this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2026
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Chapotraphouse

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If it were me I simply wouldn't volunteer for an imperial death machine

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[–] Thordros@hexbear.net 42 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Tietjens, Coady, Khork, and Amor? What kinda Sleve McDichel-ass names are these? Is this AI?

[–] UmbraVivi@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago

The spokesperson who made the announcement: admiral-biederman

[–] Blakey@hexbear.net 8 points 1 month ago

Khork

, Admiral Jhimes C

[–] segfault11@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

we are cody khork, we carry the flame,

[–] came_apart_at_Kmart@hexbear.net 1 points 4 weeks ago (1 children)

ugh, Tietjens is the name of one of my favorite tragic/hilarious characters, played expertly by Benedict Cumberbatch in "Parade's End", a miniseries adaptation.

he's this WW1 era lord from a very, very old noble family who basically lives in self-imposed emotional agony to uphold traditional notions of duty and honor that never really existed and certainly don't matter anymore.

this scene, the one that had me laughing my ass off, is his CO going off on him after realizing he has been misleading everyone, torching his own reputation for years just to protect the "honor" of cruel, narcissistic wife who has been trying to drive him to suicide through very public infidelity among other actions.

a truly bonkers character.

[–] HexReplyBot@hexbear.net 1 points 4 weeks ago

I found a YouTube link in your comment. Here are links to the same video on alternative frontends that protect your privacy:

[–] SacredExcrement@hexbear.net 30 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Am I supposed to feel bad? The US attacked Iran unprovoked, and these people were all volunteers for one of the most openly violent and wantonly destructive empires in history

Fuck them

[–] ThermonuclearHoxha@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

From inside the empire, yes, actually — they think that US military casualties (especially if there are none) above all else are the biggest factor to justify military action was successful to the US public

[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

yeah but public sentiment has literally never mattered. the ruling class does what it wants.

[–] trabpukcip@hexbear.net 26 points 1 month ago (1 children)

"you four, for no reason in particular, stand in front of this wrinkly flag and have your picture taken. Okay great, enjoy the rest of your very short life"

[–] Biggay@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago

didnt even steam the flag for gods sake, fucking armed forces dont even have any drip anymore

[–] pinguinu@lemmygrad.ml 22 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Even the US army can't iron their flags. Another sign of decline

[–] PorkrollPosadist@hexbear.net 29 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

It's extra funny because there's an official flag folding procedure (which ultimately produces a triangle) and these clearly were just folded like a stack of bed sheets. Like they were just removed from a vacuum shrink-wrap inside a plastic Amazon envelope.

[–] supafuzz@hexbear.net 33 points 1 month ago

Fresh out of the temu package

[–] supafuzz@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago

Slob empire

[–] Krem@hexbear.net 20 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)
[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago

we have the best emojis folks

[–] hullabaloo@hexbear.net 18 points 1 month ago

They look like the four humors

[–] JoeByeThen@hexbear.net 17 points 1 month ago
[–] PorkrollPosadist@hexbear.net 16 points 1 month ago

I wonder if the toilets in Hell work any better than the ones on the USS Gerald Ford.

[–] TheSpectreOfGay@hexbear.net 14 points 1 month ago

sorry guys, have to go die to blow up a bunch of school children rn, see you later

[–] CommCat@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago

bozos fighting for the Imperialist death machine run by the Pedo Epstein Class

[–] Evilsandwichman@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago

I hope it was painful

[–] WasteTime@hexbear.net 13 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A killer named "amor" LOL! (that's love in Spanish)

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Don't go telling them that

They'll start wearing shirts saying "Iran Killed Love" on them

[–] CupcakeOfSpice@hexbear.net 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I mean, it is what we did when ICE killed Pretty and Good.

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

I didn't do that

My shirt said "Weed Limit 69", mostly because my shirt that said "Fuck ICE and if you support them, fuck you too" got stuck in the mail for an extra week

[–] Le_Wokisme@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

hex-crab hex-crab hex-crab hex-crab

they are not sending their best

[–] KimJongFun@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

RIP Private Moby

[–] newmou@hexbear.net 12 points 1 month ago

“Yaoooo, what’s good y’all the name’s Coady dawg”

[–] coolusername@hexbear.net 11 points 1 month ago

you guys see the gov report on why they died? it reads like an OSHA accident report

[–] Blorbis83@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

Good. More.

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 10 points 1 month ago

Four crackers down, still got several sleeves of saltines to go!

[–] Meh@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

Skill issue

[–] SootySootySoot@hexbear.net 9 points 1 month ago

I went to go murder some people apropos of nothing and died! So unfair capitaldcolon

[–] WhoaSlowDownMaurice@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago
[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 6 points 1 month ago
[–] Beaver@hexbear.net 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

White Bear Lake soldier among 6 service members killed in Iran war

Minneapolis–Saint Paul understanders know what that means

hitler-detector

[–] ConcreteHalloween@hexbear.net 4 points 1 month ago
[–] MolotovHalfEmpty@hexbear.net 3 points 1 month ago

May they be proud symbols of leadership that inspire their countrymen in uniform to follow! rat-salute-2

[–] peeonyou@hexbear.net 2 points 4 weeks ago

thumb and three fingers