This person's dom told them they have to write I WANT YOU TO NUT IN MY BUTT on LinkedIn as a punishment for their disobedience and this is the only way they could come up with to get away with writing that.
this post was submitted on 20 Feb 2026
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For posting all the anonymous reactionary bullshit that you can't post anywhere else.
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NUT IN MY BUTT
The lesser known sequel to Slob on my Knob
dog if that gym was playing triple 6 idk i'd go
Compromise...
nut in my butt... for JESUS
Ngl sounds like it would keep people pumped up. Unlike most if not all Christian music
Unironically a song about consensual sex is infinitely less offensive than the patriarchal, homophobic, colonialist, child-abusing, thought-policing abomination that is Christianity
I WANT YOU TO
NUT IN MY BUTT
NUT IN MY BUTT
NUT IN MY BUTT
NUT
NUT
NUT
NUT
I refuse to go to a gym unless they’re blasting Georgian chants.
Pie Iesus domine clunk
Dona eis requiem clunk
😂
I am married Christian man that goes to the gym regularly. I posted "I want you to NUT IN MY BUTT" on LinkedIn. Plz send me DMs.
The closest thing that has ever happened to this was the time I was at Planet Fitness and I used the 'Suggest a song' feature on the app to get them to play Just One Fix by Ministry
And they did
And all the seniors who were working out without headphones or ear buds went 
Great song btw
Oh yeah, love me some Ministry
I haven't really listened to them since the 90's, I should probably revisit that shit
He said his name was Jesus
When I'm done he'll be saying Oh God
You about to be crucified by my holy rod
JESUS IS COMING
Cuz I balls deep in him
[NSFW]
The Holey Trinity doing a Devil's Triangle is quite a divine apparition to receive.
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cmon dude, nutting in butts is what gyms are all about
also most of that story was irrelevant to his point
nutting in butts is what gyms are all about
The Village People song they don't want you to hear.
Then I put my headphones on, because I know how powerful nutting in my butt is and I won't allow that in my daydreams
I definitely won't post it publicly on LinkedIn so other people will know I'm thinking about it
And then everybody clapped
deadlifting to underoath and switchfoot
christian music is offensive because it's so terrible.
also, how am i gonna get this Men's Intermediate Twerking class pumped up at 8am on a Wednesday?
I don't go to gyms because I work outside and my free time is for entering a proverbial cryotube but is the give away this is fake the "a couple of extra wrong charges" part?
Like isn't it all membership based? How do they have wrong charges unless there's like a staff member walking around with a clip board billing them for whatever the hell?
the giveaway that it's fake is that it's on linkedin
Yeah but like- who's just accidently charging you at the gym I GOTTA know
Nah, that’s probably the most believable part about this, gyms are notoriously scummy with regards to surcharges and general douchebaggery.
No kidding? Alright it's rolling on logs in the river for me then.
Linkedin truly contains the dumbest material on the internet
I can personally attest this actually happened, and then OOP found the light of Allah and unhesitatingly recited the Shahada on the spot.
Converting to Islam in the holy month of Ramadan, what a blessed start into a new life.
Every single gym Ive been in has always played the most inoffensive crappy dance music that borders on elevator music and most of it is instrumental.
Most of the time my gym plays awful club remixes of pop songs, but there seems to be one cool staff member who gets her playlist of Evenescence and Linkin Park and Green Day. I don't usually listen to these kinds of bands, but my god there is nothing like doing a workout to Bring Me to Life
knuck if you buck?
now that is a pump up track
Brb changing my username to nutbutterbuttnutter
What's really strange is that he only hears it coming from the speaker that must be in change room when he's at the gym at 3:30 am. 
There really is a song that has those lyrics. Also if it's going to be gospel, at least let it have a beat and gritty bass line...
https://genius.com/The-teaming-sisters-nutt-in-my-butt-lyrics
Look what they have to do to mimic a fraction of her power
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