this post was submitted on 08 Dec 2025
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traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns
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When you're taking pictures of yourself, don't use a mirror, it'll double the dirt and distort you. Just put your phone on a little tripod (very cheap) at waist level roughly 6 feet away, and use the self-timer. Try not to go any lower, that's how you look like a giant with a chin. Too high above you, and you can look like you have a massive had, and a small body.
Face the light source, not away from it, and diffuse lighting is generally better.
There's loads of posing guides out their, generally just try to get your whole body standing up. Maybe hit THE POSE.
Oops, forgot to hit post when I first finished, no matter.
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Enby intern at work calling me "man" "guy" "boy" today like it's a competition to unwittingly misgender me. And I couldn't correct them because it wasn't in private and I didn't want other people hearing.
Usually I don't mind getting referred to as a man at work because only a few people know otherwise. But the fact that:
Made it just very not good for me. I know it's not their fault and they almost certainly don't mean anything by it but still. I thought about it on the train ride home and then laid in bed and then did things to myself that would probably get this comment removed under the new rules.
I did call a friend which helped a little, she was quite supportive
It sounds like there are more than enough signals to at least not assume at this point :/ Unfortunately, trans people can be be clumsy and shitty about gender stuff too sometimes
Are they someone you would consider coming out to sooner to avoid this in the future?
Yeah I even have a note written saying "I'm not a guy btw" that I'm gonna try to pass to them today.
I hope that goes well!
It did! They were about as gracious as one can expect in the circumstances. Plus now they're just gonna use my name instead of any pronouns which is pretty much second best option (she/her will not be happening for a while)