this post was submitted on 14 Feb 2026
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[–] Soulphite@reddthat.com 72 points 1 month ago (2 children)

You know, I would really believe this headline to be true. These childfuckers really are this God damn stupid. It probably is true even.

[–] CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world 9 points 1 month ago

God, I saw it was the Atlantic and I thought it was true till I read the article- this is where we are at

[–] SpruceBringsteen@lemmy.world 28 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Just wait until they find out it goes to CHINA at night.

[–] smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

1,000,000% tariff on Chinese sunlight.

[–] D_C@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 month ago

If you do that then they'll just steal the moon. Wait, the moon is real, right?

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 27 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The owner of the Atlantic was in the Epstein Files.

[–] silence7@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The owner is effectively Laurene Powell Jobs via the Emerson Collective which she put together. Pretty much every rich or famous person is in those files as a mention. It takes more than just "in the files" to incriminate a woman.

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Execute them all the world will be a better safer place for everyone. I’m sick of some having everything while others can’t even access healthcare. Shareholders deserve to die

[–] chiliedogg@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago

Bilbo Baggins is in the files. By conflating "in the files" with "took part in the crimes" a lot of innocent people will be falsely accused.

And that's the point.

Trump and team want so many innocent people to be called out that it provides cover for the guilty.

[–] OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Hahahahaha i love the on-

sees it's not the onion

[–] silence7@lemmy.world 13 points 1 month ago

To be absolutely clear: while The Atlantic tends to be reliable, this author of this piece is their humor columnist.

[–] hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 points 1 month ago (2 children)

What's really concerning is that I actually ate the onion here.

[–] captainlezbian@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago

I checked the source and was scared because why does a legitimate news source also do satire‽ We're past the point where obviously ridiculous things are obviously not true

[–] XeroxCool@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago

I mean, it was what, 4 years ago that a pro-oil lobby/marketing group made an actual "CO2 is life" commercial saying CO2 is good?

[–] RumorsOfLove@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 points 1 month ago

THE SUN'S NOT YELLOW, IT'S CHICKEN!

[–] umbraroze@piefed.social 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

...Is math related to science?
If the universe is so big, then why doesn't it fight me?

(Yeah, I know, I shouldn't be quoting Internet Historian, these could be stolen jokes. It's funny because these are the sort of jokes I could come up with)

[–] iamdefinitelyoverthirteen@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

That was such a disappointment. Dude is funny but he done fucked up.

[–] NatakuNox@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago
[–] purplerabbit@piefed.blahaj.zone 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

CW: Joke about suicide


BREAKING: Mass suicide reported at NASA.

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Aren’t Zionists always talking about their superior IQ? They seem like morons like every other group that touted genetic superiority in history.

[–] silence7@lemmy.world 0 points 1 month ago (1 children)

No. That's white supremacists.

[–] Formfiller@lemmy.world 1 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Well actually I’ve read a bunch of recent Zionist fundamentalist Israeli literature claiming genetic superiority. Epstein wrote extensively about his beliefs in this and the inferiority of Goyem in the files so what do you call that? I agree that most Zionists or Israeli’s in general are from European ancestry so they are in the socially constructed “white”category but what do you call this belief in superiority that is being used to justify genocide and the trafficking, raping and killing of Goyem children that Epstein talks about in the files? It does seem relevant here considering that our government, corporations and the presidency are clearly occupied by a fundamentalist Israel and this strange belief that they hold that they are superior and above international laws and human decency. It’s a problem

[–] silence7@lemmy.world 0 points 1 month ago

Epstein was trafficking in pretty standard white supremacist eugenics from what I read. I didn't see it written as Jewish supremacist, and he was routinely providing girls to non-jews

[–] Tollana1234567@lemmy.today 1 points 1 month ago

just like with RFK JR AND VACCINES, hes playing to flat earthers.