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We live in a society (startrek.website)
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[-] AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 110 points 6 months ago

Why don't they have Wi-Fi in Church?

!They don't want to compete with an invisible power that actually does something!<

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[-] TheAuthor_13@lemm.ee 76 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Except Panera’s not even in the same league when it comes to completely unnecessary deaths… religion/ church has millennia & millions up on Panera.

Edit: Panera also has far less sweaty-palmed, Father Feelgood kiddie-diddling accusations as well.

[-] 567PrimeMover@kbin.social 30 points 6 months ago

Panera's doing their best! It's hard to compete when the other guy has a head start that spans basically all of recorded history

[-] GBU_28@lemm.ee 11 points 6 months ago

Let them cook

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[-] TheJims@lemmy.world 40 points 6 months ago

Ok but I’m still not going to church

[-] afraid_of_zombies@lemmy.world 39 points 6 months ago

You know what? That death lemonade isnt going to rape your kid so it is still better than church.

[-] cosmicrose@lemmy.world 37 points 6 months ago

I get a tasty lemonade, AND I get to die??? Sign me up!!

[-] Cqrd@lemmy.dbzer0.com 10 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

I haven't tried it, but I heard it's not actually that great. Though that one person who died had three of them, so what do I know

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[-] fl42v@lemmy.ml 9 points 6 months ago

Well, you get to die anyways, so that's lemonade && 1 = lemonade

[-] Erasmus@lemmy.world 36 points 6 months ago

How many people have died because of organized religion vs. Panera charged lemonade.

[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 10 points 6 months ago

The entire world+ vs like, 3?

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[-] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.one 33 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Hi there, just dropping in to say that caffeine is more dangerous than cannabis

flies away

Edit:

Anti-weed Puritans trying to find ways weed is actually harmful

Harry J. Anslinger looking up from hell

[-] xintrik@lemm.ee 21 points 6 months ago

Meth is more dangerous than caffeine

shoots away

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[-] jaschen@lemm.ee 31 points 6 months ago

To be fair, the church had killed more people than literally anything.

[-] Skipper_the_Eyechild@lemmings.world 18 points 6 months ago

Mosquitoes would probably beat them, but they've had a hefty head start. The church are aware of this, of course, which is why they double down on the paedophilia to catch up.

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[-] son_named_bort@lemmy.world 30 points 6 months ago

I don't blame people for not going to church. They don't even give you wine anymore, just grape juice. Jesus drank wine, why can't I?

[-] Baphomet_The_Blasphemer@lemmy.world 14 points 6 months ago

I thought Jesus was wine or something like that? I've never participated in Christianity's cannibalistic rituals though, so I'm sure I'm a bit confused.

[-] funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 12 points 6 months ago

the wine only becomes Jesus' blood in your tummy unless you have an operation or autopsy then it turns back into wine just in the nick of time, apparently.

[-] HowdWeGetHereAnyways@lemmy.world 7 points 6 months ago

It's only cannibalism if you believe you are the same as God.

Arise, God-drinkers.

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[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 29 points 6 months ago
[-] Wogi@lemmy.world 29 points 6 months ago

No no, let's hear the lemonade out

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 14 points 6 months ago

Okay, but if Panera starts playing bad rock songs in praise of their lemonade, I'm leaving.

[-] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 7 points 6 months ago* (last edited 6 months ago)

Its more likely than you think. Waffle house has a music label.

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[-] norgur@discuss.tchncs.de 24 points 6 months ago

So I either have to die from needlessly over caffeinated soft drinks or deliver my own son to a molestation orgy club? What fucked up kind of choice is that?!

[-] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 21 points 6 months ago

To be fair though, church is many times more deadly and 0% delicious 🤷

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[-] Blackmist@feddit.uk 18 points 6 months ago

Fuck knows what church has got to do with anything.

[-] byroon@lemmy.world 16 points 6 months ago

I must be out of the loop. What's church?

[-] Steve@startrek.website 14 points 6 months ago

Random caffeine overdoses are preferable to repeated genocide…

[-] Socsa@sh.itjust.works 13 points 6 months ago

Don't threaten me with a good time Panera

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[-] ComicalMayhem@lemmy.world 11 points 6 months ago
[-] The_Picard_Maneuver@startrek.website 29 points 6 months ago

Panera has been selling some sort of lemonade with a ton of caffeine, and there have been a couple of news stories recently about it killing people.

It sounds like people aren't aware that "charged lemonade" has caffeine at all when they order it. Or maybe they realize it but aren't expecting 260-390mg.

[-] rug_burn@sh.itjust.works 23 points 6 months ago

Holy fuck where has this lemonade been my whole life???!?!?!

If you never see me post again, tell my mom I loved her!

[-] skulblaka@kbin.social 27 points 6 months ago

"This lemonade has been actively killing people with caffeine overdose"

@rug_burn : man I gotta get me some of this stuff

[-] pelotron@midwest.social 7 points 6 months ago

Based low caffeine tolerance

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[-] WashedOver@lemmy.ca 14 points 6 months ago

Fck. That seems like it's way more than your typical energy drink that's off the charts too.

I would love to know how that product development meeting went. "Hey people, we have this idea, think lemonade and coffee, but like 10 cups of coffee in a single lemonade.

It's like being kicked in the chest by a horse. It could kill some people and open us up to litigation, but man are the sales going to be way up there too!"

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[-] Zoidsberg@lemmy.ca 10 points 6 months ago

For context, the energy drink sitting next to me has 160mg of caffeine.

[-] RTRedreovic@feddit.ch 8 points 6 months ago

For anyone concerned about their beverages. Following is a table of Recommended maximum daily intake of caffeine according to different age groups & categories: https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/food-nutrition/food-safety/food-additives/caffeine-foods.html

FDA's recommendations: https://www.fda.gov/consumers/consumer-updates/spilling-beans-how-much-caffeine-too-much

For measure: 8 oz (227 g) of Coffee has 80-100 mg of caffeine or 35-45 mg of Caffeine per 100 g of Coffee. (Average, numbers may vary accordingly.)

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[-] Pyr_Pressure@lemmy.ca 6 points 6 months ago

I think at least one case where a death occured they had like 3 or 4 of them

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I'LL TAKE 5

[-] rug_burn@sh.itjust.works 7 points 6 months ago

Reminds me of this, and why you can't easily get powdered caffeine anymore;

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/powdered-caffeine-death-fda-legal-action/

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this post was submitted on 11 Dec 2023
607 points (91.4% liked)

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