The only possible explanation is that they didn't use enough AI.
this post was submitted on 14 Nov 2025
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Ubisoft better get comfortable with not owning their own company.
For being too fat for their own good, tear the damn thing down.
I've never heard of this happening before? I'm sure it has, but first time for me.
Oh it has, but the implications become clear when you look at the ones that did. Like evergrand...
Too late to short it I guess
I remember when Ubisoft was a logo I liked seeing on my gaming screen.
Yeah, it was around the time when I was excited for the Assassin's Creed games.
That logo quit being worthwhile seeing 15 years ago.
Yeah... I didn't say when that was. 👴
Now it just looks like a flushing toilet.
I can never unsee that now.
I hear below the equator the logo spins in reverse
(Side note: this isn't actually true - toilets swirl in a particular direction based on the design of the bowl and water jets, not whether or not they're below the equator)
I saw what I imagine is a tourist attraction demonstrating that it's "true" but you can definitely see them rotate their arm in opposite directions. They unplug a sink that that carry across the equator.
Either way, he recommended that everyone "freak the fuck out for the next few days and speculate as much as possible until they announce something,"
Advice after my own heart. Freaking out and speculating are always the best move.
Maybe the dog ate their homework?
The only games in my Steam library that I can't play are Ubisoft.
Fuk Ubi. Forever. I would be happy if they went under.
The Nestle of video games.
The only Ubi game I play is Just Dance Now. Sadly I can't think of a non-Ubi alternative to that gameplay :/
The rabbit hole goes deep on this one.
I found it surreally hard to find new dance game - until I discovered that much of the player community had (I guess?) moved to an open source game engine called StepMania.
I play StepMania happily enough, now. It is nice how many different songs I can now add with community contributed step configurations.
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All you had to do was make good and fun games. How do you fuck THAT up???? Especially when you were already doing it.
And not to mention...
"Hey guys, what can we make that people really want?"
"I hear people all the time over the last decade asking for a new Splinter Cell game."
"Yeah, ok, Brad. We'll call that plan B... Every year with this asshole. Does anyone have any REAL ideas???"
Because fuck gamers, right, Ubi? Expedition 33 showed the world what current games makers can do when pricks in suits arent around to muddy the waters. The quicker UBI folds, and all that talent leaves to make something that they actually want to make the better.
Nah fuck that if they make a new splinter cell game it would end up being open world with a cosmetic store
To be fair, they are too big.
They just have too many employees and costs. The way they’re organized, they’re stuck with gigantic budget, milquetoast, broad appeal games just to attempt sales they need to break even, with all the inefficiency that comes at that team size… unless they fire a ton of people and split up the rest.
My observation over the past decade is that “medium size” is the game dev sweet spot. Think Coffee Stain, Obsidian, and so on.
They are also hellbent on infecting everything they touch with Denuvo malware. I haven’t bought anything of theirs in years for that reason alone.
I have a lifetime boycott of all things Ubisoft for this very reason. I bought game after game after game from the late 90's until early 2000's. 100% of them were legal purchases and with the CD in the drive... "please insert CD " error
Then I became the lead developer for gameloft.com and saw how completely incompetent the French leadership of the company is. Absolute morons to the highest levels.
Never another penny shall be conveyed to Ubi from my holdings.
edit: You wanna know what I'm talking about? Ok. They import the director from France. He does not speak English, he does not speak Quebecois, which is very different than Parisian French. He has no knowledge of the games industry whatsoever, but is a cherished family friend. He cannot communicate with anybody in written or verbal ways. He shows up for work at 10am and takes 2 hour coffee with other "leadership" and then lunch. Then he comes back from a 2 hour lunch, and him and come C-Level turnip laugh at his Billy Bass for 30 minutes. I am not making any of this up. This man installs a friend he met into the position of Executive Producer. The man's previous experience was managing an Esso gas station. No embellishment. So I'm the Sr dev and I'm the fucking acting director, account manager, game designer, executive producer, producer, technical producer, project manager, director of production, developer, creative director, QA lead, every god damned thing just to get some corny-ass games produced.
edit2: Laughing at a Billy Bass. A Billy. Bass. Singing. Fish. Laughing at it uproariously.
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But how do the shareholders feel?
Like they just licked a French doods ashtray.
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