this post was submitted on 14 Mar 2026
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Bean virus (hexbear.net)
submitted 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago) by chgxvjh@hexbear.net to c/memes@hexbear.net
 

Since the 90s my parents have been terrified of computer viruses. A couple weeks ago they told me they started using DoorDash so I warned them about the Bean Virus, where you just start getting random cans of beans delivered to your house.

Since then I've been anonymously DoorDashing them cans of beans.

Dad> Picture of dad holding a can of beans

Dad> I think we got the bean virus. This was on the porch this morning.

Poster> Yeah that's the bean virus. Whatever you do don't scan the barcode.

Dad> ๐Ÿ‘

Dad> more beans this morning. I called door dash and they have never heard of bean virus

Dad> beans again

top 17 comments
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[โ€“] axont@hexbear.net 15 points 20 hours ago

In communist America all citizens will receive an allotment of beans delivered daily

[โ€“] Carcharodonna@hexbear.net 26 points 23 hours ago

How do I catch this bean virus. I desperately want free beans.

[โ€“] JustSo@hexbear.net 20 points 23 hours ago (2 children)
[โ€“] Lussy@hexbear.net 5 points 21 hours ago

Please advise

[โ€“] CthulhusIntern@hexbear.net 7 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Plot twist: The parents know there's no such thing as the bean virus, they're just pretending to fall for it so that the poster keeps sending them free beans.

[โ€“] Owl@hexbear.net 3 points 19 hours ago
[โ€“] Rom@hexbear.net 16 points 23 hours ago

I see this as an absolute win beanis

[โ€“] Dort_Owl@hexbear.net 14 points 23 hours ago* (last edited 23 hours ago)

I feel evil laughing at this

Hehehehe

[โ€“] Florn@hexbear.net 6 points 20 hours ago

Poster should extend the bit. Send his parents a pic of a can of beans and say he got the beans virus from texting with them.

[โ€“] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 9 points 22 hours ago

woke bean virus

[โ€“] Rojo27@hexbear.net 12 points 23 hours ago

You've bean beanedbean

[โ€“] blunder@hexbear.net 6 points 21 hours ago (1 children)
[โ€“] KuroXppi@hexbear.net 4 points 22 hours ago (1 children)