this post was submitted on 05 Dec 2025
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[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 32 points 1 month ago (1 children)

/r/nottheonion

Excuse me, a toilet camera‽

[–] asudox@lemmy.asudox.dev 1 points 3 weeks ago

!nottheonion@lemmy.world

[–] Blackmist@feddit.uk 28 points 1 month ago (2 children)

What a waste of money.

I just upload videos of me shitting directly to German porn sites, and then read the comments to see if I have anything to worry about.

[–] itea@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 month ago
[–] pigup@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

I can't read German tho

[–] MagicShel@lemmy.zip 26 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (5 children)

I mean, it is encrypted between their end and your... uh... end. Just not encrypted at their end.

I wonder who has to review the logs. That would be a shit job.

[–] BertramDitore@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Heh logs.

You fixed my crappy morning, much appreciated.

[–] muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works 0 points 1 month ago
[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

They train their AI with it. 22998110

[–] dan@upvote.au 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

It is encrypted at their end - they say the data is encrypted both in transit and at rest.

However, it's not end-to-end encrypted, in the usual meaning of the term. E2EE usually means that only the sender and intended recipients of the data can decrypt the it, not the company running the service, their affiliates, or any intermediaries.

[–] EndlessNightmare@reddthat.com 2 points 1 month ago

End-to-End? More like ass-to-ass

[–] toiletobserver@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

So, many, puns...

[–] medem@lemmy.wtf 24 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Toilet cameras. Every time I think to myself that humanity's intellectual capacity has hit a new low, reality proves me wrong.

[–] madcaesar@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

🤣 Equally as dumb was a while back some wifi bed that refused to expand or collapse or something without internet, so people couldn't sleep on it while the sever was down

[–] medem@lemmy.wtf 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Sounds familiar: didn't the AWS outage last month also nuke 3,000+ USD 'smart beds'?

[–] A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I remember when cameras in toilets were a thing that women lived in fear of, especially in public toilets.

Now its a thing we're buying from corporations to give them HD live stream of the same thing.

[–] A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world 23 points 1 month ago (3 children)

What kind of lunatic is gonna buy an online enabled toilet camera to monitor their shits?

[–] Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Just wait for Law enforcement to get access to it. You know its coming.

"This shit has nuts in it. says the prosecution. Proving that they did not have a nut allergy. The prosecution rests."

[–] toynbee@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

What kind of lunatic is going to covertly monitor someone else's shits?

[–] HertzDentalBar@lemmy.blahaj.zone -1 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Well if I was getting paid I'd probably do it for passive income.

[–] nickiwest@lemmy.world 4 points 1 month ago

The article indicates that there's a monthly fee for the "service." So it's not a passive income situation.

[–] antonim@lemmy.dbzer0.com 18 points 1 month ago (1 children)

And the privacy policy states data may be used “To create aggregated, de-identified and/or anonymized data, which we may use and share with third parties for our lawful business purposes, including to analyze and improve the Kohler Health Platform and our other products and services, to promote our business, and to train our AI and machine learning models.”

They're literally using people's shitting and pissing to train AI.

But isn't AI already shitty enough by itself??

There might be a world, after we've pulled the last billionaire's lungs out, when humans are back in control, that we can do research into defecating video that can identify bowel cancer just by letting a computer watch someone take a dump.

We do not yet live in this world though.

[–] northernlights@lemmy.today 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

ah, "end-to-end encrypted" meaning the transport is encrypted, but data in storage is not. Or it is with a hardcoded key everybody who ever worked in IT there knows. Classic.

Kudos to whoever approved a freaking camera on a toilet. I would like to know the name of their drug dealer.

[–] INHALE_VEGETABLES@aussie.zone 5 points 1 month ago

More like end to end enshition, amirite?!

https://youtu.be/m-wILIEKWps

[–] billwashere@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

I’ve said this before…

toilet. camera.

ummm… no thanks

[–] Fit_Series_573@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Toliet camera....for $600 camera with a monthly subscription..... might as well just go to a doctor weekly with stool samples if you care this much about your rectal health. I can't see this being popular outside of a very niche group of patients that need it

[–] athairmor@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

I don’t think anybody needs this. Hypochondriacs are the only market I can see.

[–] Hawke@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I remember when toilet cameras were illegal and only on porn sites.

Guess everything changes when there’s money to be made.

[–] muusemuuse@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 month ago

Oh there was money to be made there too. Just by the wrong people.

[–] givesomefucks@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

You know the only thing more ridiculous than buying a toilet with a built in camera?

In October Kohler launched Dekota, a $600 (plus monthly subscription) device that attaches to the rim of your toilet and collects images and data from inside

Buying a camera to attach to an existing toilet, that has a monthly device fee that costs more than a fucking toilet does.

[–] ilinamorato@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Walking into a meeting at Kohler and keeping a straight face after saying the words "toilet camera"--and then maintaining that straight face throughout the product's discussion, greenlighting, development, manufacture, and sale--deserves an Oscar.

[–] stephey@programming.dev 5 points 1 month ago

By "End-to-End" encrypted, they were meaning the food.

~sigh~

[–] phutatorius@lemmy.zip 1 points 1 month ago

"End-to-end encrypted using the time-tested ROT-13 cypher."

Or something even more porous.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] Odo@lemmy.world 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh cool. The CEO is played by Mark Proksch. Didn't know who he was back when this first aired.

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

It's always fun when that happens

[–] shortwavesurfer@lemmy.zip 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Which means that it's not end-to-end encrypted. It's HTTPS encrypted, which is different.

If it was truly end-to-end encrypted, the only person who could access it would be you, and all they would get would be garbled mess.

[–] MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] toast@retrolemmy.com 2 points 1 month ago

I don't understand. The internet is just a series of tubes. Why don't they just transport the shit directly?

[–] rowinxavier@lemmy.world 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Just so I am clear, nobody has made the pun "end-to-end-to-end encryption" yet? Really?

[–] Natanael@infosec.pub 1 points 1 month ago

In Swedish, ända till ända