no clue what we're going to do with our hair still >~< so complicated

I think my housemates are coming to hate me, they never seen to want to talk to me or spend time with me and always make plans with each other without including me. They don't seem to be interested in me or my life at all. They make decisions about the house without me and then just expect me to pay for things they buy for the house. One of them is a very good friend of ten years, and I think living with me has made him dislike me.

I've been spending a lot of time in my room alone lately because they seem to not want to talk to or see me. And I don't really want to see people who don't want to see me.

One day I will upgrade from a "service dog in training" and become a "service dog"

I have a sudden urge to kiss girls

It finally fucking happened: a white hair in my brush 😖😭

Got some dark purple nail polish today, really looking forward to it. I've been wanting purple for a while now

I'm scared that I might not be cis and in denial. I tell myself it's just me feeling like I don't want to / can't live up to the standards of masculinity, that my genitals specifically don't give me dysphoria so I cant be trans , but maybe I'm just scared of adding more complications to my life of adding another form of discrimination I'll get to have , that I feel like I'll never find anyone and presenting myself another way will make it 100x harder . Why do I cry if I even begin to imagine myself looking feminine , I just want to close my eyes and have them not open.

Wearing lolita to class for the first time using the cover of halloween, feel amazingly cute rn

I'm looking up at the mirror on my bedroom door and I see a girl on her bed. It's freaking me out a bit but in a good way. This same human I've become so acquainted with seeing, I'm actually successfully conceptualizing her as a woman without going "ughghg but I look like a guy." This is so bizarre, but sooooooo cool

My girl shorts arrived and I’m in love with the way I look in them 🥹 but I might have to get tucking panties or some shit like that if I ever want to wear them outside my bedroom 🥲 I was worried medium might be too small but it’s just right and maybe even a little loose lol

cost for me and my partner to get the train to the town nearby: £18

cost for me and my partner to drive, then park for six hours (inc. fuel): £11

there needs to be some sort of "how to cry guide" for trans creatures,,,,, we have yet to figure it out

Another pair of jeans down

Thighs too thick 😔✊️

I actually scheduled a consult with a voice coach. It's been like, idk a year now and I have made no progress with my voice so hoping that a voice coach can help me. Only problem is that I'm not out at work so I will not be able to go full time with my voice :(

Thank you for your call, we are experiencing higher than normal call volumes...

I don't think I've called a big company since like 2009 where they weren't experiencing "higher than normal call volumes." On the one hand, it makes sense that I'd be calling during their busy times I guess. But every time?

My cat is being chaotic again, running around, trying to stop me from getting work done. She's restless, but she finally settled down and is watching me type this. Unfortunately for her, I have to get up now. Sorry, Lenore

Dreamt I got turned into a snail but I wasn't like the rest of y'all I was and doing what I could to evade capture. My spirit was still strong I was a badass mollusk

Put on my old grey sweatpants (only a few years old tbh) and

Can't really wear my old clothes anymore IG. estrogen is magic fr

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! People keep changing plans and its super overwhelming!!!!!!!! My fun family time has turned into me curling up and crying far away from everyone because the plans kept changing rapidly and everything was so confusing

I think I can manage bottom dysphoria if I can find a way to never have spontaneous erections again 🤔

My dad really gives me vibes sometimes, I swear. He saw that I was growing new hair, and said maybe he should get on E. Jokingly, of course, all in good fun. Would never actually do it, right? This is exactly how I started

Homosexual Desire in Revolutionary Russia

Well... if I were to ever do one of those "self publish e-book slop on Amazon" things... I've got a title for the series.

Thinking about the time I texted my sister "okay but what if I was trans" one evening, and then the next morning followed it up with a good 'ol "lol nvm."

And now here we are like a year later.

Almost crying today realizing just how far I've already gone. Something happened two years ago that should have signaled me toward transitioning, but I got here eventually 🥹

Obligatory: Best decision of my life :niko-dance:

I'm really proud of myself for wearing a skirt in public all day yesterday, I felt quite cute. it probably helped that my partner was there, but tbh I realized I could have done it without her too

with how much I struggle to feel qualified for feminity with my body the way it currently is, this was a really good step. it'll definitely make the wait till surgery easier if I feel a bit better too :p

car is fixed for reals this time

Not trans related but I want few things more than to neuralyze math knowledge from the general populace so we can break this cycle of math being taught and retaught in the stupid ass way it's currently being done.

I remember one time I went out in public with eyeliner and painted nails this old white woman came up to me and said as sweetly as possible "Jesus loves you" before walking away. Chat what does this mean

Boys cute.

The fact that I had vegan mac and tofu tonight coupled with the fact that I didn't have any last night makes tonight leagues better than last night.

think I've found baseline, maybe

I don't know if I'm gullible or naive, is it childlike wonder/innocence or I'm just dumb I'm middle aged (32) if that helps.