they call them fingers but I never see them fing.
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Oh, there they go
Oh wait, there they go
TIL our primate cousins have some bigass hands

Oh no
Likely better for climbing stuff I suppose
I find it very worrying that both fingers in the photo have the exact same fingerprint.
They... they don't though. It's similar, but not identical... you know, like Fingerprints...
Right? There's clear differences if you actually look. Yes, they're similar, which is the whole point of the post.
its ai slop
10 years ago on Reddit:

what makes you claim that?
Sir this is a lemmy’s, everything is AI slop here according to some people
Also a slip of the slop tongue there
chimpanzees have a bit more of a bulge in them fingers, and if u look close enough the print on both the fingers in this image is same...
If a koala were to go on a spree, however....
... everything would be infected with Chlamydia
Koalas have nearly identical fingerprints as well:
article about koala finger prints
no pictures of koala fingers
😑
I feel like there's not a lot of overlap between what we consider to be a major crime and chimp crimes. In other words, they aren't going to hide the fact that they murdered a dude, and theft is not something we'd be trying to prosecute them for.
Who would be the defense attorney? Clarence Darrow?
He got monkey finger
Wait a second...how did they get that chimp finger.
They aren't exactly passive creatures who hold still for a photo.
You cut it off didn't you.....
You monster!!!

No!!! I don't want a freaking toe.
Stop defiling corpses you sicko.
Now go put that back where you found it.
They obviously made a wish using a monkey's paw.
And as the monkey paw always does, it took their wish, then give them the finger.
Then they're out of luck, since chimpanzees aren't monkeys.
It corrupted their wish, like it always does.

"What? The chimp was already dead when I cut it off!" - OP, maybe
if you're the one who shot him, then you don't get to say "The chimp was already dead when I cut it off!"
Koalas have similar patterns like Humans.
Also, lots of Chlamydia
Stop having sex with Koalas.