this post was submitted on 03 Jul 2026
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Atheist Memes

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[–] Kaligalis@lemmy.world 34 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

"Clearly, god is testing you and your kids. I will not risk hell by helping you cheat in his test."

[–] III@lemmy.world 13 points 3 days ago

I would prefer:

"I know, which is why I am giving it for free to a single mother of 5 children who is also interested."

[–] TheStaffmaster@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

practice Calvinism, get Calvinisim

[–] doingthestuff@lemy.lol 54 points 3 days ago (4 children)
[–] auzy1@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago

It only seems fake because they cut off the part that they said "sir.. sorry, I will give it to you for free"

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[–] Generica@lemmy.world 107 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

We lived in Texas fifteen or twenty years ago and sold a bedframe on Craigslist. This guy showed up with his young son, gave my husband an envelope that presumably had cash in it, and started hauling the bed frame out. Fortunately he opened the envelope before they left and it had a religious flyer in it, no money. He showed me and I stopped the guy and was like, where's our money? He said that he was taking it for church charity and that he thought the bedframe was free. I called him out for being a fucking liar in front of his kid and threw him out. He didn't think anyone would give him any shit in front of the little boy but he learned better.

[–] binarytobis@lemmy.world 48 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (3 children)

An envelope is a huge red flag, seen too many online marketplace deals to accept anything but visible cash. The audacity of that man.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 12 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

All my ads end with: "Cash ONLY, no apps, no exceptions. All exchanges made at the (Local) Police Station."

Very clear, and yet people still want to pay by app, or meet somewhere else, like at a gas station NEAR the police station. I often hear "I'm not comfortable going near the police station," and I think "That's exactly why I do it at the police station."

[–] Doc_Crankenstein@slrpnk.net 10 points 3 days ago (7 children)

Laughing that you think being near a police station is doing you any favors. Pigs are more likely to tell you to shove off than give a shit about your problems.

No one in their right mind should ever feel comfortable being near a police station.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 1 points 2 days ago

And you will never own one of the beautiful guitars that I've rescued, cleaned, repaired, restrung, set up properly, and sold cheap because I want to help someone else get off on their guitar journey on the right foot.

First of all, we don't go INTO the police station. The exchange takes place in the parking lot, where there is a SIGN that specifically says it it a safe place for social media exchanges because it is video-monitored. ALL police stations have an exchange spot these days, it's not only normal, it's the RECOMMENDED way to make an exchange.

Nobody is sniffing up anybody for weed, as one poster soeculated. That's just childish weed paranoia. That's so 20th century. Who worries about that these days?

Nobody hates cops more than me, trust me, but that doesn't mean they can't be useful to me on my terms. I've done this MANY times, and I've only had anyone approach me one time, and it was the last time I met someone. I met them at a different police station that was closer to them, and while we were talking, a police car pulled into the lot. It was the end of their shift, but they saw a couple of civilians talking so they asked if the could help with anything. I just said No, they're buying this guitar from me, and they said Cool, and walked away. They seemed pleased to not have to engage further, I think they only approached because they felt obligated to check it out, in case the boss was watching.

There are a lot of scammers, or worse, trying to get me to meet anywhere else. Like when I get a message at midnight on a Saturday night for some obscure McGuffin I'm selling, willing to pay an extra fee if I'll meet them somewhere weird, but it has to be RIGHT NOW, late at night, because they can't possibly wait until Sunday morning to get this thing that is not essential to anyone. Sure, you're not going to mug me, steal the McGuffin AND my car.

The only people who think it's weird to meet at a police station are people who DON'T buy stuff online. People who do, are totally comfortable with it, because they understand that it protects BOTH of us. Those who won't, are up to something.

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[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (3 children)

Tbf there's plenty reasons other than "robbing you" that people wouldn't like cops, personally mine is "I constantly smell like weed which is illegal here and I don't want to jeopardize my freedom," for some others it may be "I'm black," etc.

That said they can't get mad if you're unwilling to do the deal in another highly public place. If I asked "can we do it at the nearby gas station" and you said "no" I'd maybe think you're overly cautious but that's your right, I'm being overly cautious too about not getting arrested for smoking weed so I get it, "ok good luck, not for me then."

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (2 children)

Just saw a video of someone exchanging a bike at a busy WaWa, and the guy jumped on the bike and rode off. Being in a busy public place does not protect you at all.

