I'm not buying this. There's no way in hell this fat orange pile of blubber fits in this.

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I'm not buying this. There's no way in hell this fat orange pile of blubber fits in this.

It's something more like this:

These aren't the actual ones used but the photo in the article only shows one from the back.
That still seems like a tight squeeze for his fat ass. Maybe with some lube.
I thought the same thing, but it was an airport catering cart, not an airplane catering cart. I assume that means the big thing those little things are loaded onto.
I mean... we could make him fit...
Yeah this fat ass ain't a contortionist
I'm imagining this was a prank they played on him, like yo they gonna kill you hide in this thing right here go go go
It might if you used a blender.
Fat chance. He's quite the fatso. Even in liquid form, he would probably overflow.
I still think it's worth trying, just to be sure, you know.
I have no doubt this is what we were intended to imagine, so we'd click on the link.
So that means they must have thought Iran would shoot his plane down. I guess they considered the poor suckers flying on the Air Force One expendable. I wonder if anyone told them about it.
edit: Oh, per the article the answer is No, of course they didn't:
On this occasion, the journalists who thought they were traveling with Trump on the older Air Force One reported being advised to keep their window shades in the press cabin closed. The Post said aside from reporters, some White House staff also believed the president was on board.
When asked later by reporters why they had to keep their shades shut during the flight, Trump said it was because they were “probably on a dangerous flight”. He went onto say: “But if I go, you go. Right?”
too bad they didn't just lock the cart and leave it on the hot tarmac for a couple weeks...
At least the stench wouldn't change
So the US presidential plane, operated and supported by the best-funded and most technologically advanced air force in the world, isn't safe from Iranian missiles?
It's not the sort of thing an administration would admit to, if that administration actually had American geopolitical interests at heart.
This. They just said AF1 is not as safe and secure as we've been told. Even if it's not true and it's actually more secure than we're led to believe, his cowardice just put doubt in the minds of everyone, including the quickly growing list of enemies. And that doubt puts the aircraft and everyone on board in danger going forward.
That cart should be labeled as hazardous material from now on.
What a little bitch.
And then all the staffers and press got on the plane he thought was being targeted. Fucking coward.
OMG, we cannot let this man become a martyr. If that means shoving him into a catering cart, then so be it.
It's a gloomy thought, but: No matter what happens to him, he will be a martyr to many, and there's precious little we can do about it.
I hope nearly every outlet starts calling him the worst President in history and just makes that canon. Constant drum beat: "worst President in history, Donald Trump..."
I sure hope the Murc's Law media does not try to Ronnie Raygunize this monster. They should just repeat the mantra "worst President in history" as if it's commonly accepted, just like they often did about Carter ever after he left office, but in this case, it would be far more accurate.
It'd be even better if he were alive to see it and had no FCC to try to squash the media. :) Remember how the right just melted right the fuck down when they'd hear the phrase "former President Trump" during Biden's presidency? I really don't know how they expected the media to label him, but imagine if they start accurately characterizing him, too.
My instinct is that the non-rightwing-shill media are never going to be loud and dumb enough to reach his fans, to change the currents set up by the loud and dumb rightwing-shill media outlets.
We would need every news outlet, every pundit, every talking head on the internet to tie him to his failures in a radically simplistic, one-sided, emotional way, 24/7, over and over again for years:
"trump interferes with vaccines for children; why does trump hate America so much?"
"trump wrecks international shipping with outburst of violence; why does trump hate America so much?"
"trump covers up food contamination for political donors; why does trump hate America so much?"
"trump sabotages American farmers with (tariffs / parasites); why does trump hate America so much?"
"trump sabotages American military with (disease / shortages / ridiculous deployment requirements); why does trump hate America so much?"
I'm doubtful that this will be possible.
I bet we'd all be ready to pay the martyr cost this one time. Cheerfully, even.
What? The strongest, smartest, and most fearless president we've ever had hiding in a catering truck? Say it's not so.
Clever if true, but this trick only works once, and now it's out in the open.
All nations contemplating assassinations now:
Noted. If attempting to take out a leader-in-transit, don't just target the Presidential/Royal plane, target the support aircraft and any others that might exchange 'catering carts' on the tarmac as well, in case Dear Leader is stowing away on one of those.
Hope they cleaned it out really well afterward. That's the type of smell that transfers and lingers.
If you read the article they had to burn the cargo hold after because smell of spray-on bronzer and shit was so strong.
probably had to burn the entire airport.
What an Alpha Male move
Sounds like him. Like most bullies, he's strong on the bravado and weak on the bravery.
Clown
I wonder how often so-called "normal" world leaders pull Keystone Cops bullshit like this. Seems like the kind of thing you only resort to if things are already going very poorly / stupidly, but it has to happen from time to time. I'm sure the secret service has done some truly wacky capers that have never seen the light of day.
Hey! I just landed and my president was not in the carousel! I think you guys lost my president! I want to speak to your manager!
Man, I bet that cart smelled baaaaaaaad.
~~fart~~ shart cart
Staffers opening it up like

tTump is fat bitch that shits his pants constantly and was Epsteins best buddy, they raped children together.
Fucking coward.

How did his fat ass even fit?
they probably just told him it was for security, but wanted to contain his pants-shitting smell so people could breathe. I bet the crew of both planes and the press pool were ecstatic.
Meanwhile at home he has army avenger (AA) vehicles on his golf greens just in case.
You'd think someone so near the end would just accept it.
Chicken or pasta? Chicken.
I love that for him.

Why the fuck did they let that pussy out.