this post was submitted on 07 Apr 2024
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Lemmy Shitpost

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all 49 comments
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[–] Shieldtoad@sh.itjust.works 30 points 2 years ago
[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 23 points 2 years ago (6 children)

Can't. My phone keeps reorienting.

[–] RandomVideos@programming.dev 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

At last! I knew that inversion table I bought four years ago and used three times was going to be good for something.

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

Can't even trust your phone these days smh my head

[–] Katana314@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago

Tell it that, while you “support” its decisions, funding its college education will be contingent on finding a spouse to have a baby with.

Follow me for more toxic phone-parenting tips.

[–] PhoreTwunny@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You just gotta lay it flat on a table, then spin it.

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago

Beyblade style!

[–] badbrainstorm@lemmy.today 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

If android just turn off auto-rotate in drop down menu

[–] KoalaUnknown@lemmy.world 0 points 2 years ago

Same for iPhone. It’s just called portrait lock instead.

[–] EffortlessEffluvium@lemm.ee 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Not mine, it’s Occidental.

[–] Cryophilia@lemmy.world -1 points 2 years ago
[–] Diurnambule@jlai.lu 16 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Seems like the shame could be on you

[–] Diurnambule@jlai.lu 1 points 2 years ago

Doesn't it say, got me one time shame on you, got me two time shame one me ?

[–] hydroptic@sopuli.xyz 2 points 2 years ago

Yeah the shame's definitely on you

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

This post reminds me of one of my favourite Anthony Jeselnik jokes:

My dad did not fuck around. My dad did not trust anybody. My dad did not trust anyone. In fact, he had a saying… but he wouldn’t tell me.

[–] johsny@lemmy.world 14 points 2 years ago
[–] Thcdenton@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 3 points 2 years ago

This was my first boisterous laugh of the day. Thanks!

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago (1 children)

How to gain someone's trust:
Say "never trust anyone".

[–] twinnie@feddit.uk 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] june@lemmy.world 37 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Turning it over does nothing particularly special other than looking at the image upside down. There’s no second image. If you turned the image upside down you got got for trusting OP.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 11 points 2 years ago

I don't trust you

[–] DaCrazyJamez@sh.itjust.works 8 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Oooohhhh shiiit. Took a solid minute to see it but daaamn

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] tpihkal@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

How long since you last lost? 😁

[–] fushuan@lemm.ee 3 points 2 years ago
[–] yemmly@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

We both just lost it.

[–] GladiusB@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

I can't believe they did them like that

[–] PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee 5 points 2 years ago

Is this loss?

[–] shasta@lemm.ee 3 points 2 years ago

There's no trust involved here.

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

This didn't trick me.

Apropos of nothing in particular, I'm going to go make a coffee.

[–] Aurenkin@sh.itjust.works 2 points 2 years ago (2 children)
[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I made this with AI to support my deception

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I don't believe you, this is clearly a real coffee

[–] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You can't put your finger in coffee for real, it would burn. This is AI.

[–] 9point6@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'll concede the finger might be artificial, but that's a real coffee.

[–] Skalix@feddit.de 2 points 2 years ago

Ceci n'est pas un café

[–] dave@feddit.uk 0 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Seems harsh—lots of people make coffee these days.

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

I myself have made coffee today, FYI.

[–] Alsjemenou@lemy.nl 1 points 2 years ago

Almost had me there