this post was submitted on 12 Mar 2026
621 points (98.1% liked)

Programmer Humor

30336 readers
1620 users here now

Welcome to Programmer Humor!

This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!

For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.

Rules

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] fibojoly@sh.itjust.works 6 points 18 hours ago

I have this feeling it's more like a mentalist mind-trick.

We are fed so many inputs from so many sources, we don't notice the influence, but we end up thinking about such and such, maybe talking about it with other people and suddenly, lo and behold! the algorithm presents us with an ad for the very subject that was on our mind! Mind reading! Magic!

But just like a Derren Brown subject, we just picked the card he wanted us to pick from the beginning.

I reckon the only thing preventing us from being completely subjugated is the amount of actors trying to influence us simultaneously, as we flock through our attention grabbing sources.

Which is why the consolidation of media is such a worrisome phenomenon. One dude controlling an entire network of sources means you are constantly under the same influence.

And then you get MAGA.

I wonder what's next?

[–] some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I see the debate happening in here, and I honestly think the way this really works is a lot weirder and at a bigger scale than what most of us might imagine. We've had pretty strong machine learning for quite a while... we still don't know exactly how it works, but these models have reasoning, pattern recognition and the ability to classify data which improves every day.

The likes of Google ingest all manner of disparate data points, buying and selling them to each other, responding to the push and pull of markets and trends. These players have a realtime profile on every single person who touches their platform. Users touch that platform with almost everything they do. These touch points where data get gathered are not just users' own personal devices, either. They increasingly happen via corporate and state-controlled devices and networks out in the built environment.

We feed these entities continuously with our actions, whether we know it or not. They continuously map all the intersections of millions of data points across billions of profiles, theoretically getting as granular as needed. It's picking up patterns that humans would never think to look for, and then feeding it back to us. Generative agents fit into this framework, hand in glove.

At this scale, these entities can derive trends, interests, motivations. They create massive feedback loops, driving trends as it suits them and they predict - or try to - what we'll do, wear, buy, eat. Where we go online, and IRL. And what we search for.

This is a massive, largely invisible, endlessly adaptable machine they've created. No one person can fathom the entirety of it. Even for the engineers who contribute, they only know their one small piece, and they may be unaware of how it contributes to the whole.

The only ceiling to it is data storage, compute, and access/adoption. They're obviously working to massively raise that on all fronts.

This is becoming the mycelium beneath our forest floor. Like trees, we find it convenient and practical to know each other's statuses and whereabouts, to converse, and to get things. We eat from it, or it feeds us. Meanwhile, it shapes the environment itself, deciding who rises and falls, spreading, terraforming the earth and transforming the substrate of life according to its own alien logic. Unlike a mycelial network, it has our own hubris reflected and embodied. It's not self-limiting, not in a way that means anything to the well-being of most of us. The end result here won't exactly be balance and homeostasis in the ecosystem.

They don't need our microphones. They may have needed them at some point. And don't get me wrong - they'll definitely still listen in when it's convenient for them. What they have at this point though, and especially in the very near future, is already exponentially more efficient and powerful than bulk listening. Let's recognize it for what it is!

[–] NerdsGonnaNerd@sh.itjust.works 2 points 20 hours ago

Very fitting comparison! Nicely written! :)

[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 23 points 1 day ago (5 children)

Stories of these companies listening through everybody's mics are like modern day ghost stories. It definitely totally happens every single day but nobody ever manages to get a piece of hard evidence. Maybe the algorithms can sense wireshark like ghosts sense cameras

[–] infinitesunrise@slrpnk.net 13 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

Cox Media Group got kicked off Google's ad partner program a few years ago when 404 Media scooped that they had a feature called CMG Active Listening which did exactly this. They had a slide deck Audio spying by advertisers is like doping in pro sports, everybody does it and you only get caught if you're stupid. Remember back in 2013 a whistleblowing NSA contractor told us to put our phones in the fridge if we wanted to have a secret conversation? He had a slide deck, too. The western world is run by a cult of pedophiles, the fact that our phones listen in on us without our consent is not a stretch.

[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 1 points 22 hours ago

So the only piece of evidence is a single mention on a low quality PowerPoint presentation from a company nobody has ever heard of. This is tinfoil hat territory

[–] Noja@sopuli.xyz 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Meta / Instagram / Facebook definitely does this, they even hack your phone to get even more data.

[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 5 points 1 day ago

Neither of those articles has any evidence of them secretly listening through everybody's microphone

[–] PumaStoleMyBluff@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Metaphors are just a step too far, eh?

No, they're not "listening" to audio, but their servers are definitely listening for all the data we send them.

[–] Ledivin@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

It definitely totally happens every single day but nobody ever manages to get a piece of hard evidence.

Are you just lazy and in denial? There is traffic sent from both Alexa and Google Home every time it detects something that it considers speech, regardless of whether the wake word was detected. This is not debatable, set up your own tests.

[–] GiveOver@feddit.uk 1 points 22 hours ago

I have Google Home and monitors on my own network, I've never seen suspicious activity. Here's somebody else doing it:

https://labs.sogeti.com/google-home-spying/

[–] bridgeenjoyer@sh.itjust.works 4 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Anyone who says they aren't listening are idiots who know nothing of big tech. They are listening.

[–] Bazoogle@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Why would they need to listen? That's a lot of processing power for information we already give them. They don't need to listen, honestly. They get more information from us than we verbally communicate.

