I just learned that in Collective Soul's Shine, he's not saying "you haven't let your light shine down". But it's actually a Jesus song and 'heaven let your light shine down." Over 30 years I was wrong lol

"'E' for very, very, extra ordinary." VS "'E' for very, very, extraordinary." The way I heard it performed always sounded like two separate words. I was like, "damn, she couldn't just be nice the whole song?" I finally read the lyrics when I was older.

"I don't want another heartache at my door, don't want another heartache on my list" VS "don't want another heartache on my lips."

In The Fray - How to Save a Life, they sing:
And I pray to God he hears you
I always heard:
and I paid a guy to kiss you

The song is largely about a person trying to help/give advice to a depressed friend. With this change in lyrics, I feel the desperation of the main character shines through far more brightly.
The friend has such low self esteem that you decide to pay someone to pretend to like them, because you're out of options for how to cheer them up.

Like a dog without a bone, like an actor OUT OF ROLE

For fuck's sake Jim, actor out on loan, pff! What had he been smoking?

“go to lonely starbucks lovers” my beloved

What the hell do you mean "like a kiss from a rose on the gray!?"

At a punk gig once I heard:

“Titties and cheesecake! Titties and cheesecake! Titties and cheesecake!“

They were actually singing about “Tinnies (Aussie for beer) on Tuesday”. Not as good IMO.

Hey now, you’re a rockstar, get the show on, get laid

Looking back on when we fisted
I cannot escape and I cannot forget
Baby, you're the one, you still turn me on
You can make me whole again

‘Carry a laser down the road that I must travel
Carry a laser through the darkness of the night’

🎶Wrapped up like a douche, another owner in the night🎶

🎶Hold me closer, Tony Danza🎶

not always. I saw this in a forum meant years ago, I wish I had saved a screenshot or something...

the forum thread was about the dumbest lyrics in songs and someone said sanitarium by metallica had these lyrics:

Got some death to do
Mirror stairs back hard
Kill, it's such a friendly word

and complained it's nonsense. why would stairs be made of mirrors, and what did that have anything with the rest... also what does stairs back hard even mean, etc ...

as you may have guessed even if you don't know the song, the lyrics are "mirror stares back hard", which means the person is talking about their own reflection having a look in their eyes.

not only were the misheard lyrics dumb, but I always admired the sheer confidence of the person who, upon hearing these nonsense lyrics, instead of using their internet access to look it up to confirm, used it to complain how stupid it was without thinking twice about whether they could have misunderstood.

'Cause I'm in too deep
And I'm trying to keep
~~up above in my head~~
All the thoughts in my head
'stead of going under

"It's too late to roll the dice" instead of "it's too late to apologize" sounds much more meaningful.

I always think of Metallica's Saint Anger:

🎶 Medallion noose, I hang myself

Saint Anger 'round my neck

I feel my world shake

Like an earthquake

Hard to see clear

Is it me? Is it fear?

I'm not even angry with you

I'm not even angry with you

I'm not even angry with you

I'm not even angry with you

🎶

Yet the real lyrics are:

I'm madly in anger with you

I'm madly in anger with you

I'm madly in anger with you

I'm madly in anger with you

... sigh...

Like this is Reebok or Nike song turns out to be this is the rhythm of my night

Matthew Good Band - Load Me Up

I always heard:

Picture yourself (At) the MGM Grand Murphy's fighting how come You're in the stands?

I loved this line as it was calling out the assumption when you picture something big, why are you in the crowd and not the star of the show? It felt motivating and a fun play on the way people imagine themselves in the world.

It's actually:

Picture yourself The MGM Grand Murphy's fighting Occam You're in the stands

Which, just doesn't do any of the things the misheard lyric does. So disappointing.

Here's to you Mrs. Robinson; She's a slutty moron you should know.

Superchunk has a song hyper enough. It sounds like they say "Laughter guns" but it's actually "Lofter winds"

Someone once told me that they thought the line in Uptown Funk was, "I'm too hot, hot ham!" and I've been hearing it that way ever since.

in my mind, the lyrics of no surprises by radiohead will always be

no one laughs and no surprises

rather than

no alarms and no surprises

It's a relatively minor difference, but for decades, I thought the lyric in Smashing Pumpkins' Muzzle went

🎵 My life has been extraordinary blessed and cursed at once 🎵

and it's been one of my favorite lines in any song. Except I was wrong. It goes

🎵 My life has been extraordinary blessed and cursed and won 🎵

It's not a favorite anymore.

Damn it, Mr.Ingle. Can you not sing "in the garden of eden" without sounding like you have a mouth full of pudding?

Fuck it. We'll just change the name of the damned song. Who the hell makes a 17 minute long song, anyhow? You're a damned idiot!

I cannot hear this song without thinking that the background singers are repeatedly saying "cut your balls off" during the refrain

Billy Idol - Mony Mony

There's a break-up song on Chvrch's debut album called Tether. One line, frequently repeated, goes "I'm feeling capable of... seeing the end." A fine lyric, very breakup, much hopeful.

Except, I can't tell when listening that she isn't saying "I feel incapable of..." I don't know if it's intentional but I think the ambiguity really elevates the song from semi-empowering breakup song to powerfully-relatable song about the chaos of seeing a relationship end; simultaneously believing you can get through it while also having no idea how you'll ever get through it.

It's just fun wordplay too: feeling capable/feel incapable. Makes me want to use that structure more in my own writing.

I've always heard promises promises give an end to those promises in the bridge of Lady Gaga's Pokerface