this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2026
247 points (99.2% liked)

Not The Onion

21992 readers
1155 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 3 years ago
MODERATORS
all 42 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] foodandart@lemmy.zip 58 points 3 weeks ago (5 children)

I was an IA stagehand in the early 2000's.. NGL, the stage breakdown after a GWAR show was one of the stickiest, slipperiest, goopiest "outs" I've ever done. Not even the Lippizaner Stallions (and those horses are fed some weird food that makes their poop toxic, which is wild, since horse poop is the least offensive of any large animal) were as messy.

GWAR puts on a highly theatrical, great show.. If you get a chanct to see them.. By all means.. take it.

Not surprised President Peevishness can't handle the heat. So typical for the thin-skinned one.

[–] HotsauceHurricane@lemmy.world 16 points 3 weeks ago

One of the best concerts I've ever seen. Soooo much blood! And watching el presidente get disemboweled was rather neat

[–] RebekahWSD@lemmy.world 13 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Hello stagehand! My dad was one. Good luck! Be safe!

[–] foodandart@lemmy.zip 4 points 3 weeks ago
[–] farmgineer@nord.pub 11 points 3 weeks ago

Gwar shows are a lot of fun so seconding this; go if you get a chance (and maybe bring a change of clothes).

[–] snoons@piefed.ca 10 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Ahhh I miss IA. The only time in my life I was paid $1000 to stand around for three hours because the road crew forgot about us.

[–] mic_check_one_two@lemmy.dbzer0.com -1 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Not helping the general “IA are all lazy” stereotype. There’s a reason your pants pockets are called “union gloves”. It’s because every stagehand has a story about seeing a bunch of IA workers standing around wearing union gloves, while the rest of the crew is busting their asses.

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 5 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah those evil unions ensuring fair pay and good working conditions. Not like you and your manly man can do attitude!

[–] PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

Damn, y'all really hate Iowa huh?

[–] unabart@sh.itjust.works 58 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

I have seen GWAR: crucify the pope, disembowel George Bush, split Paris Hilton in half, rip babies out of protestors, shove a giant cross up a priest’s ass, chop off a skinhead’s head and throw it into a living toilet and stuff Henry Rollins into a giant meat grinder. Powerful fun. GWAR shows were the best. It’s cartoon violence. Even at it’s most patently offensive, it’s hilarious.

[–] guitarfosec@infosec.pub 24 points 3 weeks ago

If Trump had seen them chop off Obama’s head at Riot Fest like I did, he would be celebrating them and feeding them Arby’s at the White House.

[–] MML@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 weeks ago

So like a Mola Ram C-section? I like GWAR a decent bit I guess but that doesn't really seem to go with the others in the group just makes me wonder the context.

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 35 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

He also sent the secret service to interrogate Eminem. He’s such a pathetic baby.

[–] tomiant@piefed.social 2 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago) (1 children)

"I was the one who told them to put a bag over your head. The secret service doesn't do that, the CIA does, but not the secret service. I made them do that, and it was very cool and based."

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago

lol yea that movie was on point

[–] Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world 32 points 3 weeks ago (3 children)

They say they killed 4 decades worth of presidents and never got any call from secret service. I promise you, thats because Clinton was too busy getting laid and playing the saxaphone, Bush was too busy with 9/11, Obama was too busy breaking barriers and dealing with his own death threats, and Biden......honestly, Biden is so old I wouldn't be surprised if he never had a clue what was going on around him.

You think any of them give a fuck, or have even heard of GWAR?

But I guarentee you, tRump was googling his own name, trying to find people praising him. Came across some entertainment story covering GWAR. So tRumps name came up as a death story. His little fee-fees got a boo-boo, and sent the literal secret service to deal with it.

This is who we're dealing with as our president.

Hey, quick question. Honest question. Does anyone have any arguement to be made for how the united states shouldn't officially be labeled as a fascist country?

[–] yakko@feddit.uk 28 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm pretty sure "antifa labelled as terrorists and anti-American" is about as officially fascist as you're going to get.

You don't think it had his secret police rounding up "undesirables" in the streets and throwing them into "detention" centers

[–] deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz 17 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

shouldn’t officially be labeled as a fascist country?

There's no 'official' registry of fascist states.

To be clear, it's still a fascist shit hole.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago

Californian here. Regretfully, I have no argument. We'll get her back, but I have no doubt it will hurt

[–] Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world 26 points 3 weeks ago (2 children)

Every president before has given zero-fucks when criticized or joked about. Yet this orange kiddie-diddler lashes out uncontrollably and clearly can't take a joke. How many times has he threatened to pull a channel's broadcasting license over this. That some toxic fragile ego tiniest-dick energy.

[–] zarathustrad@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Welcome to the terror watch list, citizen.

Your documented history of criticism of Facisim is a red flag.

Now, don't start getting critical of unregulated crony capitalism or the masked men will show up.

[–] modus@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

Careful. He might threaten to revoke your internet access.

[–] PattyMcB@lemmy.world 25 points 3 weeks ago

Art is free speech. Fuck that fascist fuck!

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 17 points 3 weeks ago

Now this is what fragile masculinity looks like.

[–] samus12345@sh.itjust.works 16 points 3 weeks ago

The difference is fascism.

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 8 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

theyve done this to trump before, not sure why its an issue now. he must be bored or something

[–] VelvetPinkOtter123@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago (4 children)

Seen them during the first election

They killed Hillary, Trump, and Bernie

Trump was naked and wearing a cartoon sack of money for clothes, Hillary was sick and kept vomiting blood, and Bernie was old, died first, and came back as a mutated super monster that tried to eat everyone and had to be killed

The story, if you can call it that, was that Gwar were running for president of the universe and the only way to win was to kill your competition

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 5 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

when my dad saw them they had trump shoot blood at the audience out of a bullet hole in his heart

they had kamala harris diarrhea blast the audience

[–] LePoisson@lemmy.world 2 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

That sounds super awesome. I'm not really one to go to concerts and shit like this (disturbingly close to 40 now and a layabout) but that definitely seems like a sick AF show. Probably fun as hell

[–] VelvetPinkOtter123@lemmy.world 1 points 3 weeks ago

GWAR concerts are always rad. The music is second to the actual show

But you will get covered in fake blood (it's pretty much just water) so wear a white shirt and if it's cold outside, bring a change for the car

[–] vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 weeks ago

I like how Bernie clearly gets a bit more respect compared to the others. Like they're clearly poking fun at him still but in a way where I feel like there's no active malice involved.

[–] zarathustrad@lemmy.world 1 points 2 weeks ago

Well I enjoy the "deep political commentary" where the corpse of democratic socialism seeks vengeance and must be put down by the uni party.

GWAR is so deep/s. (Edit or did I mean derp/S.)

[–] als@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Hadn't heard of these guys before. Streisand effect go brrr

[–] myrrh@ttrpg.network 1 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

...they mightn't be as well known with the elderly or younger crowd but if you were born in the last three decades of the twentieth century and you haven't heard of GWAR, then you just haven't been paying attention...

[–] LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 6 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

When I worked at WotC around 2010 my boss told me back in the 90s GWAR wanted to be their house band, and used to show up at the company regularly to make pitches.

[–] nocturne@slrpnk.net 1 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

With the number of nerdy art students associated with the band, that does not surprise me. Other than the logistics between the two home bases (the ~~Dairy~~ Slave Pit in Richmond VA and WoTC in Seattle WA.

[–] pastermil@sh.itjust.works 5 points 3 weeks ago

I guess it was the Secret Service after all.