Join the army, see the world, meet interesting people, kill them
this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2026
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Join the army, ~~see the world, meet interesting people, kill them~~ clean toilets for 4 years.
Soooooo, at what day do you get your own grenades?
Sooner than you'd think.
And they'll remove the shipping pin for you before handing it over.
I only need one
That reply alone should’ve been the end of the conversation 😭
I actually wanted to join the military fresh out of high school but I was informed by my recruiter that they don't take autistic people
It's a loss to their logistics supply corps.
Same, but my out was a sleep disorder that I grew out of about 5 years prior, before I finished middle school.
Well that's a damn lie but hey, bullets dodged
No lies
The recruiter lied. We believe you. But they lied to you.
i'm certain the military has its share of undiagnosed autists, tho
Shit tons. Mostly in the nerdier jobs.
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in Russia, they agitate during their studies, promising a diploma) I can already see how such a person who has received a diploma in this way will work well in education.
I assume everyone has heard the Arlo Guthrie thanksgiving song. "I wanna kill, kill, kill, kill!" "You're our boy."
I wonder what the response would be if you said something like: I'm already in the Navy.
"Fuck.... I'm sorry. I'm so... so so sorry."
One of my favorite Marx brothers one-liners was always, "Join the Army! See the Navy."
spoiler
You can also write it, "Join the Army! Sea the Navy," if ya wanna be real schmucky.
One of my favorite Marx brothers one-liners was always, "Join the Army! See the Navy."
spoiler
You can also write it, "Join the Army! Sea the Navy," if ya wanna be real schmucky.
"More like the Gay-vy, amirite? But seriously, just come in and talk. I need at least three other people to fill out a form or they send me to the front."
The bar has been low for at least 30 years. Marine recruiter wouldn't leave me alone even after I started hitting on him.
The bar has been low for at least 30 years.
It was comically easy to get enlisted during Korea if you were under 18.
If you'd have joined then you'd realize your mistake. They just assumed you already had the same sense of humor somehow.
It was during DADT and I wasn't joking. Though since then I have met more gay marines than any other branch (I guess if you want to prove your manliness to the world...).
Yeah. The humor in the military back then and now is best described as "It's not gay if you say no homo!" And yet somehow also very homophobic. (Less so now than when I was in the army) It wouldn't be hard at all to find a private flirting as a joke.
have spent 6 months in the austrian military and i can tell you that gay jokes were about 90% of how my roommates spent their free time. like hitting each other's butts with a towel and stuff. it was entertaining, sad i didn't see more of it.
I hated the recruitment texts and calls. The high school and university apparently just give your information to recruiters.
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Oldest child was contacted via text by a recruiter. We told them to waste their time. Say "yes, I'll talk to you about it if you treat ME to a meal at [local restaurant]." (emphasis mine)
The recruiter ghosted them after that.
i wouldn't go to said meal. like, having an awkward 1.5 hours with somebody that you don't like? do you know how annoying that is? have you ever been stuck on a bad date?
We had an army recruiter come talk to our history class in high school (this was in the '80s). After the guy's talk he said "any questions"?" My friend Rob said "yeah, I have a question: does napalm still stick to kids?"
Ironically that's a good recruiter. Anything that looks like fraternizing with potential recruits outside official activities is a huge no no.
Buy me dinner before you fuck me.
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