this post was submitted on 22 Oct 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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top 35 comments
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[–] CaliforniaSober@lemmy.ca 1 points 4 minutes ago* (last edited 1 minute ago)

You: “Wait… Why can’t I log into this meeting? “

Them: “Dont worry about it…”

———

Just a reminder kids, HR is there to fuck you. They are not there to help you.

Never look to HR for help unless your problem can be used to blackmail the company into basic compliance.

[–] Kintarian@lemmy.world 2 points 25 minutes ago

And there's a plastic sheet covering the fancy rug

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 12 points 6 hours ago (2 children)

This happened to me this morning. I got promoted to department head.

[–] MsPenguinette@lemmy.world 3 points 1 hour ago

My condolences

[–] Ravenheart@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

Are you happy about that or not? Need to know before I congratulate you. Haha.

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 1 points 28 minutes ago* (last edited 27 minutes ago)

I'm nervous and pleased to be recognized for my efforts.

Thanks for asking

[–] MutantTailThing@lemmy.world 57 points 9 hours ago (3 children)

I was called into a meeting like this once to talk about why I got so fucking angry all the time.

Apparently ‘Stop giving me reasons to get angry’ was not an acceptable explanation.

[–] Captain_Buddha@lemmy.world 12 points 4 hours ago (2 children)

Have you tried altering how you say things?

[–] gandalf_der_13te@feddit.org 1 points 1 hour ago

lmao "due to some easily offended employees"

[–] Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 3 hours ago

I'm not certain that's feasible

[–] SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 36 points 9 hours ago (2 children)

I just don't understand why everybody else doesn't try not being a stupid asshole.

[–] ceenote@lemmy.world 17 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Have you tried telling them they're stupid assholes? Maybe they haven't realized.

Speaking from multiple points of experience on this one, it’s a coin toss. Sometimes it works.

[–] DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world 12 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Sometimes the idea of living alone in the woods in a small shack doesn’t really sound so bad.

[–] Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 9 hours ago
[–] scytale@piefed.zip 6 points 6 hours ago

Lost a couple of teammates this month to layoffs. Fucking bs.

[–] BallShapedMan@lemmy.world 23 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

That's when you get let go. But when HR joined and I said "fuck" it was too late to write me up for it. So I had that going for me!

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 9 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

What school or church did you work for where you weren’t allowed to curse in private?

[–] BallShapedMan@lemmy.world 5 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

I wasn't in private, HR was there. My boss joined shortly after.

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 3 points 3 hours ago (1 children)

So you weren’t in front of children or customers, just your superiors. Using a four-letter word in front of them was enough to offend their sensibilities that they would have written you up for it had they not already intended to fire you.

Real inspirational leadership right there.

[–] BallShapedMan@lemmy.world 2 points 2 hours ago

Probably not, I was just trying to make a joke. I failed.

[–] TrackenDaKracken@lemmy.world 16 points 9 hours ago* (last edited 9 hours ago) (2 children)

I got sent home for the day because I responded to the wrong email. I clicked on the wrong email and wrote a response that didn't make any sense.

From home, I sent one last email to work saying I wouldn't be returning to work. That was the last thing I said them. That really pissed them off, they tried so hard to get me to come back in for an "exit interview", which is just what they use to cover their ass. They even withheld a bonus check. By law, they can't withhold your last paycheck owed, though.

[–] Taleya@aussie.zone 1 points 1 hour ago

Exit interviews are fun i rip management a thousand new arseholes

[–] diablomnky@lemmy.world 5 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

I would have loved for a former employer to try and pull that stunt in my state. All I'd have to do is take that recording/email to any judge and automatically get 3x in damages plus the original amount. You don't fuck with earned wages in Colorado.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 1 points 6 hours ago

Same in Florida, and I'd guess most states. Employees don't know their rights and come into spaces like this bitching. A call to the state labor board and that employer has to produce answers and the employee is automatically right unless they can prove otherwise.

[–] TrackenDaKracken@lemmy.world 12 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Call people a "resource" is so on the nose. We're just another input on their spreadsheet. Something to use and exploit to generate profit for them.

I'm surprised more people don't point this out.

[–] GeneralEmergency@lemmy.world 13 points 9 hours ago

Im14andthisisdeep

[–] panda_abyss@lemmy.ca 9 points 9 hours ago

They must be fast tracking giving me a raise!

HR is there to sign off so there’s no waiting, nice!

[–] FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 5 points 7 hours ago

They wanna hear the really good joke i made earlier!

[–] Triumph@fedia.io 2 points 7 hours ago

I'm in this picture and I don't like it.

[–] DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world -3 points 9 hours ago (1 children)

Tell me this is slavery without telling me this is slavery.

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 8 points 6 hours ago (1 children)

Tell me you're not familiar with slavery, etc...

[–] DonutsRMeh@lemmy.world 0 points 1 hour ago (1 children)

Stfu. We are all slaves to our jobs and bills.

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 1 points 27 minutes ago