this post was submitted on 24 Nov 2025
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Aneurysm Posting

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[–] jqubed@lemmy.world 72 points 1 month ago (3 children)

If they can’t sell fountain drinks because they don’t have water they shouldn’t be open at all because they also don’t have water in their hand wash sinks.

[–] Asafum@feddit.nl 27 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

"washen yer hands make you gay. Jesus dint wash no hands, only feet an that's kinda based."

[–] sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 month ago

But... but... what about profits?

How can you forget profits?

[–] MeatPilot@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 month ago

Just don't flush the toilet and it's a reusable hand wash station.

[–] AntiBullyRanger@ani.social 25 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (3 children)

Southern? This reads like someone who doesn't know English was forced to write this.
Southern would be more like:

Aotta wate. No soda. Boss forgo o pay wate comp..

Nah. This a native speaker for sure. Just one who's also barely literate.

[–] Sludgeyy@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

You can tell it's not southern because they say soft drinks instead of coke.

"Dew ta nawt havin' wader we can't sail ya coke"

[–] wolfpack86@lemmy.world 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Depends where in the south. Eastern North Carolina would commonly say soft drinks. And confusing sale and sell is common as in spoken dialect it is a homophone. But not sail.

But anyway, this says soda drinks. Not sure who would call it that.

[–] Neverclear@lemmy.dbzer0.com 0 points 1 month ago

Y'all acting like the South can afford to print shit.

[–] Lembot_0005@lemy.lol 16 points 1 month ago (4 children)

Ok, can you translate it to standard English if "it makes sense" to you?

[–] saltnotsugar@lemmy.world 41 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Hark! The crystal clear liquid of life flows not for us, thus we cannot grant you the fountain drinks that you desire.

[–] ceenote@lemmy.world 16 points 1 month ago

Verily, that is a vexing conundrum.

[–] SnokenKeekaGuard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 1 month ago (1 children)

spoilerDue to not having water, we can't sell any soft drinks

[–] Lembot_0005@lemy.lol 6 points 1 month ago
[–] Bhaelfur@lemmy.world 8 points 1 month ago

"Due to not having water we can't sell any Soda Drinks

Sorry MGT"

[–] TexasDrunk@lemmy.world 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

I say you they ain't not got no water so them soda dranks is out. Mmhmm

[–] okwhateverdude@lemmy.world 10 points 1 month ago (1 children)

The "Sorry MGT" at the bottom is probably the saddest bit on this little condemnation on public education

[–] darkdemize@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 month ago

It wasn't an apology so much as it was a description

See also: "We ain't got no soda right now cause the city done put us under a boil order. Somethin' about a broke water main."

[–] MehBlah@lemmy.world 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Not to bad in a boston accent either.

[–] PumpkinEscobar@lemmy.world 6 points 1 month ago

Or scottish

[–] blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 1 month ago

Probably just ran out of post mix and blamed water to avoid seeming incompetent

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 4 points 1 month ago

You didn't specify which South.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 2 points 1 month ago

Is suppose there's a small chance that it's a joke.

[–] Safeguard@beehaw.org 2 points 1 month ago

MEGA: Make Education Great Again.