Alisu

joined 2 years ago
[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 7 points 16 hours ago

Busses, trams and subways all have their purpose, all three can be present in a city and it will be good

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 8 points 16 hours ago

And I only burned myself 2 times

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 8 points 17 hours ago (1 children)

I've been running the oven for 19 pizzas. I am awesome.

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 9 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

I am the greatest pizza maker in the world

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 13 points 1 day ago

Most people won't notice stuff if they are not looking for it.

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 13 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Currently freaking the fuck out bocchi-glitch

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 10 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Oh hell yeah, hope they grow as much as you want them. Sending good vibes.

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 2 points 2 days ago (1 children)

About voice training there's this post I saved a while back, very detailed, I thought it would be better than just posting the links, the user who posted it detailed some stuff well. These have helped me a lot, maybe you can make some progress too. Voice training is 100% possible, do not give up on it.

spoilerWell, making friends can be hard, making cool friends even harder, but it is so worth it, having someone calling you by your chosen name feels very good the first few times, even if they're online friends. You could try LGBT groups, or maybe try to get organized? I made a few very good friends at my org, but maybe just getting some online friends would already help, I barely see my friends so they're basically online friends.

Don't worry too much about being big, big women exist, with varying proportions. I'm on this boat too, to some extent, I'm tall, not that much, but my hands are really big. I'm sure you will find your body beautiful one day, when you can fully explore your expression of yourself. Including everything, clothing, make-up, nails, all of it.

I keep imagining moving out, having my stuff, fem clothes, being myself, as best as I can. This gets me through most sad days with hope.

Thank you for talking with me, I really appreciate it.

Don't worry about it, if you want someone to listen to you, don't be afraid to reach out.

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 9 points 2 days ago

Seems like the only option sometimes, but it's hard to get meds in some places

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 3 points 2 days ago (3 children)

spoilerI understand how painful it is. I'm mostly experiencing the same, except for a few friends I came out to, which really helped me a lot. I'm not currently working, but when I was, it was quite the same as you are describing. Idk how much support you have in your life, between friends, siblings and other relatives. But coming out to some people helped me a lot, if you can, try to get some support irl.

For voice, you have to train, there's no going around it. It's hard, not that hard, but it will take some effort, and consistent training (I can link a few resources I got from other users, if you'd like).

Changes from E will take time, unfortunately. But the way you dress and take care of yourself is just as important. If you dress with masc clothes, speak with a more masc voice, have a masc haircut, don't deal with facial hair in some way, most people won't register anything other than "men" and will not even think about it, hell, even other trans people won't realize.

I'm not sure why you are so focused on the T puberty, probably the majority of trans women have gone through it and they can just look like a woman too (I know a few stunningly beautiful ones). E will help, obviously. But you can also do other stuff to help, like change how you dress, learn how to do make-up, do skin-care, shave, paint your nails, do your eyebrows, and many many more things you can do. If that's not something you can do right now, then yeah, it is going to be harder to get treated as a woman by a random person, or someone you haven't come out to.

If the size thing is about height, there isn't that much to do besides accept that tall women are beautiful. If this is about weight and fat distribution, then the only thing I can recommend other than realizing women with bellies are beautiful, is to exercise and eat healthy. That way losing weight and redistributing fat from E will get you closer to what you want.

If there is some specific way you want to look like, it might be harder to get there, but I'm sure you can look how you want to. Remember, you are already a beautiful woman, the other people just haven't realized it yet.

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 10 points 2 days ago (2 children)

The doctors also actively try to not let you do it

[–] Alisu@hexbear.net 5 points 3 days ago

I want to look like this in my overall, but no boobs yet

 

I was going to illustrate the whole poem by Edgar Allan Poe, but since I wasn't able to do it, have the one drawing, and the poem itself. Keep in mind it is horror literature and has themes of grief and a haunting encounter with a raven.

The Raven CW: Grief, Horror

Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore, While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. “ ’Tis some visiter,” I muttered, “tapping at my chamber door — Only this, and nothing more.”

Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December, And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor. Eagerly I wished the morrow; — vainly I had tried to borrow From my books surcease of sorrow — sorrow for the lost Lenore —

For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore — Nameless here for evermore.

And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain Thrilled me — filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before; So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating “ ’Tis some visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door — Some late visiter entreating entrance at my chamber door; — This it is, and nothing more.”

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, “Sir,” said I, “or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping, And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, That I scarce was sure I heard you” — here I opened wide the door; — Darkness there, and nothing more.

Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before; But the silence was unbroken, and the darkness gave no token, And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, “Lenore!” This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, “Lenore!” Merely this, and nothing more.

Then into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning, Soon I heard again a tapping somewhat louder than before. “Surely,” said I, “surely that is something at my window lattice; Let me see, then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore — Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;— ’Tis the wind, and nothing more!”

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter, In there stepped a stately raven of the saintly days of yore; Not the least obeisance made he; not an instant stopped or stayed he; But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door — Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door — Perched, and sat, and nothing more.

Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling, By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore, “Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou,” I said, “art sure no craven, Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from the Nightly shore — Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night’s Plutonian shore!” Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”

Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly, Though its answer little meaning — little relevancy bore; For we cannot help agreeing that no sublunary being Ever yet was blessed with seeing bird above his chamber door — Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door, With such name as “Nevermore.”

