I is no longer asking.
I can has cheezburger.
this post was submitted on 22 Feb 2026
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"Yes, you can haz cheeseburger."
cheezburglar
~~Can~~ I haz cheeseburger
My cat stole a burger off a plate in my kitchen. I'd made a bunch for a group of friends, and I warned them to watch the cat, he was quick. No one really believed me, until we found a hamburger on my pillow. (I think I noticed he was absent, which was unlike him, so I went to check on him.)
My friends were stunned at how he did that with none of them noticing. Yep.
Allowing an animal to steal food is the right call most of the time, same for people really.
It's fine to steal from a company, but (literally) off another person's plate?
Off someone else's plate? And it's a sweet lil' ol' kitty cat?
Yes. When your opponent plays by animal rules, you play by animal rules. Stay paranoid fellas
"He who fights with monsters should look to it that he himself does not become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss meows back."
~ Freed "Rick Neat" Chair
I'm speaking in generalizations here, which I'll admit is virtually pointless, but I considered with my statement that generally speaking people don't steal food from the plates of their hungry peers.
I can see how you might have that internally, but the material imagery here is of something being stolen off a plate. It's directly at cross-purposes with what would be at the top of people's mind when interacting with the post (assuming they're not the type to sprint to comment before engaging with the post at all).
You're right. I should have put a bit more effort into assuring clarity as my statement does not make the necessary distinction that people should hold themselves to a higher standard than animals, which many people unfortunately do not.
Yeah, the very idea of discourse has been deconstructed so thoroughly that I can see someone saying "but humans are animals" as justification for being a monster. Or that you deserve to steal if you can find a gap in the laws preventing it.
…kitty.
That toothpick in the sandwich is a good toothpick. Got one in a sample about a month ago and I've been using it to eat olives.
I'm kidding! I'm kidding!
At least they didnt mark the spot.
Filming it is the right call. This way there can be no doubt as to what happened if someone is looking for the burger later, and they can get it comped by the restaurant without issue should they want another.
And with the whole table empty of people they had either already finished most of their meal/weren't that hungry, or it's a fake video.
Gimme that!
Robble robble.
I hope this was preplanned, and they didn't just passively watch a cat ruin someone's meal from a single table away.
Is AI?