this post was submitted on 19 Mar 2026
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[–] kinkles@sh.itjust.works 43 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I was really skeptical about this, but after a few weeks I realized my keys were wrapped in aluminum foil and I actually started feeling safer

[–] SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 26 points 1 day ago (3 children)

It keeps the microplastics from infecting your penis in your pocket.

[–] whiskybourbon@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Jokes on them. I quit carrying my penis in my pocket ages ago

[–] WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (2 children)

One of those detachable penises eh?

Sometimes, people say i should get it attached permanently, but, i dunno... I LIKE having a detachable penis.

[–] Honytawk@feddit.nl 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

No way, the new one with the vibration function?

I'm jealous.

7 settings. Not much to look at but it will wreck the outside.

[–] WereCat@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

How do you know that i’m carrying a spare penis in my pocket?

Not my pocket penis!