this post was submitted on 10 Jan 2026
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Counterpoint: it’s super manly to just own it and not worry about how you look. Whether you do tiny laps like a cat or big ol’ slurps like a dog, having the confidence to just hydrate yourself and not care who’s watching is kinda sexy, ngl
this is why i twerk while drinking from a fountain, and when i'm done with water running down my chin and tongue drooping, i gently moan.
And I'm not twerking for anyone but myself! You can look, but don't touch the goods without permission.
Counter-counterpoint: if you, on the other hand, wrap your lips around the spigot while drinking -- you have exactly ten seconds to get the fuck out of my sight you absolute gremlin.
Go back to Eagleton
PAWNEE RULES
I BLAME EAGLETON FOR LIL SEBASTIAN!!!
Proper etiquette requires some degree of suction, which is also kinda sexy, ngl
But that is the most efficient use of the water!
Counter-counterpoint - this is clearly satire.
Also, yeah, nothing is more unmanly than caring about looking manly.