So I’m browsing my phone and I see Kyle Rittenhouse, remember that shithead? He’s famous because he killed someone. The right tried to turn him into a celebrity but he was so helpless he couldn’t hack it. He couldn’t handle being on a leash for thousands of dollars. I’d embarrass myself on a street corner frequented exclusively by people I have a crush on for the kind of money this murderer threw away.
Meanwhile Charlie Kirk was a genius by comparison. A bright rising star. Still a fucking racist dumbass but capable of wearing a suit and putting on an act. Capable of speaking while holding eye contact. Capable of subtly decreasing the circumference of his face. Remember the bar is “not a remorseless murderer” so clearing it isn’t impressive but I will give Charlie credit where it’s due: he didn’t kill anyone.
And I think about this. How the right wing is so destructive it can’t help but be self destructive. It produces white male gunmen and here’s 2 case examples from within their own house: Charlie gets killed by the kind of person they defended in Kyle. Enshitification in action. What a bummer. What a letdown. Poor Charlie couldn’t even find a partner who would mourn his passing. Meanwhile Kyle, the guy they all wish they could forget is still around.
It’s a brutal fate. 
. Couldn’t have happened to a more deserving guy.
It was a profound bummer. He should have survived the initial attack and been in suffering agony that left him bed ridden and unable to espouse his horrible ideas but fully aware his state is a direct consequence of his actions--surviving just long enough to see his legacy fade before finally dying.
Revive Charlie Kirk and give him locked-in syndrome for 60 years
Congratulations, you've finally found my line. I wouldn't do this to Charlie Kirk. I wouldn't even do this to Hitler. I winced just reading this comment lmao
How about a week