212
Praise the Lrod! (lemmy.world)
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[-] EleventhHour@lemmy.world 27 points 4 months ago

thankfully, Jesus gives an H for ehfort

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 4 points 4 months ago

Person dies and arrives in the afterlife in hevaen .... it looks like heaven but everything is a little fucked up. All water is actually alcohol, drinking alcohol doesn't get you drunk, hamburgers make you high, Hitler is dancing around with children, everything is edible, you can speak any language but you have a really high pitched voice, there's a constant slight smell of urine everywhere and angels are obnoxious assholes.

[-] itsgroundhogdayagain@lemmy.ml 24 points 4 months ago

These are the people who want to determine the school curriculum and run the country.

[-] some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org 14 points 4 months ago

Not only am I stupid and uneducated, but I want you to know it!

[-] Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 11 points 4 months ago

He's saying what we're all thinking

[-] Fester@lemm.ee 12 points 4 months ago

The license plate says “fukcin”

[-] sleen@lemmy.zip 9 points 4 months ago

If you love Jesus Crhist, Jesus Crhist will love you back

[-] Resol@lemmy.world 8 points 4 months ago

Jesus Christ? Who's that? I only know our lord and savior Jesus Crhist.

(sarcasm)

[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 7 points 4 months ago

*Knock knock*

Hello, sir. I was wondering if you've heard the good nwes?

[-] Resol@lemmy.world 6 points 4 months ago

Ah yes, I totlaly have.

[-] PythagreousTitties@lemm.ee 2 points 4 months ago

What are you, one of those elephant looking aliens from Mass Effect?

(question)

[-] Resol@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

I've never played that game so I have no idea.

(serious answer)

[-] PythagreousTitties@lemm.ee 1 points 4 months ago

Basically they aren't able to communicate properly so they label everything they say by saying the intent.

[-] Resol@lemmy.world 1 points 4 months ago

Oh right.

I should've used /s when I could.

[-] PythagreousTitties@lemm.ee 1 points 4 months ago

No. That's even worse. You can just use regular written language. It's worked fine for the last several thousand years.

[-] Resol@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago
[-] joshoff@lemmynsfw.com 7 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

In my local variant, we write jizz is Christ. Blessed be.

Also acceptable.

[-] Senseless@feddit.org 6 points 4 months ago
[-] db2@lemmy.world 3 points 4 months ago

I can't find that one image of the dumbass who carved "JESUS" in to his forearm, so pretend I did and you're looking at it.

[-] CheesyFox@lemmy.sdf.org 4 points 4 months ago

jesus hrtist

[-] saltesc@lemmy.world 2 points 4 months ago

I read that as an an explicit on itself. Like, "Jesus Christ! How bad is this?"

I know it's not intended that way, but it's clever. Like a self-sustaining joke.

[-] Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works 2 points 4 months ago
this post was submitted on 05 Jul 2024
212 points (98.6% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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