Asklemmy

Try talking about it with other people. Most folks will admit that they have the same problems. Remember, it's just as egotistical to say that you're the worst person ever as it is to say you've never made a single mistake.

I know I'm stupid so I am must be smarter than you
  -Rehab, Rattle My Cage

I think I'm dumb. I'm just amazed at how fucking stupid so many others are.

Dude,

Missing the sence in talk( Sometimes get the sense when re-thought later )

You are waay smarter than you thought.

Lol Your brain is collecting more information than it should.

People blubber, and most don't even remember what they were yapping about!

Edit: mentally elevated people often diagnose themselves. It's safe to say "trust your instincts, they are probably right" except for the dumb part :)

yes, for sure. I think we all do.

I think it requires a reframing of the mind. The 'smart-dumb' scale is an oversimplification of human intellect. It was never entirely accurate. Ignoring intellectual disabilities, every human is equally as capable as being as smart as any other human. We're the same kind of animal.

The true factor in intellect is your curiosity. Some people are naturally curious of different subjects and will learn more about those subjects. Some people are incurious about most subjects and won't learn much at all. Most of the traditionally 'smart' people you think of were just sufficiently curious in whatever field they're qualified in. None of the traditionally 'smart' people you think of were born smart.

Foster your curiosity. If you know what excites you, you're already half way to intelligence.

Good question imo!

I feel dumb on a regular basis but for various reasons. Sometimes I dont get what people mean, sometimes I just take on things that I dont yet grasp. Both are very different situations imo.

Things I did to change this included: watching/reading about reasons for this, talking to others about it, talking to a professional about it, writing down my experiences and trying to make sense of them.

All of these things helped me, over time. Nothing was instant. Today I still have moments like this but I feel better because I understand why they happen and what I can do to live a healthier life.

This may get long, but it's good info. Please bear with the length.

Honestly OP, I feel like based on how you've worded things that this may be a result of anxiety (symptom or disorder, couldn't tell you). Important note: if this is an ongoing thing, you may have trained yourself to ignore it.

First, some background: Feeling stupid can happen because when you feel anxiety, your frontal lobe (where you think) turns off. Anxiety is a form of fight or flight, and when that kicks in, your amygdalas (base of brain) block off the thinking part of your brain.

To your points:

-Missing things in conversation and catching them later often happens when you're back to a safe place and you come out of fight or flight and your frontal lobe turns back on.

-Not making new friends, because social is new or "work" to meet new people. If you're feeling anxious you're not going to have the energy to want to do that. (You kinda mentioned this by not wanting to get out of your comfort zone).

-Passively, the steps are hard to give in a general sense. Usually I'd suggest you're pushing too hard in your life or (maybe accidentally) ignoring triggers. Actively, there are grounding exercises for anxiety, but they are only a bandaid of your life is constantly pushing you to high stress.

-You made a comment about making notes but not wanting to feel silly. Feeling like you're being watched or judged can also be a symptom of you're anxious.

I am not a therapist but I have an extensive amount of psychology research and years of therapy that I have gone through for several things including anxiety. Feel free to message me if you want to dig in more! If you don't, I would recommend a counselor to help dig into your situation either way. I can't express how helpful it can be.

Feel dumb? I am dumb.

No, I damn know I am dumb.

Sometimes get the sense when re-thought later

Not quite the same but there is even a term in German for that feeling of thinking of exactly the right thing to say but only once it is too late, it is called a Treppenwitz (literally stair joke), basically when you think of the joke that would have been perfectly funny in context but only once it is too late.

When I was young, I used to think I was pretty smart. Now the older I get, the dumber I feel.

Speaking generally, I think most people are pretty dumb. Just because somebody thinks they're smart doesn't mean they are. We're also pretty susceptible to propaganda, and carry with us countless biases that we aren't even aware we have. Generally, humans act emotionally first - often in defiance of logic.

That said, I don't think people are stupid or anything. Like, we all have talents or passions or fields of study that make us special. It's difficult to measure intelligence fairly - a mechanic might not do very well on an IQ test, but they've still got very specialized training and experience that I don't share.

Nobody should be belittling anybody for being dumb, it comes naturally to us dumb apes

Nobody will care if you are "dumber" than them. Listening more than you talk is an admirable quality. I don't judge my friends on their intellect, it's sometimes fun to have quick thinkers around but slow thinkers can be deep thinkers and sometimes see things in ways I miss.

So, in general no I don't feel dumb around most people but neither do I feel like I am smart like some people.

You want to gain confidence, it sounds like, yes? Maybe build up some skill at small talk, use that. Most people aren't walking around having deep conversations with everyone they meet. You can practice small talk at the grocery, at the park, anywhere you are waiting in line. Just have the really short conversations, get used to interacting.

The best thing you can do if you feel like you're missing context because of a lack of knowledge, is to educate yourself. Start learning more about popular topics. Read encyclopedias. Consider some general education classes at a community college or adult school.

If you think that you're missing context because your processing speed is too slow, then you can work on your mental reaction time. There are a lot of fun trivia games that you can play to get used to thinking and retrieving information faster. But the more familiar you are with a subject, the better you'll be at this. So, continuing your education will help here too.

If you think that your response time is impaired by anxiety, then you can work on overcoming social anxiety. This is probably best done with a professional, and outside my ability to advise upon. I do know that salespeople often talk through common objectives with themselves while looking in the mirror. So you can definitely find resources for getting comfortable with being uncomfortable in the salesmanship section of your local bookstore, or any number of sales seminars available in audio or video format.

Good luck to you! Identifying a problem is the first step to solving it, and you've already done that! Asking for help is often the hardest step and you've done that too! You've got this!

I broke one of the one-of-a-kind dishes my wife's pottery-making uncle made for her. It didn't slip- I was just really tired that evening and forgot how many hands I have. Yes, I sometimes feel dumb.