[–] Ledivin@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Why would they need to listen? That's a lot of processing power

But... why would they care? It's your energy bill, not theirs.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 1 points 18 hours ago

I wish it was that way. Soo many ads are completely irrelevant. The only platform where I get good ads is google news (the swipe left on Pixel). It's filled with Adafruit ads. I'm cool with that.

[–] OrteilGenou@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That might be useful.

It's more like, you buy a pair of boots online.

FB and Chrome for the next week and a half BOOTS!! BOOTS HERE!!

[–] Megacomboburrito@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

I think that might work for certain items, you keep seeing the ads and the next thing you know, you now have a growing collection of said item

[–] cosmicrookie@lemmy.world 40 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

It might be the other way around too though... You might be thinking of buying something, because Facebook or google have convinced you that you need it

That said, I had to create an account in FB due to work and studies. I did some research and decided to run it only on a browser and use a seperate browser only for FB. Along with some strict privacy rules.

My account was flagged within 30 seconds of creation. They asked for a selfie ID that they got and they did a manual assessment but banned the account nonetheless for not following community guidelines

You can't even read their community guidelines without accepting their cookie policy

[–] Stupidmanager@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Try having an account since 2007 and logging in once a month to check in with friends, but this last year I get banned for using vpn. Same deal, verify, ban, unlock, verify, ban. I personally like that they tell me my account was compromised…

I have it running now on and old Mac that isn’t logged in with any other accounts. It’s on its own, doesnt use Adblock and uses the public WiFi from the coffee shop below my apartment. If I have to use Facebook, they can figure my usage patterns out without help.

[–] Noja@sopuli.xyz 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I’ll have two number 9s, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45s, one with cheese, and a large soda.

[–] Hiro8811@lemmy.world 6 points 1 day ago

Big Smoke is that you?

[–] Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 58 points 2 days ago (1 children)

...superPAC dedicated to funding policies that hold IT organizations liable for the consequences of their actions.

[–] Hideakikarate@sh.itjust.works 37 points 2 days ago (3 children)

We are gathered here today to honor the memory of Remember_the_tooth, who unfortunately committed suicide by shooting themselves 3 times in the back of the head and falling out a locked window.

[–] anomnom@sh.itjust.works 3 points 1 day ago

After a sudden spike in their car insurance, healthcare, and home owners insurance rates.

Dynamic pricing is already here. If you don’t have the app on your phone dinner costs 25% more than for the tracked.

[–] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 points 2 days ago
[–] parsizzle@piefed.social 1 points 1 day ago

We'll never know why they did it. I guess depression can sneak up on the best of us 😔

[–] rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)
[–] prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 8 points 1 day ago

That's who the person is talking to in the room. They don't even need to sneakily listen in

[–] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 8 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Mate I'm its even worse than we could possibly imagine by now.

~20 years ago, when smartphones were new and super expensive, I arranged to meet my friend using Facebook chat. I did not have a mobile phone at all, I used desktop PC to access it. While I was in his car we were talking about possible careers and I said i would probably enjoy being a teacher. When I got home and logged back in, every single banner ad was for teaching courses, teach English abroad, teachers wanted.

It definitely used his smartphones microphone to hear that there were 2 people in the car, and used the chat log to figure out it was me, and this was a long time ago.

We all know they're doing it yet there are 0 laws to stop it. Huh. Time to start axing data centers.

[–] Appoxo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Out of curiosity: And you never researched any teaching topic before?

[–] yermaw@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 day ago

Nope, I was just desperate for something to say other than "I have absolutely no ambition"

[–] Cevilia@lemmy.blahaj.zone 24 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I talk about Kendal Mint Cake whenever I think I might be around an open mic.

I and my wife constantly get adverts for it on Amazon and in other places.

None of us have ever bought any.

Hashtag confusion to the enemy, or something

[–] Echolynx@lemmy.zip 11 points 1 day ago

Kendal Mint Cake

I've never heard of these, being across the pond and all that. Now I'm tempted to sneak this into conversations and see if the algorithms fall for it...

[–] A_norny_mousse@piefed.zip 5 points 1 day ago

So instead of screaming bullshit ads you get pics of a confectionary classic?

Wish tech companies respected my privacy they're awful people to interact with.

[–] Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 10 points 2 days ago (5 children)

What did I miss? Facebook has done this for well over a decade, but how does Google illegally listen in now?

[–] ThunderQueen@lemmy.world 42 points 2 days ago

Also been doing it for over a decade. Cookies and other data tracking software. The entire mainstream internet relies on google and aws. They are and have been tracking everything and attaching it to your ip and linking it to other devices and accounts like fb. All in the name of advertising and surveillance

[–] dovahking@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago (2 children)

How do you think google assistant works?

[–] zurohki@aussie.zone 8 points 2 days ago

In my experience, badly.

[–] bokherif@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Eh Siri is no different really

[–] jol@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 2 days ago

The fact this meme mentions Facebook should tell you approximately how old it is.

[–] jafra@slrpnk.net 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Oh, you're right. The google-guy waltzes right in alongside yourself. Doesn't bother waiting outside to listen. And to disallow him entry is rocket science mixed with slapstick idiocracy.

Lucky my do i know how to load a CustomRoms.

You re right. The depiction of google is a bit off.

It's your phone, it's your app store, it's your browser, it's your email, it's your storage, it's your search, it's your maps, it's your music, it's your news, it's your credit card, it's your password manager

Google is so deeply integrated into most people's lives that they can't imagine going without it.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›