As a viewpoint that ISN'T AI slop, go with the cheapest dry sparkling white you can handle. And, use it INSTEAD of milk, not with it, because carbonation makes things sour, and sour milk is spoiled milk. It won't taste good. Also, for your own health, PLEASE, I'm BEGGING YOU, do something nonalcoholic.
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"Sour milk is spoiled milk" may I introduce you to... YOGURT! Oh wait, that is technically spoiled...
use jt instead of milk
I once did this with Baileys. It was such a good idea in theory. In reality my Xmas morning was ruined and it took nearly an hour to eat the full bowl because momma didny raise no quitters.
Properly grim though i do not recommend.
Fuck AI
Posting AI slop in shitpost. Well done mate.
Some other suggestions:
- Corn Pops, Honeycomb - Chardonnay
- Frosted Flakes - Champagne
- Rice Krispies - Sauvignon Blanc
- Count Chocula - Port
- Oatmeal - Beer
- Grape Nuts - Whiskey
Grape Nuts, whiskey, and a Marlboro Red
Grape nuts, Winstons, and Scotch whiskey describes my dad on the weekends.
I feel like this might have been a real ad when i was a kid
Me too. There was a cowboy if memory serves me right.
How my grandfather lived to be 94
(kidding they all had massive strokes in their 50s)
One of mine lived on that until he died at 95.
The other didn’t smoke and got a cool sword in Germany for a carton in ‘45. He lived to 97.
My uncle Bob was an aircraft mechanic who skipped the Grape Nuts and crushed my hand for fun died happy at 89.
Optimizing for duration is not a reliable measure of glory.
Part of a clinically approved balanced breakfast!
Didn't burn anywhere near as much water and co2 for those suggestions either.
15+ years in the wine industry gives a man certain skills... and I've earned each one of those bullet points with my blood, sweat and puke over the years.
Plus, we can go deeper...
- Twinkies - Prosecco
- Apple Fritters - Mead
- HoHos - Cabernet Sauvignon
- Ding Dongs - Merlot
- Basic Glazed Donut - Sherry
Without knowing apple fritters, wouldn't a cider pair more naturally?
Okay, I'm going to have to find somewhere that sells mead for next time I get an apple fritter
These are great suggestions. Definitely gonna try the sherry glazed!
Chardonnay isn’t usually vinified sweet enough, sadly, to stand up to Corn Pops and Honeycomb. There probably is one, somewhere, but it’s a reach. You’d really want Sauternes or Tokaji Aszu. They’re produced from grapes infected with a rot that gives them honey flavor notes.
Champagne and Port I like. Rice Crispies I’m curious about. Why and from where?
I chose Chard because most are buttery, and which compliments the buttery corn of Corn Pops and the honey in Honeycomb. Didn't think about the botrytis wines at all tbh - they're in a class of their own. Thinking high-end granola with lots of fruit there.
Jokes aside, we italians do actually drink Moscato d'Asti with cakes or pastry on good occasions. It's not a regular wine, it's a highly sweet one, which we drink either alongside another sweet food (again, cakes, pastry, sometimes even Pandoro, but it's much less common with Panettone), or alone.
(Certainly not with Cap'n Crunch tho, but if that's your thing, Moscato d'Asti is the one)
Not sure how you can drink that grape. "Highly sweet" is mega underselling how sickeningly sweet it is.
I don't know if that clears it, but you don't chug it, you sip it.
I like moscato.
Manischewitz Concord wine is sickeningly sweet though. The only reason people drink that is TRADITION.
Not sure I like pairing Moscato. It leans very heavily into stone fruit rather than into the berries and cream in Oops All Berries. I like Prosecco better. It can be a bit nutty.
For me, personally, ideally I want something with some lees aging. That often gets into rich, bready flavors. So a demi sec Champagne or Cremant would work. A rose Cremant d’Alsace maybe even?
Edit: Also Sherry.
Prosecco is always delicious. I down that shit like a middle aged soccer mom trying to forget she has kids.
Is this more of the literal shitposting? Because drinking alcohol with milk will give you intense diarrhea.
*Lol, I think I actually can't handle fat all that well and misremembering teenage experiments. What an enlightening comment. >.>
I never got diarrhea drinking white russians which are literally alcohol mixed with milk or cream. If you're lactose intolerant, the dairy by itself could give you intense diarrhea tho.
Not too intense... Many-a cocktails contain cream.
Ah, like Baileys. I always thought the milk was treated, or the curds removed after addition or something. Can't really do that if it's already in stomach tho.
Bailey's and cream liquors are probably processed. I was thinking more along the likes of a white russian (coffee cream liquor, vodka, cream). To tell you the truth, that's the only creamy cocktail I know from the top of my head, so it might not be as popular as I made it out in my first comment.
edit: And because we're talking about Bailey's, I couldn't help but invite Old Greg.
Ever drink Baileys out of a shoe?
Only at clubs where people wee on each other.
Do you like watercolors?
Grasshopper, mudslide, and brandy alexander off the top of my head. I’ve seen a lot of boozey milkshakes too
Clarified milk drinks start with milk … but then go through chemistry and filtering to remove the milky parts of the milk…
It will? Why do wine and cheese with so well together? I've had cream in certain drinks before and not had a problem. And cheese with pretty much everything, beer and nachos, yum
I was misremembering teenage experiments.
43 con leche is a popular drink in Spain, it's literally a milk-based long drink. I don't think it would be as popular as it is if everyone got diarrhea from it. Could be pushing it if you're drinking those all evening, though.
White Russian says Hi
Dairy and wine will lead to a very shitty outcome. Exquisite shit post.
the booze is the “oops”