this post was submitted on 27 Mar 2026
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Naive dingbats 
Oh its easy. You're a massive coward
Fuck Cars. That's what this is about, right? 
Driving in US cities is pretty terrible due to car-brained infra. But this dork doesn't comprehend any of that I'm sure.
Yeah the hard streets of Kansas City
I too am uncomfortable around cops.
Y'all, he's got a point — driving into a small town with this guy in it is much scarier than being alone in the wilderness.
Sent from my iPhone
Barbara Pitt
Southlake, Texas
He actually thinks that quote makes him look like a badass lol
"I'm afraid of Black people"
Being afraid in either scenario is silly lmao. In the wilderness, the apex predators don't want to harm you! Unless you live in polar/brown bear territory but that's not a problem in the US. You just gotta do your own thing. Living in irrational fear all the time is such a conservative mood
Nah the actual wilderness will happily fuck you up. Don't fool around in the woods.
There's a small population of grizzlies around these parts so the conventional wisdom is if it's a black bear you yell at it to fuck off but if it's brown you better hope it's not hungry
Those glizzies dont stand a chance against me
What if he just really hates driving?
I bet he finds most things hard to explain
Like object permanence
They recently made open carrying legal in my (US) state. My work takes me to grocery stores across a few different counties, of varying rurality. It makes me laugh out loud to see some chud at his neighborhood Publix after church on Sunday strapped with his cute little pistol and holster. Motherfucker you are surrounded by YOUR PEOPLE. What are you afraid of? Hm?
My state passed constitutional carry a couple years back, and to celebrate a ton of people were just taking their ar-15 everywhere they went. Me and the rest of the patrons at chain bbq restaurant got barrel swept multiple times by a chud who was carrying his AR across his chest with the sling around his neck, using it as an arm rest.
I feel like self defense is justified when being barrel swept by a 5.56 rifle
It's probably me. Well, not me exactly. I'm a queer commie but I'm not brown so I pass okay.
Is this the southern version of tips fedora meme?
Wearing my awkward chest holster to pipe smoking camp.
This is what happens when the campy need to accessories conflicts with the innate fear of an American man being perceived as feminine. Instead of a useful sling bag, you get a useless/dangerous gun holster.
There is no more of a campy fashion obsessed person than someone pretending to be a cowboy. I work in the southwest in orthotics and prosthetics and have had full grown men have crying tantrums when I tell them that the brace I built to help them walk again won't work with cowboy boots. "Do you know how much these cost, they're hand stitched!" Is something Ive had screamed at me multiple times. My dude, you work for paycom. They would rather be physically impaired than than give up their suburban cowboy dress gimmick.
This is really, really funny, and I want to thank you for posting. I needed a laugh today.
Even better, I'm pretty sure that's a vape not a pipe
Ceci n'est pas une pipe
You have got to be kidding me, just smoke a pipe!
I can only imagine the tobacconist is somewhere in the scary town, whereas the vape tree is somewhere out there in the wilderness.
Is nothing sacred!?!?
Every person like him is really a scared little child
Type of person who is afraid to eat vegetables.
Same type of guy who would lose his shit during the 'women choose the bear' meme
And yet, plenty of people live and walk around the town completely unarmed.
Here I am again, a rural amerikkkan hexbear, making one comment in the morning defending my rural comrades, then another wondering why I even bother.
I was with abujch of chuds talking about how theh wanted to wear their plate carriers when we were getting dinner downtown. They really think this and it's just icky. At the same time, it isn't a bad thigk to be comfortable in the wilderness, but that's only 25% of the story here.
Lol, I dislike ppl too but I'm also got a wimp.