ;)

[–] Albbi@lemmy.ca 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Sounds like the name of a stand up comedy special.

[–] JWBananas@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Sounds like an orange cat

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[–] flicker@lemmy.world 30 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Danny Devito.

...I'm a woman.

[–] BigLime@lemmy.ml 7 points 11 months ago

I refer to him as Daddy DeVito

... I'm a dude.

[–] Hubi@feddit.org 20 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I'm pretty tall, so the logical choice would be Tom Cruise on 12 inch heels.

[–] 200ok@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago

Three Tom Cruises in a trenchcoat

[–] johsny@lemmy.world 18 points 11 months ago

Brad Pitt.

Bit of a downgrade but I can live with it.

[–] Nasan@sopuli.xyz 17 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Gary Oldman, dude's a chameleon. I'm sure he could find a way to play a mid 30s SE Asian dude

[–] The_Che_Banana@beehaw.org 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

On the other hand, if you had Will Ferrel play you, but he and everyone is completely unaware that he is SE asian.

[–] Nasan@sopuli.xyz 4 points 11 months ago

I'd take him as a second choice if I couldn't get Gary. To muddy the waters a bit I'd try to get Ken Watanabe and Shohreh Aghdashloo to play my parents.

[–] MegaUltraChicken@lemmy.world 15 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I want my movie to be cast entirely with Muppets and Tim Walz.

[–] Enkrod@feddit.org 5 points 11 months ago

Best answer

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[–] itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml 12 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Christopher Walken, Jeff Goldblum, Willem Dafoe, and Gary Oldman. All of them.

[–] thenextguy@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Everywhere, all at once.

[–] thejoker954@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

So sorta like the imaginarium of Dr. parnissius? ( its called something along those lines lol)

[–] MajorHavoc@programming.dev 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

David Cross and Bob Odenkirk, with a made-up face surgery scene mid-film to explain the change.

[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

They're both male so I'm assuming you were very ugly and bald at some point but now not quite as ugly and your hairline is ...un-receding?

Jk

[–] MajorHavoc@programming.dev 8 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

I'm actually a beautiful woman. They will both have to agree to substantial surgeries before they agree to play me.

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[–] DahGangalang@infosec.pub 9 points 11 months ago

Zac Efron.

The girl I was crushing on in high school crushed on him really hard as he appeared in High School Musical. I spent wayyyy too much of my youth trying to emulate Zac Efron as a result. Eventually, that whole style just kinda became my whole style. Seems like a good fit.

[–] random_character_a@lemmy.world 9 points 11 months ago

Nicolas Cage

Looks nothing like, but it would be funny as hell and in order to get him to sign up, they would have to make it somehow trippy and surreal.

[–] Vampire@hexbear.net 9 points 11 months ago

Nice try FBI

[–] reagansrottencorpse@lemmy.ml 8 points 11 months ago (3 children)

John Malkovich, I don't know why. I just like him. And I think he would be kind in my portrayal.

[–] thenextguy@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

In Soviet Russia, John Malkovich being you.

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[–] Marin_Rider@aussie.zone 7 points 11 months ago

Karl Pilkington. he would do a great job of complaining about every minor inconvenience I've dealt with

[–] TerminalEncounter@hexbear.net 7 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Lady Gaga

I bear no resemblance. I can't sing. I just think she's neat.

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[–] OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I’ve been told more than once that I look like β€œthat creepy Scarecrow guy from Batman Begins.” So I guess Cillian Murphy. I didn’t like looking creepy tho.

[–] Mothra@mander.xyz 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

They meant hot, but didn't dare say it.

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[–] Mothra@mander.xyz 6 points 11 months ago

People say I look like Carrie Ann Moss (Trinity) but as a child I had more Lucy Lawless resemblances. So I don't know, but either case they'll have to get a tan cause I'm more of a Penelope Cruz skin tone.

[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 6 points 11 months ago

Adrien Brody.

I'm told, quite often, I look like him. Plus he's a method actor or whatever do we would get to hang out which might be cool. He seems nice.

I look like a middle-aged Richard Gere, with hair loss. All action on the sides, and nothing on top.

[–] Monument@lemmy.sdf.org 5 points 11 months ago

For the 5% of my adult life that I’ve had short hair and no beard: Quentin Tarantino. For the rest of my bearded, long-haired adulthood: Steve Burke from Gamers Nexus. But they need to have blue/green eyes and forehead wrinkles.
(Huh. On paper that just sounds like I look like Nick Offerman, but not really.)

[–] ODuffer@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

Rowan Atkinson.

[–] thrawn@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Was hoping to see Margot Robbie in here requesting Margot Robbie play her

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[–] AnnaFrankfurter@lemmy.ml 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Some lonely sad miserable and depressed actor

[–] Crackhappy@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

No question at all, definitely Tim Robbins, although he is older than me, we are fan casting.

Melissa McCarthy, she has a good sense of humor which is great because my life is kind of a joke.

[–] Johny5@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago (1 children)

John Cusack (high fidelity)

[–] thenextguy@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

John Cusack (Gross Pointe Blank)

[–] Sequentialsilence@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Jason Mamoa. I look like if he took a break from the gym for a year. He and I also share several hobbies.

[–] distantsounds@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)
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