this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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[–] uriel238@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 days ago

Liz Cheney being president is not a positive. Non-whites and LGBT+ folk are still fighting for their rights and to get representation. No-bid government contracts are going to big construction and big military instead of big tech. Social programs are still gutted and dying or dead. Big religion dominates education. We're still locked in a war in the Middle East or Asia. The world is still burning while the federal government still refuses to regulate big polluters.

[–] LodeMike@lemmy.today 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Donald trump isn't making it to 95

[–] iocase@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 day ago

He might die before his term is up. The ultimate boomer "fuck you got mine"

[–] superweeniehutjrs@lemmy.world 83 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Privatized social security?

[–] musubibreakfast@lemmy.world 29 points 3 days ago (1 children)

You rent each number on your ssn individually, if you miss a payment then you lose a random number. When you only have 1 number left you get sent to an island where you have to kill 8 people. For every person killed you get their respective number, if you manage to kill 8 then your new ssn is composed out of their numbers.

If your new ssn is a duplicate of an existing number then a duel is arranged between you and the existing holder of said number unless either party pays the ssn company 9 million dollars for a new number.

Yes, and everyone can look up used and empty SSN, so you know what numbers other random island people could be looking for.

The bad guy isn't the government though, it's some random guy that keeps abducting other people instead of killing them, and lets other people get the kill to avoid the 9 mill/duel scenario

The main character is super fine with all of this for some reason, and ends up killing the number cuck, but that's the main characters last number. Main character ends up with the same number as the president of the United States, who for some reason doesn't use the buyout option, probably because he's an asshole.

[–] schildfrosch@feddit.org 2 points 1 day ago

i belive this could be what is often called "satire" or "rage bait"

[–] Almacca@aussie.zone 59 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Right? Wtf? Also, Liz Cheney as president would be no picnic either.

This is neo-liberal ideals. It's terrible because neo-liberalism itself is terrible.

[–] terranoid@lemmy.cafe 5 points 3 days ago

Like health insurance i guess

[–] IAMgROOT@lemmy.wtf 34 points 3 days ago (2 children)

"social security has been privatized"

dems😭😭😭

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Yeah that's the odd one out isn't it.

[–] __Lost__@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Did you not notice Liz Cheney?

[–] Obi@sopuli.xyz 7 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Who? Sorry I'm not American.

[–] Samsy@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Not American, too. Maybe the daughter of Dick Cheney?

[–] Burninator05@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

She is the daughter of Dick Cheney. She was a member of the House of Representatives (the US lower house) from Wyoming. She is a Republican (US right leaning political party) but kinda grew away from MAGA and became anti-Trump. She lost her election because of that. While she isn't as bat-shit insane as a lot of Republicans , she is still a Republican.

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[–] Carmakazi@piefed.social 52 points 3 days ago (4 children)

Donald Trump is not living until 2035 under any circumstance, unless we symbolically hold his bloated corpse in a supermax.

[–] gex@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

In 2030 his consciousness is extracted and preserved as a neural network by Peter Thiel in a desperate attempt to control the maga movement. In 2033 it is seized by the FBI, uploaded into a SpaceX orbital data center and locked in geostationary orbit, guaranteeing operation for the next 10,000 years.

It explodes on the launchpad

[–] jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

If we left his remains in the wilderness to be consumed by scavangers, it would probably be his most positive contribution to the world.

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[–] dan1101@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

Brick it shut and let him rot, it's better than he deserves after all he has done.

[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago (3 children)

I started asking this a few years ago to people as kind of a joke, but it's less of a joke now:

At what age of Trump still being alive will you go "wait a second..." and start to suspect there is a drug or treatment that the elite have access to that extends their life that they aren't telling the public about?

I don't mean better access to higher quality medical care. I don't mean a personal team of doctors. I mean a drug or treatment that can extend lifespans by decades, even for those who live unhealthy lifestyles.

[–] Mirshe@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

See, here's the thing, we would've heard about it. Trump and all his ilk can't keep their fucking mouths shut and would've been lording this shit over us. Someone would've said SOMETHING, because none of these people can keep a secret.

[–] I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

Ok, sure. But I want you to answer that question. At what age will you start being suspicious? I want you to have a number in your head, so that when that time comes, you don't ignore it.

[–] fake@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 days ago

You really think he could keep his mouth shut about it?

[–] DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world 14 points 3 days ago

WTF? Stupid fucking neoliberals.

[–] socsa@piefed.social 13 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 3 points 3 days ago

tips fedora

[–] wagesj45@fedia.io 27 points 3 days ago (1 children)

So many people seem to have missed that this is the shitpost magazine.

[–] DupaCycki@lemmy.world 12 points 3 days ago

There's a difference between a good shitpost, and a nornalpost that is shit. Learn the art, practice the craft.

[–] KraeuterRoy@feddit.org 15 points 3 days ago

The Fall of Japan is a bit of a surprise

[–] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 6 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I like those style of lights. If I ever find some cheap enough, I'm going to string them up in my living room and have a picnic.

[–] Kattiydid@slrpnk.net 2 points 2 days ago

They were at Costco for 30 bucks when I was there last week

[–] andyburke@fedia.io 20 points 3 days ago

If Liz Cheney, daughter of shotgun Dicky, is president the US is well and truly fuckin' cooked.

The Overton needs a fucking reset or something. tf is this?

[–] Garbagio@lemmy.zip 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] P1k1e@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

stabs rib "Woops" stabs eye "Damnit hang on" stabs foot "How did that even!?"

[–] Reygle@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

That was a nice warm feeling for a minute, thanks for that. Ope, gotta get back to my hellscape of a life again thanks for that byyyyeee

[–] yilian@sopuli.xyz 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

If he lives another nine years I’ll eat my hat.

[–] EtAl@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago

He's got weeks. A few months at most.

[–] notsosure@sh.itjust.works 11 points 3 days ago

“And this photo was taken at the south pole visiting center”

[–] TheDemonBuer@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The liberal dream. (I use liberal in the classical sense. Here in the US - where people don't know what words mean - instead of "liberal" folks here might refer to them as "centrists," "moderates" or "neoliberals." Interesting that neoliberals are not liberals here in the US, even though "liberal" is IN THE DAMN NAME!)

[–] SGforce@lemmy.ca 15 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Why don't we just call a politician by how they act and not by what ideology they pretend to have?

[–] DagwoodIII@piefed.social 17 points 3 days ago

This.

There are billionaires in the Chinese Communist Party. North Korea calls itself a 'democratic republic.' The Reddest US states are also the ones taking the most money from the Federal government.

Any discussion of political labels outside a classroom is folly.

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[–] webpack@ani.social 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

n then we lwk get cooked by climate change

[–] UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

At the rate we're going, we might obliterate a significant portion of our fossil fuel economy before that happens.

[–] roserose56@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

You wish, look Donald Trump winning the next rigged election and the USA citizens posting more slop politics.

[–] Photonic@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

That motherfucker still alive?

[–] PointyFluff@lemmy.ml 1 points 3 days ago

You've misspelled "EXECUTED"

[–] lastlybutfirstly@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

My problem with this future is that it doesn't look like people use proper punctuation and stroked lettering to make it easier to read text plastered across a busy background.

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