Fuck this incel nonsense.

Am ugly and fat, but I'm a nice person, respect everyone (who deserves respect), and I expect everything I do to be non transactional.

I help people because they need help and I can help.

results? built a friend's group I adore (I literally admire them and sometimes I am still in disbelief that I'm their friend), and have women hit on me, also have a poly thing going on. And I have never had so much and such good sex.

"Nice" means being a good person, if you are nice to be transactional, then that isn't nice, that's a red flag... and a good thing women stay away from you.

yes, women can also be transactional, being an asshole is intersectional. but that is a slightly different tangent.

Also, I loathe that because bullshit like this the bar is so painfully low. It genuinely hurts me when a woman gives me a compliment that only reveals how fucking low the bar is. and it is so fucking low. that if you can't pass it, then that's on you.

if you want constructive advice, accept that no relationship is transactional. be proactive in socializing, not like going to bars to pick people up, but join active groups for your interests. D&D, political action groups, Mutual aids... attend regularly and before you know it you'll have a healthy diverse friend group. assume no one is interested in you as a partner unless there's a bit of flirting. Even if you don't find a partner in those groups, those people have their own groups. and if they see you as a good person they will recommend you to their single friends. But this is not a guide to get laid. If you do all of this to get laid, you are a horrible person. and hopefully, they will sense it and not put anyone at risk. you do that because you love to [chosen group activity], and want to make friendships. Also, consent means they can say no whenever they want, even after a couple dates and you have to be mature and be like "that's ok, I wish you well' and not like "That B[slur]".

If you are a basement dwelling incel with severe depression from loneliness and severe loniless from depression, you can crawl out of that depression by doing stuff. Joining mutual aids really did that for me, little by little I built a community for myself, and I'm now happy (was chronically depressed for so long I forgot what positive feelings feel like).