I'm so tired of bi-erasure (hexbear.net)

submitted 2 years ago by Casscity@hexbear.net to c/chapotraphouse@hexbear.net

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Sorry if this is the wrong comm, but I had to get this off my chest. I am so sick and tired of dealing with bi-erasure. I am a bisexual man who is I'd say 90% attracted to women and 10% attracted to men. Best I can explain it, I am mostly attracted to women and occasionally attracted to a man. It really is that simple, but for a lot of people I might as well be explaining calculus. I understand if most straight people can't fathom it, after all they are straight. But what really irks me is when other LGBT people erase it, telling me I am "in the closet" or whatever. It makes me so damn angry because I am not in the closet, I am open about my bisexuality, yet no one believes it. I have only dated women, but everyone in my life off and online including my gf who herself is LGBTQ+ thinks I am gay. I'm so sick of it I think I'll either just tell people I am straight or become gay.

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[-] RION@hexbear.net 1 points 2 years ago

when other LGBT people erase it

Honestly it confounds me how people can behave like that. Not even from like a "wow how dare you" perspective but legitimately it's incoherent as a position. I can at least understand a straight cis person not getting it because they're never really pushed to reflect on it by society. If you're already queer in some way what's the cognitive issue with believing people can be attracted to more than one gender and in different ways?

[-] Casscity@hexbear.net 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

I can at least understand a straight cis person not getting it because they’re never really pushed to reflect on it by society. If you’re already queer in some way what’s the cognitive issue with believing people can be attracted to more than one gender and in different ways?

You nailed it, its totally baffling to me. How can you yourself be queer and just not understand it? Is it really that difficult to imagine I am attracted to people regardless of gender? To me it seems like the most simple thing in the world, "I like what I like."

[-] Frank@hexbear.net 1 points 2 years ago

The only thing I can figure is "what no theory does to a motherfucker" is at work bc how disconnected do you have to be from queer theory and queer history to dismiss bi people?