this post was submitted on 11 Jan 2026
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Chapotraphouse
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Do men not have eyes?
It's hard to actually see clearly when your eyes pop out of your head like a cartoon character
Ah, a skill issue.
You see, you don't actually want your eyes to elongate, that's just you thinking that seeing from a bit closer will actually help you, but unless you are already very close, it's a false urge. It just makes your eyes floppy & unfocused.

What you want to do is enlarge your eyes, like so:
(sauce: Red Hot Riding Hood (1943))
The secret advanced technique, if you are brave (note that they might not be able to reattach your eyes tho):

Unless you want to microscope the situation:

Be the change you want to see in the world