this post was submitted on 18 Jan 2026
273 points (94.2% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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top 23 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 69 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

He actually said this. It was at a rally in some town in Ohio and he said exactly this. Everyone stood up and cheered. One old lady literally ascended into heaven right there on the spot (old ladies do this from time to time). This all really happened and you can all trust me.

[–] aBundleOfFerrets@sh.itjust.works 23 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

I was there. I wouldn’t have missed it.

[–] danc4498@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago

I was the old lady that ascended to heaven.

[–] JasonDJ@lemmy.zip 7 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] popekingjoe@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago
[–] Klear@quokk.au 2 points 2 weeks ago

Shouldn't have missed his ear.

[–] Frozengyro@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

And then Einstein presented him a nobel for medicine and everyone clapped

[–] b_tr3e@feddit.org 9 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

The name is Epstein. Who ever heard of any "Einstein files"?

[–] blinfabian@feddit.nl 2 points 2 weeks ago

Einstein was a nickname for Jeffrey Epstein. It translates to "one stone" and was given to him after he and Trump got stoned in Switzerland ca. 2009. all real

[–] tkk13909@sopuli.xyz 21 points 2 weeks ago

MANY SUCH CASES

[–] halvar@lemy.lol 16 points 2 weeks ago

many such cases

[–] optissima@lemmy.world 16 points 2 weeks ago
[–] SoloCritical@lemmy.world 15 points 2 weeks ago

Thank you for your attention to this matter -DJT

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 9 points 2 weeks ago

See? This is how you shitpost with politics in but it’s still a shitpost.

[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] SatansMaggotyCumFart@piefed.world 3 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] eestileib@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 points 2 weeks ago

👍🏻

Excellent work sibling

[–] Evil_Shrubbery@thelemmy.club 8 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Butt babies happen!

[–] diabetic_porcupine@lemmy.world 8 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] BlackVenom@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Yaa... Am boy preggers... Sorry dad.

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

His stomach contents will be 15% semen (his own).

[–] Tartas1995@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 2 weeks ago

Bubba tells me that it might not only be his own

[–] Wilco@lemmy.zip 1 points 2 weeks ago

Finally some leadership out of this guy.