Jazz Wazard
this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2026
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Juzz Worzord
Theyβre really running out of unclaimed horse names.
you leave my kiwi accent alone!!
He knows his way around Autumn's Queefs for sure.
If it was a Cadillac Iβd say your right but itβs a Corolla
Jizz Wizard. You've never seen all the things he can do with Jizz.
They either play an instrument or believe they possess magical abilities with ejaculate
You're a jizzard, Harry
Or both. They're the single overlap between jazz and jizz, outstanding at both. Like the human talent equivalent of 40 degree weather.
Sax/sex
Maybe they're a gay virgin in their 30's?
Fun fact: The music that they're playing in the cantina in Star Wars: A New Hope is called "jizz" and the musicians are called "jizz-wailers". This is canon.
This is canon.
Not anymore. Per https://www.cbr.com/star-wars-cantina-music-genre/
The music that is played by cantina band(s) like Figrin Dβan and the Modal Nodes is known as jizz, first noted in 1983's novelization of Return of the Jedi. However, the official title didnβt come into fruition until 1995 in the "Tales from the Mos Eisley Cantina." The back cover officiated the music genre: βIn a far-off corner of the universe, on the small desert planet of Tatooine, there is a dark, nic-i-tain-filled cantina where you can down your favorite intoxicant while listening to the best jizz riffs in the universe.β Specifically, itβs a mixture of jazz, upbeat, and swinging style that is similar to the music people still listen to today. Music players of jizz are also called jizz-wailers. This musical genre could be heard by the characters from within the story, producing a realistic feel of what is considered entertainment in the Star Wars universe.
Unfortunately, the title is no longer considered canon and is only a part of Star Wars Legends, where anything published before 2014 from within the Star Wars universe is considered not canon. For canon purposes, the first actual appearance of a cantina band was in Jabbaβs Palace in Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi with the band Sy Snootles and the Wailers, also known as the Max Rebo Band. The first song that played over was "Lapti Nek," which played over the death of Oola. However by 1997, a special edition replaced the song with a more upbeat swing on the music. The new song was called "Jedi Rocks," and Sy Snootles' puppet costume was now a CGI rendition of the character. Whatβs considered canonized and whatβs not remains a bit cluttered. But for now, the Max Rebo Band is the only canon jizz music group within Star Wars continuity.
Fuck Disney. Look how they massacred my ~~boy~~ canon.
What they did to force witches alone is heartbreaking. There was a moment, in Acolyte where I thought might fix it but they didn't really, and the show got cancelled.
I'm not a toxic fanboy but damn if they don't love taking old canon, ripping it apart and then gluing it back together so it's almost the same but not at all really. like busting up a sports car to build a wagon and it sucks to see.
It's like they looked at the EU that already existed, and threw darts at what to keep and what to toss to the point of incoherence. Which is rough, because the EU (Legends as a whole) was so ripe with amazing material.
Disney definitely shit the bed, and I'm not even that big of a Star wars guy beyond loving stormtroopers lol
I don't like it either. Star Wars books were life in school
Well this is great actually, because now my favourite Star Wars fact naturally incorporates my seething hatred of Disney.
I can't say I care anything about Star Wars canon, but "anything published before 2014 from within the Star Wars universe is considered not canon" makes me irritated.
Tales from the Mos Eisley Cantina is really, really good. It expands and enriches the stories of characters that had like a single second of screentime and makes you care about them in ways you never imagined you would. It's my favorite Star Wars book! I'm a little biased because of nostalgia, though...
NSFW:
Tap for spoiler
I have so many questions that I will never ask
Fascinating
Jizz Wizard
"I cast, PRE-MATURE EJACULATION!"
You have six fingers on your right hand... someone was looking for you.
That's not what I meant when I said bust a nut.
"I CAST! SPONTANEOUS BUSTIONS"
...I don't know....but he probably comes on time...
A wizard, as we all know, is never late nor he is early.
Another way of saying "cum bender"
I want to be a cum bender. That sounds fun.
Male porn star/escort, fertility specialist, or star wars cantina musician?
don't forget super gay klansman
Did you think you'd be saying that sentence when you woke up today?
Means he really enjoyed college and his parents are probably pissed for several reasons
Jizz wizzard
He was one of Jeff Healey's sidemen?
The sorcerer Jezebel