If he's only looking at the front page, why is he even buying the newspaper? Can't he see it just by walking in front of the place?
this post was submitted on 07 Jan 2025
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You're right. Let's go home folks, the joke is over.
Wait, I demand a refund for the joke.
You didn't even buy it. You just walked past.
Bro did you even unfold the joke lmao
The joke I am looking for won't need to be
Well, it's better to burn out than to fade away.
The joke would have worked if he just went and looked at the front page but never bought the paper. No reason to have such a dumb oversight, it makes the joke worse.
See, the West even wants jokes more efficient.
No, no, you have to know, they don't understand our rebellion by working to rule - let the seller snap, not us...
...but, Ockam's Razor...
It's hopeless.
That's like stealing!
You wouldn't download a newspaper!
I think the joke would make more sense if the guy picked up the newspaper, unfolded it to see the entire front page, and then put it back and never bought it, day after day. The seller would still get mad because the guy never buys it, he only looks at the front page headline.
Maybe in Soviet era Russia, it is implied that you must purchase the newspaper before you unfold it?
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I think it's funnier as is personally. doesn't make sense but it's still funny
He is just veing nice to the seller and actually giving him business.
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For a year, the man just looks at the front page without buying the newspaper.
Why does he never die? the man asks. I bet it's because I don't buy the paper. If I buy the paper, then the man will die sooner.
So the man starts buying the paper.
Comedians hate this simple trick!
Not in Soviet Russia apparently.
take it easy
Holy shit I want this as a shirt because it applies to whomever the reader interprets and thats always a good thing.
I'm p sure quite some people would look at that and say “Not cool to wish someone dead, bro.”
Old joke.
Russian history books only need to be five words long.
"...And then, it got worse."
JEAN MARIE LE PEN REPOSE DANS LA PISSE 🎊🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉🥳🥳🥳🎊
Im just trying to imagine the level of state level lunatic copium that unleashes when Vladimir Putin dies. Imagine the theatrics and clownery that was North Korea when Kim Jong Il died, except its a country that's been radicalized and mobilized by fascist wartime propaganda, I quite think they'll start shooting each other out of rage and grief.
The entirety of NATO will have to preemptively go to the equivalent of DEFCON 2 upon learning that the tZar has died.
Not just that, but imagine the shitshow that .ml will be. They lose their minds if you so much as even think to criticize their beloved dictator.
I’m pretty sure they love him far more than Russians do.
what's .ml ?
Lemmygrad.ml and Lemmy.ml. There's also Hexbear.
I'd advise avoiding those instances. Block them if you can.
They have some valid takes on a lot of societal issues, buuuut yeah can be pretty hostile definitely
Im still new to lemmy and unsure how the whole thing works, I'm redditbrained.
Think of .ml as a Russian-run communist version of Reddit where the moderation is exponentially more strict and what you’re allowed to talk about is determined by those that run the instance.
Essentially it’s a near perfect example of what it would be like if North Korea and Russia united into one giant shithole of a political ideology, and then yarfed up its propaganda into one self-contained social media site.
I mean I understand the tankie thing, the instance thing was what I didnt understand.
There is no one “Lemmy”. Different people host different copies that sync with each other, but they all have their own moderators. Lemmy.ml is run by “davel” so just do a web search for “davel mod” to learn about the reputation they’ve earned.
Those are other Lemmy instances, like how we're on lemmy.world. "ml" as in "Marxism-Leninism", it's known to be full of tankies.
I think an easier way to understand it - anyone can host a lemmy instance, and they will talk to other lemmy instances. It’s like if anyone could make and host their own subreddits on their own websites, and they would by default be accessible from Reddit.
So I have a lemmy.world account (and I think you do too), but the person you responded to has a lemy.lol account. We have accounts on different websites, but they use the same language and can talk to each other. We see this conversation on lemmy.world, they see the same conversation on lemy.lol.
It helps to think of instances (Lemmy.ml is an instance) as an imaginary layer between reddit the platform/company and subreddits. Themselves miniature versions of reddit with their own subreddits, often overlapping thematically with the subsubreddits of other mini reddits. Sometimes these mini reddits have an over arching theme or vision, and sometimes they are just a hobby hosting exercise. But all of these miniature reddits can theoretically exchange posts and comments by choosing to federate with each other, by virtue of being under the same reddit platform.
Now remove reddit entirely and change the platform into a protocol and you're close enough for government work.
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Now that we are a one party state, this joke works for the USA.
"The United States is also a one-party state but, with typical American extravagance, they have two of them."
- Julius Nyerere
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This one is perfect for us French people!
Every morning I check in to Google news hoping to see the same. When Putin dies the world will literally erupt in a giant party and I'm stocked with all sorts of party favors and have my days off reserved!
On a side note, I wonder how it must feel to see and know that majority of the world will have a party on your death day. This has to be one of the most painful feelings in the world right? Assuming that monster has any feelings at all.
Who controls the nukes when he dies? “Giant party” is a naive framing of the situation.
eh, kinda pointless to worry about that. What am I supposed to do, hop in and defuse the nukes myself? I trust that the world powers keep shit in check and I'll just enjoy my party :)
Were at brezhnev levels of gerentocracy in the u.s. so maybe the leader just keeling over could be something to look forward to in these coming 4 years. I'll take mitch McConnell if that doesn't pan out though.
Am I crazy or should approve, disapprove and no answer always sum up to 100% of respondents? Or aren't the bars stacked?
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The blue line is what they say in public. The black line is what they answer when they trust it's anonymous.
Aha I always heard this told as a Polish joke, because he could see the first page without buying it..
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