671

Stop comparing programming languages

  • Python is versatile
  • JavaScript is powerful
  • Ruby is elegant
  • C is essential
  • C++
  • Java is robust
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] chraebsli@programming.dev 201 points 4 months ago
  • PHP is old
  • HTML is NOT A PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE!!!
  • CSS is
    ︎ ︎ ︎ not alig-

︎ ︎ ︎ ned

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 49 points 4 months ago

PHP is old

Same age as Ruby, Java and JavaScript, but younger than Python, C, and C++. 😛

[-] Guydht@lemmy.world 33 points 4 months ago

I'm guessing they meant "old" as in "no one uses it anymore, it's dead"

[-] asyncrosaurus@programming.dev 56 points 4 months ago

Meanwhile PHP quietly runs 80% of the internet by being used for WordPress.

[-] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 30 points 4 months ago

Don’t tell my bosses that. Or the PHP community as a whole for that matter. Then I might have to get a real job.

[-] ripcord@lemmy.world 32 points 4 months ago

I'm sorry. If you exclude the millions of sites using it, it is virtually unused.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[-] Xylight 93 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)
  • Python is NameError: name 'term_to_describe_python' is not defined

  • JavaScript is [object Object]

  • Ruby is TypeError: Int can't be coerced into String

  • C is segmentation fault

  • C++

  • Java is

Exception in thread "main" java.lang.NullPointerException: Cannot read the termToDescribeJava because is null at ThrowNullExcep.main(ThrowNullExcep.java:7)
Exec.main(ThrowNullExcep.java:7) 
  • CSS j ust # sucks
  • Kotlin is type inference failed. The value of the type parameter K should be mentioned in input types
  • Go is unused variable
  • Rust is Compiling term v0.1.0 (/home/james/projects/Term)
[-] sus@programming.dev 23 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

C++ is std::__cxx11::list<std::__shared_ptr<table, (__gnu_cxx::_Lock_policy)0>, std::allocator<std::__shared_ptr<table, (__gnu_cxx::_Lock_policy)0> > >::erase(std::_List_const_iterator<std::__shared_ptr<table, (__gnu_cxx::_Lock_policy)0> >) /usr/include/c++/12/bits/list.tcc:158

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (8 replies)
[-] SatouKazuma@programming.dev 83 points 4 months ago

Mfw Rustaceans don't exist :(

Also, JavaScript...why are you the way you are? Does anyone have advice for learning it so it makes sense? I can't even get tutorial projects to run properly...

[-] davidgro@lemmy.world 55 points 4 months ago

This meme is older than rust.

[-] polonius-rex@kbin.run 38 points 4 months ago

actually it says 8h meaning it's only 8 hours old

[-] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 23 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

It will be 8 hours old forever.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] polonius-rex@kbin.run 34 points 4 months ago

use typescript and don't look too hard at the infrastructure

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] MajorHavoc@programming.dev 18 points 4 months ago

The mantra that got me through JavaScript was "almost nothing we do here is able to be synchronous".

Everything about the language makes more sense, with that context.

[-] magic_lobster_party@kbin.run 17 points 4 months ago

I like Douglas Crockford’s talks about the “good parts” of JavaScript. They’re old and probably a bit outdated, but he explain quite well the history and why JavaScript is the way like it is.

It clicked for me when I saw them the first time. Still hate JavaScript though.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[-] magic_lobster_party@kbin.run 69 points 4 months ago

Just accept it, all languages suck

[-] asyncrosaurus@programming.dev 106 points 4 months ago

"There are only two kinds of languages: the ones people complain about and the ones nobody uses."

[-] magic_lobster_party@kbin.run 43 points 4 months ago

That’s why Haskell is so loved. Nobody uses it.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (10 replies)
[-] drspod@lemmy.ml 66 points 4 months ago

ITT: Rust programmers rewriting the joke in Rust.

[-] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 51 points 4 months ago

Are those adjectives randomly chosen?

[-] odium@programming.dev 49 points 4 months ago

Yeah, JavaScript powerful? How?

[-] AceSLS@ani.social 51 points 4 months ago

By running everthing in a single thread obviously. Won't get more powerful than that

load more comments (22 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] pelya@lemmy.world 49 points 4 months ago

C++ is OVERWHELMINGLY SUPERIOR, if you ask any professional C++ developer.

[-] BatmanAoD@programming.dev 29 points 4 months ago

I was a professional C++ developer for several years, and came to the conclusion that any professional C++ developers who don't acknowledge its flaws have a form of Stockholm Syndrome.

[-] eco@lemm.ee 14 points 4 months ago

This is true of every language. If you can't think of things you don't like about the language you're working in (and/or its tooling) you just don't know the language very well or are in denial.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[-] BrokenGlepnir@lemmy.world 35 points 4 months ago

There was an adjective for C++. It's just the pointer was dropped.

[-] luciole@beehaw.org 35 points 4 months ago
  • C++ is fine
  • Python is fine
  • C# is fine
  • PHP is fine
  • JavaScript is fine
  • C is fine
  • Java is fine

I could go on

[-] polonius-rex@kbin.run 29 points 4 months ago

PHP is fine

i will fine you

[-] CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 15 points 4 months ago

JavaScript is also not fine.

C++ apparently has a lot of footguns if you use too many parts of it. C and orthodox C++ are fine.

load more comments (23 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[-] umbraroze@lemmy.world 31 points 4 months ago

JavaScript is powerful

Old joke (yes, you can tell):

"JavaScript: You shoot yourself in the foot. If using Netscape, your arm falls off. If using Internet Explorer, your head explodes."

[-] mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 24 points 4 months ago

C++ is all of those, provided you pick any 10% of it.

You're not supposed to cast every spell in the evil grimoire.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] psycho_driver@lemmy.world 24 points 4 months ago

C is powerful. Javascript is a husky midwestern gal at a Chinese buffet.

load more comments (1 replies)
[-] onlinepersona@programming.dev 21 points 4 months ago

C++ is a surprise CVE generator.

Anti Commercial-AI license

[-] user1234@lemmynsfw.com 20 points 4 months ago
[-] Iloveyurianime@ani.social 18 points 4 months ago

what about Holy C? is it only usable to people that are actually god choosen programmers?

load more comments (4 replies)
[-] DarkCloud@lemmy.world 18 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

C++ is focused on getting a strong degree of root control over the hardware of lots of systems. Which is part of why it's difficult.

load more comments (3 replies)
[-] Kushan@lemmy.world 17 points 4 months ago
load more comments (4 replies)
[-] reillypascal@lemmy.world 16 points 4 months ago

The only reason I use C++ is because that's what all the main audio plugin tools use. It's warty and annoying, although I'm confused why Java would rank higher

[-] Bazz@feddit.de 14 points 4 months ago

So we just ignore JavaScript being on that list at sll?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[-] tiredofsametab@kbin.run 14 points 4 months ago
  • Rust has safety and efficiency close to C
  • Perl is processing most of your healthcare records
  • Ada is doing space stuff
  • Go is going places
load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›
this post was submitted on 14 Jun 2024
671 points (93.0% liked)

Programmer Humor

19463 readers
14 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS