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[-] Kolanaki@yiffit.net 37 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I remember when these things first came out and I was super excited to try them and also the disappointment when I finally got to try them and they were just god awful.

But they're certainly not the worst lunchables. The nachos and chicken nuggets are even worse. The nachos you'd think would be fine. Just corn chips and cheese sauce. But the chips are stale and weird tasting and the cheese sauce is also not what you expect from nacho cheese. It's almost like they are trying to make kids hate junk food by making their junk food taste horrible.

The best ones are still the OGs that just have lunch meat, cheese and crackers. Not quite a fancy charcuterie board, but they also only cost about a dollar or two.

[-] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Eh, my kids love them all. But we're mean parents and hand-pack them healthy lunches for school, so they only get them occasionally as treats. My kids just started school, and today they got freshly cut fruit, rice, and some marinated beef (cooked this morning).

But they'll inevitably complain when they get home today that their friends got lunchables or the ghetto school lunch or whatever.

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[-] CosmicFjord@lemmy.world 30 points 1 month ago

Let’s also add more and more sodium just to break some records.

[-] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 17 points 1 month ago

You've got management written all over you with ideas like that.

[-] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 month ago

And salt is pretty much free and makes the package feel heavier.

Salt wasn't heavy enough so they also went with lead.

[-] YeetPics@mander.xyz 25 points 1 month ago

More like "what if this cost $0.05 to produce and I sold it for $3.50"?

[-] Lemminary@lemmy.world 25 points 1 month ago

Don't lynch me but... I have to confess that I liked them that way. The greasy & salty pepperoni, the stale crackers, the mushy cheese, all of it. I'm not a picky eater. You could serve me garbage and I'd say you're a great cook.

[-] RedditWanderer@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

And it beats the never ending stream of sandwiches. Pbj and co only get you through so many years.

Lunchables and dunkaroos anyday

[-] sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 month ago

One of my kids would love having a ham and cheese every day, and whenever I send something different, they complain. Some really like what they like.

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[-] Ragdoll_X@lemmy.world 24 points 1 month ago

Don't forget to add a bit of lead for seasoning

[-] Draegur@lemm.ee 15 points 1 month ago

Allegedly lead tastes sweet so...

[-] pacmondo@sh.itjust.works 15 points 1 month ago

Exactly. For seasoning

[-] craigers@lemmy.world 18 points 1 month ago

No joke last night I went for a late night snack. I pulled out some hard salami, aged Swiss, and some nice crackers. I realized this bastard charcuterie was just a luxury Lunchables.

[-] dejected_warp_core@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

I disagree. Your hasty charcuterie was just that. And I bet it was delicious.

Lunchables, on the other hand, are the cheap charcuterie knockoff devised by people who lost their tastebuds decades ago to excessive chainsmoking and the kind of world-weary ennui specific to only the most misanthropic millionaires. Their lack of any sense of smell is only eclipsed by their tenuous grasp on what's left of their zeal for life; a kind of self-hating spiral that not even the most debauchery-packed weekend in Vegas could ever hope to recover. No, these cretins are not people, they are the mere shadows, the faintest of pencil outlines of human beings. Lunchables are the best effort of these people attempting to emulate what they vaguely recall a meal actually is.

[-] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 15 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Pizza: When it’s good, it’s good. When it’s bad, it’s still pretty good. When it’s a Lunchable… admit it, you kept eating.

[-] AFaithfulNihilist@lemmy.world 14 points 1 month ago

The lunchables seems like a dystopian food stuff created by a team of psychopaths.

What if we made all of the food crappy, added extra preservatives and maybe a little bit of lead?

The Romans added led to their drinks it must have been delicious or something! ~Kraft food scientists probably

At this point I wouldn't be surprised if the meeting went like this:
"So, we sell these products by their weight, why don't we add something heavy in there just to boost profits?"

[-] telllos@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

Cold pizza can be amazing!

