They can all draw from company documents and data, remember their decisions, and trace back reasoning for that if you want to follow up on why they decided to do certain things.
Things that real executives won’t do.
this post was submitted on 23 Sep 2026
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I mean, they aren't actually remembering reasons, they're coming up with reasons after the fact.
I am left wondering if you mean human-CEO or LLM-CEO here
A machine so stupid, it indistinguishable from a human.
The real Turing test
Oh, things that real executives actually do...
This is how AI should be used.
I’m not comfortable with them driving or making movies, why the fuck would I want one leading?
That being said, the C-suite is WELL overdue for a taste of their own medicine.
Most C-suits I've encountered are not competent so an LLM replacing them would probably not be worse than the current state we are in.
This one right here. A) They already work at this crazy abstracted layer and B) They are often ... yeah... um, either not competent or out of touch - Nepotism and cronyism has run wild in corporate America at least.
My partner and I often joke about this - That LLMs would do a better job than current execs. We both work at a layer where we still have to do work based on very specific, rigid criteria (I'm in systems, she's in contracts), but still both high enough that we have contact with C-suite. It's bonkers how crazy and not-good these people are, and we've each worked for a few companies at the layer we are at... it's fairly consistent.
Edit: Just as an anecdote: One of my companies brought on a C-suite who came from another large company and another one before that and another one before that. He was terrible, but this was expected - his whole schtick is to come into that position in companies and figure out the most cutthroat ways to outsource, which leaves those departments in massive disarray but makes the company more money in the short term, then he jettisons away to another company. It's bad out there. Oh right, and he proselytized Christianity in meetings... that was weird.
I used to think like that until I got one manager using LLMs for everything. And yes it is a disaster as well.
Middle managers do something. You may loathe it, but there is value in coordination. What do suits do?
Just get a D-20
It's probably the one thing AI can do, considering how much they all fuck up.
LLMs are great at pushing out a lot of words. Sometimes with meaning, most of the time ... eh.
Who else would you replace with it? It's a wonder it took them so long.
They just relabeled that fruit fly brain scan, didn't they. Can't blame them. It's undoubtedly still more effective than most corporate executives.
Think of how much money the company will be saving! Profit will go through the roof!
Well if they want to truly replicate the mindset of a c-suite suit they need to make priority number one doing anything and everything to maximize this year's bonus while continuing to network relentlessly instead of doing anything work related so that they have another ship to jump to and capsize once this one goes under.
It will never cease to amaze me that honestly this seems like the entire CEO's resume. It is just go to from one to the next to the next, making just adsorbent amounts of money, to just randomly resign at some point and go to the next place for even more money. Then companies spend more and more and more to get these people to show up and jump ship again.
Always blaming the "market" for all the bad times, and praising the "hard work" of the executives for good times. Firing all the people that actually DID the work.
Workers never have a chance to gain ground because the CEO is making 100 employees worth of money to sit in their high tower and quit later.
CEOs are fall-guys - think of them like figureheads.
Predicted by the Twilight Zone
ETA Yeah, our C-Suite employees are very rich nowadays, so much that it's difficult for them to not fail upwards when they make stupid (or harmful) decisions.
Also human upper management and owners resent their own workforce, hence RTOs, efforts to micromanage them, denial of breaks and so on, all of which drastically reduce morale and productivity. This figures in to the hope that AI will replace human workers (almost) entirely, even if AI systems require more cost and maintenance and are less reliable.
But we don't train AI based on logic, rather we train it on what's been done before, hence, for example, predictive policing programs carry the same racial biases that the human-run justice system does, on which they are based. So AI executives may carry the same resentment-fueled policies that their human counterparts do.
Also if they're entirely advisory, well, C-suite folk are not great at listening to advice. They tend to believe they're the smartest guy in the room.
Oh, so the AIs will be the same, so there is no reason not to get rid of the CEOs? If they read reports on what works, they can learn. Egos don't work in ones and zeros, and shareholders only care about money.
Fuck the C-suite. Let's do this!
Just freeing up that CEO grotesquely huge bonus money will put the entire globe on health care. Thanks AI! /s
Thats a lot of work for a pop up that says "is it done yet?"
I've always believed that the reason executives were so confident in AI is because they saw how effective it was at replacing their own work. It's not even much different from just doing whatever Gartner says or their competition is doing.
That is the thing though, they don't have any actual work. In theory, they simply ingest data and spit out logical decisions based on that data. In reality, the data has been so selectively filtered and manipulated at every layer of management on the way up that it becomes functionally meaningless. Executives are so bad at making the right decisions that their subordinates actively hide what's really happening from them.
Further, executives serve no useful function beyond tricking employees into feeling like they matter and the company cares about them. This is why they have hour long all-hands meetings where they communicate no useful information but constantly repackage obvious business goals like "sell more stuff" as "increase sales velocity" because they think using the right keywords is the same thing as intelligence. This performative but ultimately useless behavior is the primary reason for their exorbitant salaries. They distract everyone from the reality that the company is stealing all the money the business generates.
Sum all that up and you get a superfluously verbose moron working with bad data to make decisions that have, at best, marginal impact on the stated goal of the organization and consumes a hugely inflated amount of resources in the process. That does sound like the perfect human equivalent of an LLM to me.
they simply ingest data and spit out logical decisions based on that data.
And that's exactly what LLMs are good at. Okay, they're probabilistic and not logical, but the end result is similar, especially since humans often fail at logic. But it's undeniable LLM can go through lots of data much better than CEOs.
that's too easy, you could replace them with nothing
Even nothing has more substance than a CEO..
The Great AI War
Sweet sweet sweet! Love it!
‘Bout time.
Fools! That's exactly what was missing from creating Skynet! The workers were replaced with slop bots, now management gets replaced by slop bots too! It's slop bots all the way down! Run for the hills!