this post was submitted on 10 Jun 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 45 comments
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By the gods, finally.

[โ€“] hank_the_tank66@lemmy.world 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I'm having a baby in an hour or so. Hope this is true ๐Ÿคž

[โ€“] Allero@lemmy.today 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Wish you an easy birth! Come back to tell how you and your kid are doing ๐Ÿ˜Š

[โ€“] hank_the_tank66@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

We're all good! Way better experience than an emergency C-section for our first. He sounds like a Hyena and has likely earned that as his first nickname

[โ€“] Allero@lemmy.today 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Congrats! That is, unless you gave birth to a gnoll, but that normally works the other way around

[โ€“] hank_the_tank66@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago (2 children)

He is exhibiting goblin-like tendencies, but we will try to raise him as a human child

[โ€“] boonhet@sopuli.xyz 1 points 2 days ago

Sounds like his mom was consuming whatever material GPT 5 was trained off of.

Also bad news is, despite all my attempts at indoctrination, my goblin still doesn't act like a human being most of the time at age 2. It's been interesting.

[โ€“] Allero@lemmy.today 1 points 2 days ago

Haha

He's in the good hands!

[โ€“] Frenchgeek@lemmy.ml 16 points 3 days ago (2 children)

That was a load-bearing curse, you know...

[โ€“] Aneb@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Now my entire personality is fucked. Is there a place to get new curse?

[โ€“] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Dammit, now I need to find another capybara!

..wait... Yay! Now I need to find another capybara!

[โ€“] gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org 3 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

that's what i tell all my patients. i could un-curse them in a moment, but that's bad because lots of curses are actually load-bearing, especially if they've been there for a long time. you gotta remove them slowly, give the healthy tissue a chance to fill up that hole.

aw fuck nothing changed, that must mean my shitty sleep schedule and general malaise are not a curse but are in fact the consequences of my own choices

Great news, thanks

[โ€“] daggermoon@piefed.world 4 points 2 days ago

Thanks capybara!

[โ€“] ceenote@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Checks the news

I don't think one capybara will be enough.

[โ€“] leagman1@feddit.org 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Who would win, 1000 capybaras or 1 sleepy old man.

[โ€“] Aneb@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Is the 1 sleepy old man at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave? Can we ship 1000 capybaras and see?

[โ€“] DisasterTransport@startrek.website 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[โ€“] Aneb@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

Basically animal abuse I know. But 100 capybaras or 350 million Americans, and other countries suffering because of the shit in the oval office

[โ€“] Pudutr0n@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago
[โ€“] mgrecca2026@lemmy.zip 3 points 2 days ago

i feel liberated here

looks at this

looks at chicken uncurse from a couple weeks ago

Motherfucker did I get cursed again?? What the hell did I do??

Appreciate the save though, lil' magical capybara.

[โ€“] expatriado@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

capybaras are fresh water creatures, so pic is a bit cursed already

Capybara has a right to have one day at the beach. It works very hard at being a capybara.

[โ€“] hansolo@lemmy.today 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Holy shit, I've been having the worst day in forever.

Everything broken, everyone with answers gone, rules and problems. Made my partner and I fight - in front of the cat. for shaaaame

Thanks, yo.

Curse, ya done. Kindly fuck right off.

No worries, the cat understands and still loves you both.

[โ€“] fne8w2ah@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

Well thanks for the good vibes.

[โ€“] Waraugh@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 3 days ago

Nice, I get to play the game again

[โ€“] underscores@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 days ago

holy fuck thank you capybara of the southern beaches

[โ€“] Obnomus@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 days ago

Thanks same to you.

[โ€“] Furbag@pawb.social 2 points 3 days ago

Thank Mr. Capibar

Appreciate the effort, but it didn't work :(

[โ€“] HeHoXa@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

Huh weird, a post that uninsta-

[โ€“] Smaile@lemmy.ca 1 points 3 days ago

i still feel cursed, do it again T.T

[โ€“] Formfiller@lemmy.world 1 points 3 days ago
[โ€“] vrek@programming.dev 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I curse you again.. I just like chaos... And didn't get enough hugs as a child

[โ€“] Allero@lemmy.today 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

No problem, gonna look at the pic again

[โ€“] vrek@programming.dev 1 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Now we are just staring at a picture together... Can we hug?

[โ€“] Allero@lemmy.today 1 points 3 days ago

Always, friend

Cappy "The White Witch" Bara