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submitted 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) by Lussy@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

Oh no, my miserable life that’s devoid of any connection and anyone altogether otherwise *at least contains a friend.

What the fuck man, is this a real concern average people have that I’m way too fucking alienated to understand

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[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 25 points 11 months ago

couplehood is the modern religion and by that awesomely glib take i mean: there is tremendous socialization to find purpose and meaning (and absolution) in "the special someone", which has only seemed to heighten in the parts of society that want to stay on program while our institutions fail and the climate crisis looms. all that to say, i understand the desperation especially among the young. so much mass culture (TV, movies, music) tells them that the only thing they will ever do that matters is find someone who completes them (because of course they're incomplete as they are!).... it's a very efficient way to get everyone (single and not) out there consuming.

but of course, i agree completely with you, especially as i've gotten older. i value my friends and treasure making new ones in whatever context or however long it works out. i would rather have a new limited scope work friend to joke around with than a new ex- from a fraught relationship where at least one of us was not paying attention to the warnings of a bad match.

[-] ikilledtheradiostar@hexbear.net 22 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

To maybe add a little. Alienation under capitalism is such that it forces all care to fall to the insular family unit and destroys other modes of material support. For instance, most help with housing, food, and care come from blood relationships. Especially from those lines that will support accumulation. Capitalism like the shit prion disease it is folds all into its like.

That being said, finding a friend is somewhat a luxury but finding family is to find a survival tool in this hellscape.

Also people really love to fuck. So finding out the person you're trying to fuck doesn't want to fuck you is kind of a bummer. Not to try and justify the toxic levels it goes to but it can be disappointing.

[-] 1nt3rd1m3nt10n4l@hexbear.net 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

(because of course they're incomplete as they are!)

Aren't we though, isn't that the whole point of having social solidarity with other people? If you don't need anyone else, why would you ever care about the state of society?

Why wouldn't you just be a Randian, then?

[-] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 11 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

it is implying that the only way to have social solidarity is through a romantic relationship, when in reality, the way many people in the US practice romance is to let other social connections wither and make one other person their entire aocial support network.

contrary to the messaging of mass culture, the opposite of couplehood is not loneliness or solitude.

this post was submitted on 31 Aug 2023
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