It's international women's day or, as we call it in my neck of the woods, feminist struggle day. So in light of a recent discussion that was apparently very unpleasant for everybody involved, i will take the effort and vindicate something that a lot of you apparently have yet to understand correctly: TMA / TME discourse. In the following, i will adress the most common questions about, misconceptions of and attacks on these ideas.
What does TMA / TME mean?
It's a set of two terms that allow an intersectional analysis of the particularly precarious place trans women and transfeminine nonbinary people have in patriarchal gender relations.
TMA stands for transmisogny affected. It describes anybody who is marginalized on the grounds of being both trans and a woman or a femme-aligned nonbinary person. This is a particularly potent intersection of different forms of oppression because a lot of transphobic discourse has focussed on demonizing, ridiculing, stereotyping and otherwise targeting trans women. Furthermore, transphobia has strong roots in misogyny and trans women are particularly threatening to the patriarchal order, as the very existence of people who abandon their male privilege to live as women full time threatens the assumptions of make supremacy underlying that system. Therefore it is hardly surprising that transmisogyny is generally the most violent and virulent form of transphobia. If you do not believe me, go ahead and check the data for the trans murder monitoring and see how many transfems are killed compared to other trans identities. Check how many Hollywood movies have drummed it into people's heads that vomitting is the correct reaction to our presence. Take a look at who gets targeted by sports bans. Take a look who gets cited as a security concern for cis women when trans people are barred from public life.
By contrast, TME stands for transmisogyny exempt and refers to literally anybody who doesn't have to put up with being stripped off their rights like this.
Isn't this just recreating the gender binary?
No. This is a common accusation, but very obviously untrue. TME isn't synonymous with "trans men and transmasculine nonbinary people" and it is not supposed to be used that way unless we are focussing exclusively on dynamics within trans communities that roughly 99% of TME people just can't be part of.
You see, the label in itself mostly includes people who are not affected by any form of transphobia, namely cis women and cis men. It's hardly a recreation of the gender binary when it includes all binary genders besides trans women.
So you're saying trans men aren't opressed?
No, far from it. Trans men and other TME trans people still suffer from transphobia, and that is a pretty serious form of discrimination. Any of them who has an at least theoretically working uterus also faces additional strain about their reproductive rights and bodily autonomy, especially if their plan is to just get rid of that thing. On top of all that, transmasc nonbinary people are also affected by exorsexism (the mistaken belief that there are only two genders) and when TME people share another axis of intersectional opression like racialization, disability, class etc. that can obviously affect them severely as well (and if you do look at trans men that become victims of hate crimes, intersection especially with racialization is extremely common, as we also see among murdered trans women who are BIPOC in about 70% of all cases). Not being affected by transmisogyny doesn't change any of that. Intersectionality matters. That's the entire point of this discourse, that you cannot look at one axis of opression in a vacuum.
Being exempt from transmisogyny does, however, mean that TME people are spared from a very powerful intersection of different oppressive mechanisms, as none of their vulnerabilities are potentiated by transmisogyny. And it means that within trans communities, trans men generally have a privileged status over trans women. Patriarchal methods of silencing and controlling women have been internalized by anybody living in our culture and they can and do show up in trans spaces, both on- and offline. Even outside of these communities, trans men enjoy - albeit conditional - male privilege in any situation where they pass, just as i, for example, enjoy conditional privileges of white womanhood as long as i am perceived as a cis woman. Yes, that privilege is always precarious, as our genders are always under attack in this world, but it is nevertheless there.
In fact, a lot of the problems that are described by the TMA / TME discourse directly mirror the struggles of black women, who are also routinely opressed by men both without and within their own communities, men that are themselves extremely and brutally marginalized outside of black communities. Terms like misogynoir have been coined for a reason, and it is telling that anti-TMA discourse so frequently denies that misogynoir is even a thing.
*But my transmasc friend gets called the t slur every time he wears a dress!
Yes, gendernonconforming men are discriminated against in our society. They may even be mistaken for trans women at times. The difference between a GNC trans man and me is that the GNC trans man can post about getting told that he will never be a woman on r/accidentalallies or any of the other spaces for the entire genre of "lol that dumb biggot was transmisogynist to me even though i am not even a woman" whereas i get another microtrauma from that kind of interaction.
Isn't this just opression olympics?
