From a pretty early age I decided I didn't want to get married or have kids cuz both my parents seemed utterly miserable. For a long time I found it weird anyone wanted to do it at all, why would you want to be trapped with someone you hate who you get into screaming arguments all the time?

And it's not just me, you see a lot of jokes online about people like playing that one scene from Marriage Story while playing old N64 games for nostalgia.

I think the experience of seeing our own parents be so miserable maybe soured a lot of us on starting families.

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[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 19 points 3 weeks ago

My reactionary parents definitely soured marriage and parenthood for me. Ethically I barely feel comfortable with conditional pet ownership. Causing CPTSD in a child with a dysfunctional environment would be the most destructive thing I do in my life. Climate change is still my big deciding factor, but I've seen how those power dynamics fail and how the material stressors of both feed into those toxic dynamics. If I can't guarantee I wouldn't fall into the same trap I'm not willing to expose a kid to that risk.

At the same time, it'd be nice to be a positive influence for a kid. I'm not opposed to adopting if I'm in a stable long-term relationship with another communist and own a homestead. That child's environment just has to be a sanctuary from an otherwise dehumanising society.