But the raven, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour. Nothing farther then he uttered — not a feather then he fluttered — Till I scarcely more than muttered, “Other friends have flown before — On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before.” Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”

Wondering at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken, “Doubtless,” said I, “what it utters is its only stock and store, Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster Followed fast and followed faster — so, when Hope he would adjure, Stern Despair returned, instead of the sweet Hope he dared adjure — That sad answer, “Nevermore!”

But the raven still beguiling all my sad soul into smiling, Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird, and bust, and door; Then upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore — What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt, and ominous bird of yore Meant in croaking “Nevermore.”

This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom’s core; This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining On the cushion’s velvet lining that the lamplight gloated o’er, But whose velvet violet lining with the lamplight gloating o’er, She shall press, ah, nevermore!

Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer Swung by angels whose faint foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor. “Wretch,” I cried, “thy God hath lent thee — by these angels he hath sent thee Respite — respite and Nepenthe from thy memories of Lenore! Let me quaff this kind Nepenthe and forget this lost Lenore!” Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”

“Prophet!” said I, “thing of evil! — prophet still, if bird or devil! — Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore, Desolate, yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted — On this home by Horror haunted — tell me truly, I implore — Is there — is there balm in Gilead? — tell me — tell me, I implore!” Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”

“Prophet!” said I, “thing of evil! — prophet still, if bird or devil! By that Heaven that bends above us — by that God we both adore — Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn, It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels name Lenore — Clasp a rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore.” Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”

“Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!” I shrieked, upstarting — “Get thee back into the tempest and the Night’s Plutonian shore! Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken! — quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!” Quoth the raven, “Nevermore.”

And the raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door; And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon that is dreaming, And the lamp-light o’er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor; And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor Shall be lifted — nevermore!


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As a reminder, please do not discuss current struggle sessions in the mega. We want this to be a little oasis for all of us and the best way to do that is not to feed into existing conflict on the site.

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So that you can be professionally told to log off, get some sun on your skin and some grass on your hands

 

Beanis tshirt doesn't count, libs have bad taste and are like "eeeew i hate beanis" so it doesn't sell

 

Yeah, I'm making pizza, anyone wants a slice?

 

 

I'm worrying a bit about b12 levels, so I thought I'd ask here. From what I gathered searching the internet some morning cereals and some things that have added b12, there was a site talking about soy milk, but idk about that. I'm looking for more options so i could maybe find them more easily

 

Seriously, I wanna go begone every time I read some carrer growth opportunity bullshit. It's either a job or it isn't.

I really despise anything remotely related to linkedin or whatever kind of creature dwells in that place. Can everyone do this stuff? Like, is this really how everyone gets a job? I can't deal with all this pretending, everything requires having a linkedin profile, but not only that, you gotta sell yourself somehow. And I don't even use social media.

Well, I have a bachelor's degree from a good University, I'm good at what I do, here's a portfolio. But no, I have to prove I deserve to be selected as a producer of wealth for my potential boss by pretending to be someone else. Can't we all just be practical about this shit? I have to keep trying to put myself into boxes and trying to fit with a sort of profile that I just can't and don't know why.

Am I autistic? Like, do I go get a diagnosis and maybe that will help? Do I go do something on my own? Then I have to figure out what an then sell it, and I'm bad at that. I don't know what to do and I'm tired of trying. (I was almost crying while writing this paragraph).

Honestly though, I just wanted to rant and this is one of the few places I feel safer in. Thanks for reading my angery rambling

 

Comunas lindos do meu coração, vamos conversar em línguas mais bonitas

 

X, formerly known as Twitter, has said it expects to be blocked in Brazil after failing to meet a deadline to name a new legal representative for the company.

The social media network closed its office in the country earlier this month, saying its representative had been threatened with arrest if she did not comply with orders it described as "censorship".

The months-long row began with Supreme Court Judge Alexandre de Moraes in April ordering the suspension of dozens of X accounts for allegedly spreading disinformation.

X owner Elon Musk has threatened to reactivate the accounts, and has described Justice Moraes as a "tyrant" and a "dictator".

"Soon, we expect Judge Alexandre de Moraes will order X to be shut down in Brazil – simply because we would not comply with his illegal orders to censor his political opponents," the post said.

"hey, so we want you to ban these fake news spam accounts"

frothingfash "DICTATOR! TYRANT! STOP CENSORING FASCISM!!"

After melon-musk fighting in twitter with one of the supreme court judges, he's facing the consequences of his actions. I hope twitter is banned from every country

 

I've been curious about this and can't seem to find a good source on search engines, it's all wikipedia and human rights watch or some stuff like that. Tried looking for some dprk news sources (I wanted ones actually from Korea), but got only propaganda from the US or occupied korea.

 

Seriously, I wanna fucking leave my house every fucking day. They work everyday, all day and are exploited for their work, have bad health that they have no time to take care of and are so devoted to defending millionaires for "creating jobs" that they cannot accept that what creates value is labour. They hate the government and see it as bad, I agree, the bourgeois democracy is terrible, but when I say that, they don't believe in it. State owned equals inherently bad, seriously, its so hard to see the truth and ALMOST EVERYONE around you is a chud, a lib or at best a soc dem. And thank god for soc dems here, because at least they aren't anti-communist, at least some of them. Every fucking time I have to argue with a lib, I want to organize harder

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