I am not trying to opressionmaxx, i am pointing out mechanisms that affect me even in supposed safer spaces. Of which i do not have many. When there are mechanics at play that allow trans men to whip up a targeted harassment campaign when they deem that me standing up for my friends is "hysterical" or "unhinged" or is making them uncomfortable in other ways, regardless of the fact that the exact same behavior from me was viewed as "determined" and "fiercely loyal" and even "diplomatic and fair", i have a problem. I have lost access to orgs and spaces because of this shit. I have trauma from these encounters. And i am not alone in this.
You are splitting queer communities!"
No, i am trying to make the tiny number of spaces i can inhabit in the first place not hostile for me. That's hard to do when you constantly have to watch out that you do not hurt a man's fragile ego by speaking up.

good post. was there a struggle session about this?
yeah, whipping girl, julia serrano, and tma/tme came up sometimes in the past and it felt like it was against the idea of tma/tme due to serrano writing some exorsexist statements into whipping girl
There was a lot of shouting down of anyone who disagreed in threads on that subject, so I'm glad to see things moving in a more reasonable direction.
I stopped using the site for a while and have still never engaged with the trans community here because of how I've been treated by other trans people on this website simply for raising my own experiences in discussions on subjects like that stuff - had it implied I was bigoted against trans men, that I wasn't really trans, that I was exorsexist myself, that I was outright fabricating my experiences, etc etc.
So, yeah, glad to see that reasonable discussion is now actually possible.
Edit:
In fact, it was the very same thread in which I was treated like that that led to this much better thread's creation. Nice.
yeah that thread skeeved me out when it was posted. was a good thread to self crit for me but i did notice the nothorses post that got cited as a reason to not use such a distinction as tma/tme. i did try to ignore it but it did sour me on interacting as a trans woman on this site
Yeah the vibes were fucking rancid. To be quite honest given the subject of discussion it pretty much proved to me that - like most spaces that are rabidly gender accelerationist or abolitionist - there is, like Serano was saying, quite often a bias against binary trans women here.
I was really feeling the women of women thing having everyone in that thread imply my experiences weren't real or didn't matter while they were doing the exact same behavior that Serano was pointing out and that I had experienced of casting being non-binary as being Superior and More Virtuous and Woke than being a binary trans woman - for it's always trans women that get that shit, never trans men, because it's just a manifestation of transmisogyny.
Yeah, this is my main criticism with that passage from Whipping Girl: I have also experienced that kind of sentiment over and over again, and it always came from TME trans people, i have never seen that behavior from nonbinary transfems and i have not once seen it directed at binary trans men. In the cases were that kind of discourse pops up in trans spaces, it's always transmasc enbies attacking trans women. So i wouldn't call it "binary-phobia", i do disagree with that wording. It's just transmisogyny. But yes, it does happen. That does not mean exorsexism and truscum shit isn't a problem, but i haven't seen any of that anywhere in Whipping Girl, in spite of the text being 20 years old.
Moreover, this line of thinking is a lot more common among cis people. That's not to say that cis people aren't crushingly exorsexist, because they are, but they will shamelessly use the existence of "third genders" in other cultures to tell trans women we are problematic and conservative for medically transitioning or for claiming womanhood instead of allowing ourselves to be relegated to a third gender so that cissies can keep treating us as not-women. Whipping Girl in fact has an entire chapter about that, and keeps bringing up examples of cis people appropriating and weaponizing cherrypicked nonbinary experiences against trans women as "evidence" why nobody should medically transition. It's a standard tactic of terfs to tell trans women we are "reinforcing restrictive views of femininity" by claiming binary womanhood. And yes, ofc they will immediately do a 180 as soon as they are confronted with actual nonbinary people, but that's terfs for ya, they have no actual convictions.
Yeah I'm +2ing all of this, although I'll note I have faced the behavior described from other TMA Non-binary people. Mostly, as indicated, rabidly gender abolitionist or accelerationist ones - that is in fact the primary reason I've never been able to hold to that position.
~~And frankly their theory is a half baked pamphlet that doesn't make sense but that probably counts as sectarianism.~~
I'm not even binary anymore (though I reject the label of non-binary for this among other reasons) but I'm never going to be able to fuck with views that literally led to me being pressured into detransition. Never.
Hopefully this place will be less Like That over time though I'll admit to my hopes being low given how much the mod team used to push gender accelerationism.
Is Whipping Girl bad? I'd heard about it and have it as a TBR but haven't started it yet.
I personally would not say so. The exorsexism in the book is all pretty typical of the time in which it was written, and it is regardless an extremely important book for articulating the theory of transmisogyny.
People in the older thread being referred to also heavily overplayed how exorsexist it actually was, in my opinion, because they refused to acknowledge some of the things Serano was talking about were factual extant problems within the 'queer community'.