Besides, the cops have to get close enough to sniff you, and they aren't bothering with a couple of locals in the parking lot handing a guitar back and forth. You'd have to walk all the way out there, and that sounds like work, where are the donuts?

And besides again, it's the 21st century, nobody gives a shit about weed. If you're that paranoid, maybe you should cut back a bit. I've probably smoked your weight in weed, and I've never been that flakey about cops.

[–] ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 days ago

Keep it chained until cash in hand, rookie mistake. Also still not super common especially if it's you and a friend, it happens but eh.

And besides again, it's the 21st century, nobody gives a shit about weed.

In your state maybe lol, some states still literally put you in jail for weed, and the cops love doing it because it's easy to catch, not risky like real criminals, and boosts their numbers. In some states you'd be safer open carrying a stolen handgun than hiding an ounce in your bag, they won't get close enough to read your serial numbers but god forbid if you smell like you're fun.

[–] MutilationWave@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

I was pulled over for speeding a couple weeks ago and the pig pulled the I smell marijuana on me. I smoke weed, but I was out of town working. Didn't smoke any. I've never even smoked in my truck, and I didn't have any on me. Clean clothes freshly showered. I got a little rude with him, we had a staring contest, and he went back to his vehicle. When he came back he apologized for accusing me, and still gave me a ticket.

He went on to preach about how if he hadn't said anything that would make him a lazy cop, and a lazy cop isn't a good cop. Motherfucker was about 5'8" and probably close to 300 pounds. Egg shaped. And he's got the audacity to say a lazy cop is a bad cop.

Cops will still try to ruin your life over weed. If he'd decided that I was high, I would've been tested, which would have been positive because weed stays in your system for a month or more, so I would've gotten a DUI. This would cost around $10,000 and cause me to lose my job.

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[–] Speculater@lemmy.world 23 points 3 days ago (3 children)

I even count it out when paying and ask them to count it again. I'm paranoid I might miscount!

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[–] this@sh.itjust.works 28 points 3 days ago (1 children)

The only thing I doubt in this story is the last 3 words.

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[–] Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 83 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Yeah I'm sure if Jesus was watching he would agree she is out of line

[–] mkwt@lemmy.world 74 points 4 days ago (5 children)

Jesus operated a carpentry business. I'm sure he knows all about dealing with difficult customers.

[–] CuddlyCassowary@lemmy.world 50 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (4 children)

He quit to become the Messiah, didn’t he? That was probably easier than retail customer service.

[–] rockSlayer@lemmy.blahaj.zone 29 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

I literally led the campaign to form a 600 person union. I was buried in bullshit from the company every single day for over 3 years.

Still preferable to when I worked at Aldi.

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[–] SethTaylor@lemmy.world 9 points 2 days ago (2 children)

If God were real he'd be laughing his ass off at this own

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[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 35 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Jesus is watching your kids suffer and does nothing.

And he's omnipotent and omnipresent, and does NOTHING.

If Jesus doesn't give a fuck about your 4 sad kids, lady, I got nothing for you lol

[–] SanicHegehog@lemmy.world 14 points 3 days ago (4 children)
[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Or: Have you tried Vishnu?

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[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Feel bad for her kids, she obviously gaslights her kids with this shit too.

[–] ChaoticEntropy@feddit.uk 10 points 3 days ago (1 children)

She's obviously a scamming reseller.

[–] Doc_Crankenstein@slrpnk.net 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I've known enough entitled religious freaks that the jury is still out on this.

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Yeeeep.

I grew up in such a family, surrounded by other such families.

People who aren't from that just don't believe you when you tell them how awful and insane these people often are... and that's actually been not taken seriously enough, for so long, that we just now have theocratic fascists in many prominent government positions now, and live in a fascist state.

[–] TotallyWorthLife@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

People didn't see fascist be 1:1 with past facists and thought "nah, not the same, you are overreacting".

Actually, I think even if they had been 1:1 with them, people would have found excuses.

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[–] db2@lemmy.world 25 points 4 days ago (1 children)

There are real examples of this, why did you feel the need to make a fake one

[–] HowdyLemmy@lemmy.zip 33 points 3 days ago (3 children)
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[–] Mulligrubs@lemmy.world 17 points 3 days ago (1 children)

She's one of the good apples, hasn't even drowned her kids in the tub once!

o7

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[–] ChaoticEntropy@feddit.uk 6 points 3 days ago

Seems like Jesus is pretty adept at telling this person no as well, given their circumstances.

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