[-] driving_crooner@lemmy.eco.br 7 points 1 month ago

Pizza it's amazing, cold pizza is still a pizza, that makes it amazing, but is still an inferior kind of amazing that hot pizza.

[-] fsxylo@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

Morning cold pizza that you can just eat straight out of the fridge is ambrosia. It's like a third of your problems for the day have been solved.

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[-] Leate_Wonceslace@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 month ago
[-] wolfshadowheart@slrpnk.net 7 points 1 month ago

The crazy part to me is that it's specifically the Lunchables made for schools.

Really makes me feel like Sisco or Bon Appetit (industrial prison complex companies) are the ones producing the food, just like they do for prisons.

[-] weirdbeardgame@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago

As a kid though. Lunchables was the shit

[-] Futtyklam@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

Anyone put the m&ms on it?

[-] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

You absolute monster

[-] NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 4 points 1 month ago

Didn't they make one where that was the point? You even had a little sachet of chocolate sauce to spread across the dough.

[-] osaerisxero@kbin.melroy.org 6 points 1 month ago

Yes, some of the packs contain a 'desert' pizza that's m&ms and chocolate sauce

[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 9 points 1 month ago
[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Breakfast of champions

[-] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

I feel so attacked. I just got done eating one, and it wasn't even name brand. To be fair I'm having to live out of a motel with only a microwave and limited money

[-] kamenlady@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

Also living that nice limited money life? Sometimes i feel like McGyver coming up with alternative ways of doing some things.

[-] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago

We're doing our best lol. If anyone has any tips for cheap microwaveable food I'm all ears

[-] roguetrick@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

If you've got potatoes you just need a masher, some salt, some oil/butter, some water/milk, and a bowl. Gotta eyeball the consistency to figure out how much you need of the liquid, the rest is for taste. Cheap as hell but it'll get you fat. Peeling is optional.

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[-] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 3 points 1 month ago

Been there a few times. Car, too. If you can afford it, they sell hot plates/plug in coolers at Walmart. But my suggestion is a deep fryer. Not the square one, the round one. If you take the basket out, it's essentially just a large pot. You can do anything in it you'd do in a skillet, but can also boil water or make soup. They're invaluable in those situations. Depending on the size of the hotel mini fridge, you can normally get a thing of chicken leg quarters in it. That and some veggies and you can make a million different meals. Hit me up if you want any advice, I've seriously been down that road, and it's not easy, but there are some tips and tricks that make a lot more bearable.

[-] Cadeillac@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Thank you, this is good stuff. The fridge is pretty fucking small, and they seem to have a strict absolutely no cooking in the room rule. They have outdoor grills, but then I have to get charcoal and learn how with out ruining the food. Can't spare any. I'm so sick of moving or I'd try to find a slightly better motel

[-] dharmacurious@slrpnk.net 2 points 1 month ago

Most places have that same rule. I just ignore it and do my best to never cook anything too fragrant. Cookint in the bathroom with the fan on helps, too. I've also cooked in my car, but that requires a pretty beefy inverter and uses gasoline. Might be able to get away with running a drop cord but that's a case by case.

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[-] protist@mander.xyz 7 points 1 month ago

Whatever, fuck you, you'll eat it

[-] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

My brother is 33 and still loves that crap

[-] Num10ck@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

its the charcuterie board for the unwashed masses

[-] roofTophopper@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Back in the day, lunchables were the cool kid food. That and kid cuisine. Now, lunchables seem like what dumpster juices would taste like.

[-] almost1337@lemm.ee 4 points 1 month ago
[-] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

The idea is sound, make something easy to pick up for your kid for lunch. The execution isn't so great. For how much they charge, an entrepreneur should get on this making actual good lunches that are healthy but kids will still want to eat.

[-] TheSlad@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 month ago

I get the cheaper Armour brand ones, my kids like them better and they're half the price.

Still not healthy though.

[-] pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

Even partially healthy would be an improvement.

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this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2024
774 points (97.9% liked)

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