this post was submitted on 23 Jun 2026
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Tongue condoms?
Imagine your tongue getting pregnant
Imagine your dick getting pregnant, and your child bursting out of it like an alien.
Hyenas don't have to imagine this.
I'm not sure that's normally how that works. That is the condom doesn't go on the thing that gets pregnant.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Female_condom
I know they technically exist. But I've never seen one in any store in any country I've been.
Most public health programs have some available to give away, but commercially they're rare because few people want to pay over a dollar per condom for them.
What makes them nice is you can safely put one in hours before sex happens. Add some silicone lube (which they don't have a problem with), wear a loose skirt, and you have a perfect setup for spontaneous sex in a risky location.
You know, you're making good points.
I think they have to teach you how to use it at the doctor and they give it to you. Not positive though.
Tonguedoms.
Hallowed be thy name. Thy tonguedom come.
I think a tongue dom is something different though...