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Yeah, it's really fucking annoying and yet typical. I've never really known gay men to act in any other way, honestly.

Might just be because of my age/time spent in the queer community - I would suspect that in many ways younger gay men who have grown up with much much more social acceptance may actually be WORSE about this then ones who are even 10~ years older.

That said from what I've read gay men have never treated trans women particularly well, as a trend. Unexamined misogyny and in particular transmisogyny seems to have been an issue even in the worst stages of homophobic oppression. Lesbians have always been much better about that stuff, despite the cultural prominence of TERF lesbians.

The amount of times I've had a gay man pull out that condescending 'we' when discussing specifically transfem issues is FAR too many, yeah.

Thank you very much!!!!!!!!

Thank you for the support, for the record. Figures he was a gay guy - I've seen this sort of behavior from supposed ally gay men way too many times.

I think being gay and subject to homophobia makes a lot of them forget that they are still capable of being misogynistic and acting in a patriarchal manner, and especially still capable of being transmisogynistic, to put it politely.

I didn't accuse you of being transphobic, jackass, I accused you of talking down to me and insulting me by implying I'm a fucking /tttt/ poster when I'd been nothing but good faith. I was never even suggesting this was a fucking 'trans madness caused murder', those are words you put in my mouth.

Disengage doesn't work like that, you can't leave a fucking parting shot accusing me of being a fucking Nazi. But whatever, I'm done with this, sorry you can't handle a trans woman disagreeing with you.

Transmisogynist pig.

I've never stepped on /tttt/ in my life, dipshit. My opinion on cis men in relationships with trans women is entirely based on my own experience and those of every single trans woman I have ever fucking met.

Don't talk down to me like I don't know the experiences of myself and my sisters, he/fucking/him. What I'm saying wouldn't seem so incomprehensible to you if actually had any understanding of what life is like for trans women under this dogshit patriarchy.

Do remember I repeatedly said 'assuming the narrative being presented is true'. I don't really have the skepticism about the reality of these texts everyone else seems to - personally the way he texts in this document seems perfectly normal, I know a bunch of people who text like that including myself - but I'm not entirely uncritically accepting the government narrative here.

Probably 95% of cis men who get into relationships with trans women are chasers, bluntly, it's far more likely than not when it comes to men seeking trans women. I haven't seen that evidence suggesting the relationship started before transition, though, that would definitely suggest I am more likely to be incorrect.

I am specifically calling out the intense objectification required to do something like this, which does occasionally end up directed towards cis women, yes, not that it is equivalent to a chaser relationship as the power dynamic there is quite different.

The fascists are unfortunately going to accelerate the crackdown regardless because of this adventurist moron. Me calling it how I see it privately to my friends and on an obscure, irrelevant internet communist forum isn't going to move the needle on that anyway.

Assuming the narrative being presented is true, I'm personally fairly comfortable calling this guy a chaser as a trans woman myself.

Doing this shit for these reasons is a clear and obvious demonstration of a lack of any consideration for his girlfriend's actual happiness and desires, under this narrative he clearly seems far more concerned about the concept/object of her than the actual material reality of her - otherwise he wouldn't've gotten her involved in all this highly dangerous bullshit.

Again, assuming these texts and all are real, this feels gross and objectifying to me in the same way people trying to kill people to impress/gain the approval of celebrities is gross and objectifying, just with a different context.

That is still lying and still carries all of the same psychological difficulties in terms of actually pulling it off.

Have you ever had to lie by omission to any sort of authority figure? Particularly likely already being traumatized by interactions with authority figures, like a LOT of trans people are?

If you don't have difficulties with that, you genuinely have nerves of steel and that's extremely impressive, but even if you're convinced 'temporarily becoming very forgetful' is something most trans people are capable of successfully doing, this is a situation that is 1000x worse than anything anyone would reasonably expect to deal with it.

It's not just cops, it's cops investigating a fucking political assassination and looking for anything they can to blame this on you specifically and people like you, it is the number 1 news item in the entire country! The stakes and psychological stress are so much fucking higher - I definitely couldn't keep my shit together while being 'very forgetful' with all this stress on me, honestly. Especially not with cops poking and proding for any cracks in that front.

As an autist myself, don't fucking use autistic as an insult, jackass.

I honestly don't even believe Elon Musk is autistic, I think he's faking it to get the 'savant' image, but that doesn't change the fact that using autistic as an insult is obviously ableist.

Yes, but his presence incidentally helped some political prisoners do a revolution and then he blew up the planet anyway.

I suppose. Honestly, it was already kind of risky anyway, which I guess is why it feels stupid and petty to me. I knew already it'd be an enclosed space where almost nobody is wearing a mask - but god this puts it over the line for me no matter how desperate I am for IRL community with the sort of people I've been drawn to my entire life.