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When you aren't a husk of human, it's easier to see the obvious truth (hexbear.net)

submitted 1 month ago by RNAi@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

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[-] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 67 points 1 month ago

Trump was like damb I need to pick a weird freak for my VP cap-think wait, I know the guy!

[-] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 58 points 1 month ago

We were robbed of the perfect VP pick santos

[-] FuckyWucky@hexbear.net 43 points 1 month ago

Santos has more rizz unironically

[-] LaGG_3@hexbear.net 28 points 1 month ago

How do I pop open a warphole to that messy messy alternate universe?

[-] CyberSyndicalist@hexbear.net 27 points 1 month ago

1 too many letters in his name

[-] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 24 points 1 month ago

maybe jd vance is actually george santos in drag twice

[-] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

JorDge Svancetos

[-] uSSRI@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

We are through the looking glass, people pepe-silvia

[-] Findom_DeLuise@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

think-about-it

[-] Rom@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago

jeb

[-] naom3@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

It’s not fair cri

[-] mkultrawide@hexbear.net 39 points 1 month ago

Eric and Don Jr are the ones who pushed him to pick JD Vance, apparently.

We really need a Kendall and Roman Roy emoji.

[-] Justice@lemmygrad.ml 35 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I thought one thing Trump was smart enough to know was to never ever listen to his oldest sons. I mean he could've probably just asked Barron in a text like "JD Vance 👍 or 👎?" And get a response like "Dad, never make any of Don or Eric's friends VP" This is just common sense. He could've asked literally anyone except those two. Incredibly stupid decision made extra annoying by the decent chance we have to hear JD dipshit ass speak for 4-12 years. Kinda makes me want to make some delicious toast while taking a bath.

[-] mkultrawide@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

According to reports, he was going to pick Doug Bergum until Eric and Don Jr convinced him to go with Vance.

[-] miz@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Burgumentum

[-] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 49 points 1 month ago

I like to interpret the second part to mean he has a court order restricting him from being within 100 yards of a couch

[-] EmoThugInMyPhase@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago

100 yards of IKEA

[-] ChaosMaterialist@hexbear.net 48 points 1 month ago

geordi-no 2004 Swiftboat

geordi-yes 2024 Horny Couch

This may not be the most important election, but it's gearing up for the funniest.

[-] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 45 points 1 month ago

Let it not be overlooked that this guy isn't just a Kamala stan but an Elizabeth Warren stan, as we can see from the emojis communicating the wildly ill-advised "blood and teeth" slogan that the campaign staffers/volunteers had.

[-] RNAi@hexbear.net 2 points 3 days ago

Blood and teeth? Elizardbeth confirmed Nazi furry ?

[-] naom3@hexbear.net 23 points 1 month ago

Medieval heraldry but for twitter handle emojis

[-] CliffordBigRedDog@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago

Instead of the Guelphs and Ghibellines, we have bernie bros and warren stans

[-] keepcarrot@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

idk if I'd rank Warren as "worse" than Kamala except in the "bleeding off support from the left into electoral politics" sense

[-] GarbageShoot@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago

Kamala has a current Presidential campaign, the blood and teeth thing is from the Warren campaign in 2020. Whatever we might say about their political alignment, there is understandable reason for your Main Thing to be shilling for Harris. Warren is irrelevant.

[-] hypercracker@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

she really did not get enough shit for being a pretindian. that should be a career death sentence no matter what, straight up.

[-] Mindfury@hexbear.net 15 points 1 month ago

Pretty sure his pfp has the Warren colour that committed stans were getting holocaust tattoos of the hex code

[-] Teekeeus@hexbear.net 35 points 1 month ago

never pick a groyper as your running mate

[-] EmoThugInMyPhase@hexbear.net 28 points 1 month ago

Worse. Never pick a 40 year old groyper as your running mate

[-] Hello_Kitty_enjoyer@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago

can someone explain the couch thing

[-] Blockocheese@hexbear.net 47 points 1 month ago

Someone lied and said he said he fucked a couch in his book and put a random page number for it, people believed it for a little and then it got debunked.

One of the articles debunking it got removed i think based off the argument that you cant say for sure he didn't fuck a couch, you can only say he didn't say he did in his book which is adding fuel to the flames

[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 37 points 1 month ago

basically what that other dude said two minutes ago, except i wanted to add that it's hilarious because he seems like the type. it's probably still true, but a few days ago if you searched JD Vance Couch on any search engine, it was all headline news items from big outlets saying that JD Vance didn't have sexual intercourse with a couch.

which, i dunno, if i see 9 articles denying an embarassing sexual rumor, i'm gonna start to wonder if maybe there's something to it.

The 10th Man Principle: If nine of us look at the same information and arrive at the exact same conclusion, it is the duty of the 10th man to disagree no matter how improbable it may seem. The tenth man has to start investigating under the assumption the other nine are wrong.