this post was submitted on 13 May 2025
333 points (94.2% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

31571 readers
4120 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
(page 2) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 1 points 2 days ago

Today its luggage. I'm gonna need a lube wale...a belube wale.

[–] Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I was leaning against this when I opened the post:

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Gates9@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 days ago

I keep telling my girlfriend that yes, bulk liquid soap has its advantages, but have we really done a thorough analysis of the potential second and third order consequences?

[–] Dicska@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago

Holy mackerel, it's the house!

[–] Enkers@sh.itjust.works 6 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Hairbrush. It'd fit fine, but it's got rubberized paint that's coming off the handle. :/

[–] And009@lemmynsfw.com 3 points 3 days ago

ER has seen worst

OK, there's actually a banana to my left, but I already did that today

[–] reddfugee@lemmy.world 8 points 4 days ago

My poor Blåhaj…

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

a nice soft blanket. not sure how much will fit but I bet when I take it out it'll feel like taking packing out of your sinuses after an infection.

I can BREATHE!

[–] Zomg@lemmy.world 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

At least it'll be warm?

[–] Zenith@lemm.ee 5 points 4 days ago

I’m at the DMV, a teenaged girl is sitting next to me 😬

[–] Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 5 points 4 days ago

I am currently regretting my choice to sit in the garden. About 20 concrete blocks.

[–] Hadriscus@lemm.ee 7 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago) (1 children)

Of all guitars, why did I choose a ten-string one

load more comments (1 replies)

There’s a window, but just outside the window is a tall skinny CACTUS

[–] ArtemisimetrA@lemm.ee 5 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Reading this on the toilet, literally it's toilet paper

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] altphoto@lemmy.today 3 points 3 days ago

Its just a big ol stuffy, I'll be fine after the surgery.

[–] mechoman444@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

I am currently taking a dump... So the entire bathroom door. 🥲

[–] MajesticElevator@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

Computer 👀

[–] banazir@lemmy.ml 7 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Well shit, I guess I have to re-enact 1 man 1 jar...

[–] kingpepe8006@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 days ago

Oh lawd not again

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] LoveSausage@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 3 days ago
[–] BluJay320@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 4 days ago

Not sure how a television is gonna fit, but here we go

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 4 points 4 days ago

I have to shove a whole fucking table up there? 😫

[–] ftbd@feddit.org 2 points 3 days ago

4 ft is about 1.2m - a Bo is typically around 1.8m

[–] baggins@lemmy.ca 7 points 4 days ago (2 children)

I'm lying on my right side in bed so I guess the ceiling?

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 6 points 4 days ago

Same, except mine has a fan on it. 🪦

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Rampsquatch@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] Zetta@mander.xyz 4 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I'm also in the bathroom, but the TP is on my right and to the left is the shower. No objects that aren't attached to the building. So, that'll be hard.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de 6 points 4 days ago (4 children)

A towel. Idk how im gonna make this work. Maybe if soaked with enough lube or oil 🤔

[–] acidbattery@lemm.ee 8 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Eww thats even worse

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] justme@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 4 days ago

The wall? I wonder how that's gonna work

[–] shipsnwolf@lemmy.blahaj.zone 5 points 4 days ago

Small metal filling cabinet that is wider than I am, death is what I get

[–] M137@lemmy.world 3 points 4 days ago

My bathroom sink... at least my bowels will be empty before it ends up inside me.

[–] naun@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

Large banana stuffie. Could be worse.

[–] lunachocken@lemm.ee 4 points 4 days ago
[–] Disorder6069@sh.itjust.works 1 points 3 days ago

Floor to ceiling window…

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›