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Secret Service Agent Busted For Alleged Hotel Hallway Masturbation (www.tmz.com)

submitted 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) by Evilphd666@hexbear.net to c/acab@hexbear.net

13 comments fedilink hide all child comments

volcel-judge

jagoff John Spillman was arrested for indecent exposure over the weekend ... with law enforcement claiming he was [spilling seed] in a hotel hallway. i-cant

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[–] KuroXppi@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago

Busted either way

[–] none@hexbear.net 9 points 1 week ago

Journalism is dead.

[–] quarrk@hexbear.net 7 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This title is giving “Jurisprudence fetishist gets off on technicality”

[–] Canonical_Warlock@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago

[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 6 points 1 week ago

After all the reporting about the elite operators doing drugs I’m just going to assume since all the secret service guys come from those circles that this guy was twacked out on meth doing some speed jackin

[–] Hermes@hexbear.net 5 points 1 week ago

John Spillman kelly

[–] AssortedBiscuits@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

John Spillman's john spilling semen

[–] lurker_supreme@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

This freak followed someone to their hotel door and started masturbating right outside of it. I'm going to guess this was attempted sexual assault ...

[–] UmbraVivi@hexbear.net 4 points 1 week ago

John Spillman

"Sir, there's been an incident involving Agent Jack Offerman masturbating in public."

"Nobody could've seen this coming."

[–] robot_dog_with_gun@hexbear.net 3 points 1 week ago

look he just really had to go. sometimes you don't make it to the toilet in time.

[–] Kopfrkingl@hexbear.net 2 points 1 week ago

The woke has come for gooners...

[–] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

John Spillman Busted Masturbating is canonically the correct headline

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 1 points 1 week ago

Agent Spillman, go on Chapo!