this post was submitted on 28 Mar 2025
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Cyberstuck

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A place to post your Cybertruck fails! We're here to make fun of this hunk of shit and throw as much shade as we can to that garbage bag of a human elon.

No doxxing No slurs No racism And no fucking nazis!

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[–] skozzii@lemmy.ca 183 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (4 children)

Buy a cybertruck, they are best vehicle ever, except a few catches.

Like for example you can't wash it or it'll break, cant drive it or the wheels will fall off, and best not to sit in it either incase it traps you inside.

This is quite possibly the greatest product America has ever made. Well atleast its affordable.

[–] Gullible@sh.itjust.works 61 points 1 week ago (4 children)

Wonder why no one is suing yet. I’m legitimately confounded by the absence of lawsuits

[–] philycheeze@sh.itjust.works 57 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a contracted arbitration or something…

[–] grue@lemmy.world 26 points 1 week ago

I am sick and tired of the war on property rights. The amount of companies trying to misrepresent product as services in order to seize undeserved control is too damn high!

[–] DarkSirrush@lemmy.ca 19 points 1 week ago

The ones that had by far the best grounds to sue burnt to death.

[–] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

Well, the guy who made the trucks gutted the CFPB a few months back...

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[–] Crikeste@lemm.ee 23 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Don’t touch the doors or the panel will fall off.

[–] ChaoticNeutralCzech@feddit.org 20 points 1 week ago

You can safely touch the emergency door release cover. That panel will NOT come off.

[–] ikidd@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

Apparently it's strong enough to keep it's passengers inside to be burned alive.

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[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Lol and don't slam the doors!

For the record, if you slam the doors the inside part comes partially loose and catches on the interior, so that when you open the door again the inside part tears away (literally tears like a rag).

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[–] PleaseLetMeOut@lemm.ee 11 points 1 week ago (3 children)

Well atleast its affordable.

Starting price is like $82,000, or $101k with options lol

https://www.caranddriver.com/tesla/cybertruck

[–] Kecessa@sh.itjust.works 33 points 1 week ago

Pretty sure that's the joke

[–] Noodle07@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Yeah but used ones must be very cheap lmao

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[–] heavydust@sh.itjust.works 77 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Same. I washed my hair yesterday and I had a heart attack. I also washed my stainless steel forks and they rust in a few minutes. It's the worst.

[–] Noodle07@lemmy.world 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

What ? Dont you know that dihydrogen monoxide has a Ph higher than any acid ? Why would you put that on your hair !

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[–] Helvetica@sh.itjust.works 74 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Ok, so a car wash kills it. What happens when it rains? Do they sell a giant umbrella to mount on the stupid ass thing?

[–] Pilferjinx@lemmy.world 51 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Maybe the soap dissolves some load bearing glue?

[–] madcaesar@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] finitebanjo@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago (12 children)

It's not a joke, the frame is plastic and the steel panels are glued on.

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[–] Etterra@discuss.online 24 points 1 week ago (3 children)

I wonder if it's because the "geniuses" at Tesla forgot to protect the electronics from water coming up from beneath it. It would explain a lot lol

[–] Cornelius_Wangenheim@lemmy.world 25 points 1 week ago (1 children)

There's a YouTube video of someone chopping one up and that's exactly what it is. There're holes in the frame that allow water to get inside the battery compartment and pool there.

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[–] Piemanding@sh.itjust.works 18 points 1 week ago

Somewhere else I saw that there are unprotected wires in a well of the frame that can accumulate water.

[–] schema@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

So that means someone could potentially brick a cybertruck by spraying water on it from below at the right spot?

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 20 points 1 week ago (2 children)

You're describing a puddle.

[–] SreudianFlip@sh.itjust.works 13 points 1 week ago (4 children)
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[–] Boomkop3@reddthat.com 69 points 1 week ago (6 children)

Apparently part of the frame fills up with water until the level gets high enough to short some critical internal wiring

[–] droans@midwest.social 37 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Smh y'all will do anything to disparage Teslers.

The driver does something stupid, such as getting the car wet, and the car sometimes shuts itself down instead of catching fire.

No other car even tries to stop itself after getting wet! Can't you see how much better they are?! Have you even said thank you once? In this conversation?

/s

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[–] pipes@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 week ago

Jesus Christ

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[–] HaveMeOnYourPodcast@lemmy.world 61 points 1 week ago (2 children)

You remember when he said it would function as a boat.

[–] stankmut@lemmy.world 62 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Like a boat, you don't get to use it as much as you like and you have to keep throwing money at it.

[–] ChapulinColorado@lemmy.world 10 points 1 week ago

And the 2 happiest days of ownership are when you get it and when you get rid of it. Although I’m guessing some people might be having second thoughts as they take delivery given all the news about the build quality. Truly revolutionary, making boats seem reliable.

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[–] ThefuzzyFurryComrade@pawb.social 57 points 1 week ago (14 children)

Note that the charger is stuck.

[–] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 20 points 1 week ago

Guess they don’t know about the string you yank hidden in the tailgate to unlock it manually

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[–] ArchmageAzor@lemmy.world 45 points 1 week ago (10 children)

So the Cyberfuck is:

  • Not bulletproof
  • Not waterproof
  • Can't handle mud or snow
  • Can't handle the sun
  • Can't handle parking lots

Did I miss anything?

[–] sunbytes@lemmy.world 1 points 5 days ago

Don't take it within 10 miles of the coast.

It activates dynamic "go brown and crumbly" safety feature on the outer panels.

[–] Jumi@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago

• fucking ugly

[–] ramenshaman@lemmy.world 15 points 1 week ago

Can rust even under ideal conditions

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[–] Etterra@discuss.online 44 points 1 week ago (2 children)

LOL "truck." Now it's a very pricey, completely stupid looking piece of lawn ornamentation.

[–] Bytemeister@lemmy.world 11 points 1 week ago

Like most trucks.

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[–] electric_nan@lemmy.ml 32 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Charge the car wash with terrorism.

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[–] LostWon@lemmy.ca 16 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Doesn't using a car wash without putting the car in "car wash mode" first void its warranty, or was that false news? (I don't remember where I heard it.) Nice way to make a lot of unsuspecting people void their warranty.

[–] over_clox@lemmy.world 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

That's actually in the owner's manual for the thing, very true. I've seen it posted before.

I wish I had a link handy for you, but honestly I despise the thing and would much rather piss on it than bother with any more research.

Hell, it's already a laundry list of recalls..

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[–] carrion0409@lemm.ee 10 points 1 week ago

Mfw my little hyundai hatchback is more durable than a supposed "prepper vehicle"

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