this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2026
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[–] Hazzard@lemmy.zip 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Oh, interesting. Looking at your comment history, I'll give you the benefit of a doubt that you're unaware of incel subculture.

On its face, you're right that the term is fine, involuntary celibate should mean something like "single", or maybe "virgin", which I wouldn't use as an insult either. In practice however, those who self-identify as incels tend to be extreme, and have a lot of hate for women. It's like an extremist version of the "girls always pick the bad boys, nice guys finish last" ideology. They're also the origin of other harmful ideas, like "Alpha/Beta/Sigma male" culture, the kind that someone like Andrew Tate takes advantage of.

So to go back to the suffix, which I described as "someone obsessed with something", it's referring to this obsession with sex and hating women in a derogatory way, which is much more deserving of mockery than just being celibate.

[–] ThunderComplex@lemmy.today 2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Ahh, thanks for the explanation. I’ve heard the term incel here and there, but always just took it at face value. I had no idea that the whole alpha male thing originated from there.
Obsession with sex and hatred for women does sound highly contradictory to me, but I’m not gonna question it. This does not look like a fun rabbithole to fall into. I will agree, however, that this is deserving of mockery and ridicule.

[–] Hazzard@lemmy.zip 2 points 20 hours ago

Haha, agreed, the two are contradictory, I don't think it's a very stable or effective worldview. You can see how stuff like Alpha Male comes out of that. "If women only like badasses who are mean to them, I'll deliberately be a badass who's mean to women". I've heard it said that the best advice for an incel is to just... find a real hobby, work on yourself, find some real happiness and become an interesting person who's not obsessed with women and sex, and maybe you'll cross paths with someone who might genuinely like you down the line. And that advice definitely checks out, blaming women for everything wrong in your life isn't a way to attract anyone, but they tend to misdiagnose the problem. Definitely not a fun rabbit hole.

Anyway, happy I could help out! Enjoy your new cursed internet knowledge.